Roses and Thorns
by Ski000Girl
Summary: Malfoy never thought he'd see the day when he felt like this for a girl especially a Gryffindor. Now he's doing everything to keep her around, but she having not been in a relationship before is nervous especially when it comes to the first kiss.
1. Ideas

It was the first day of class and already Hermione Granger was running late

a/n First off thank you for stumbling across this story and I hope you enjoy it. Also Ginny's going to talk about some stuff and she wasn't actually there for most of it in the books but for the sake of the story please pretend that she was. Or pretend that somebody told her that info if it makes you feel better. Remember though you are reading fanfiction so everything isn't going to be identical to the books. Enjoy.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

It was the first day of class and already Hermione Granger was running late. Tardiness was one of her worst pet peeves along side with outright skipping class and lying but somehow those had become a part of her life since she met the two boys she called her best friends six years previous.

Not intentionally had she forgotten her bag upstairs. At dawn she had been so tired listening to her dorm mates talking that she completely gave up on sleep and headed outside to sit by the lake. She planned to eat breakfast when it was first served and then make her way back up to the dorm to collect her things. That never happened. As she had been sitting on the edge of the lake she remembered closing her eyes because the sun was very bright as it was rising. The next thing she knew the sun was a lot higher in the sky and she was late for class. Ignoring her rumbling stomach she set off at a run towards the Gryffindor Tower. Making it up there in record time she sprinted up to her dorm and began throwing quills, ink and books into her book bag. Through the corridors she raced on her way to Defense Against the Dark Arts.

She had been dreading this class every since she had learned that their new Professor for it would indeed not be a new professor to the school, instead it would be by Gryffindor standards the worst professor in the school. Severus Snape.

How could she have managed to be late for Snape's class? She fumed to herself as she rounded the last corner. Knowing full well she was going to have a minimum of a month's detention for this she briefly considered turning around and heading up to bed. If she was going to suffer detention either way why not get the full satisfaction of not having to attend the class at all. Her conscience clicked in at this time and she continued on her way to class.

Now she could see the door, each step was carrying her closer to her doom…or at least humiliation. She was right. When she opened the door it creaked loudly and everyone's head spun around. Hermione scanned the room trying to find Harry and Ron so she could go sit with them. To her dismay she saw that Neville was occupying the third seat. Cursing under her breath as Ron and Harry each threw her an apologetic look she eagerly searched for the closest empty seat to sit in. Hopefully then people would turn their stare's away from her. To her horror she couldn't see any empty seats. Taking that dreaded but necessary look she glanced up to the front of the room to see why the person that usually had so much to say about her wrongdoing was staying silent. A smirk was plastered across his face, just like his oily mop of hair was to his scalp.

"We would all appreciate it if you would stop playing attention grabber and find a seat," he said coolly.

Still she could not see a seat so she helplessly said, "Where?" humiliated and upset she fought back the tears. No crying was not going to solve anything. In fact it would make things much worse. Snape would probably give her a week's detention for just getting his precious floors wet.

"On a chair how about?"

One side of the classroom roared with laughter, the other glared.

"Hermione over here," someone called. It was Lavender Brown. Relief washed over Hermione and she made her way over to sit beside her dorm mate. As she was placing her bag against the table leg to support it Snape said, "No I don't think that will do. You show up late and interrupt my class so I don't believe it to be fair that you get the same privileges as the ones that somehow find it in their capability to make it here on time. Nott move over one seat.

Hermione's head spun and she let out a groan. Nott was moving one seat to the right leaving one seat open between him and one white blond Slytherin. Neither of the Slytherin's protested which seemed strange to Hermione, then again the whole house worshiped Snape so why would they question anything he said.

"Anytime now would be nice," Snape said.

"I'm quite fine here," Hermione managed to say from her place beside Lavender.

"Yeah what difference does it make," Ron bellowed.

"Detention Weasley, 7 tonight," Snape said without even turning his attention from Hermione's post.

Ron began to protest but Snape fired back with, "Do you want to make it a week's worth?"

His ears went bright red as they often did when he was embarrassed but he kept his mouth closed.

Not wanting to cause anymore pain to her friends she grabbed her bag and stormed over to the other empty seat in the classroom. Slamming her bag down on the table and then pulling out her chair and flopping into it she was not happy. To make matters worse Malfoy turned his head in her direction and said, "Get lost? After all your time here you'd think you'd be able to remember how to get to class. Seeing as it's your favorite thing to do beside's hiding out in the dark with your two boyfriends."

"Malfoy you know what?"

"Does it look like I really want to know?"

"Yeah, shut that ugly trap of yours."

Their argument was broken up by Snape resuming the lesson.

Throughout the rest of class Hermione tried to not turn her head to the left. She didn't think she'd be able to control herself if she saw that smirk of his one more time.

By the time class ended Hermione could hardly control her emotions. What she needed now was something to throw hard-at Snape's head. She chuckled lightly at the mere thought of it. Wouldn't that just be wonderful?

She raced out the door before most people had even left their seats. Having 10 minutes between classes she wanted to get something to eat. Luckily she was only 2 staircases and away from the kitchen.

In the kitchen she hurriedly asked for whatever was closest at hand. She really didn't want to be late for her next class. Transfiguration. McGonagoll was strict and would certainly give her detention. Wait a minute, why didn't Snape give her one? Ron received one but she never did. Something was up.

Racing off to Transfiguration she made it in plenty of time. She made her way to her usual seat and sat down and waited. Minutes later Ron and Harry appeared in the doorway. Both talking animatedly and laughing. When they saw Hermione they rushed to her side and sat down.

"Where were you?" they both asked.

"I fell asleep," she replied.

"What? Why?"

"Because everyone talked all night and I was exhausted. I went out to the lake and fell asleep."

"You're kidding?"

"He didn't give you detention," Harry marveled.

"I know, something's weird he usually never hesitates to give any of us detention."

"Well sitting next to Malfoy is probably worse than any detention you could have."

"No kidding."

McGonagall walked in and the class fell silent. Harry shot Hermione a look that said, this discussion is not over by any means.

The rest of the day went by slowly. Thankfully Ginny was waiting for Hermione as she wandered into the common room.

"Hey," Hermione replied meekly as she flopped onto the couch beside Ginny.

"Come on let's talk somewhere more private," Ginny said as she scanned that noisy common room. There was absolutely no privacy there, "I'm thinking the room of requirement will work."

"Aww Ginny, I have so much homework to do and I'm absolutely exhausted," Hermione complained.

"And mad as hell so come on you need to vent," she grabbed Hermione's arm and pulled her to her feet. Once on her feet Hermione agreed. They set off through the near empty corridors to get to their destination. A chill had risen throughout the castle as they were walking and both girls hugged theirs arms to their bodies in an attempt to keep warm. It was not helping much. As they walked three times in front of the hidden door Hermione imagined a room with a roaring fire and plenty of soft blankets and pillows to cuddle into. Ginny thought of warm, moist chocolate chip cookies and cocoa. Chocolate always made her feel better and she was pretty sure it would work on Hermione as well.

When the door appeared the two girls stepped into a small room. The air was very warm and stuffy, but the good kind of stuffy. The one you get from a burning wood. On the floor was Hermione's large pile of pillows that she nestled into. Ginny sat down beside her and offered her the plate of cookies and one of the mugs of steaming cocoa.

"Mmm thanks Ginny," Hermione moaned in delight when she tasted the warm treats, "Thanks for dragging me here."

They sat in silence as they finished eating. Only when they were done and the hot liquid and heavy mug was out of Hermione's reach did Ginny nudge Hermione to begin, "So was the rest of your day better than this morning?"

"Of course not. All I could think of was the dirty smirk on his face as I sat down beside him and Snape's growl. How could I have inflicted this upon myself? That was so stupid to fall asleep out there. And you know the worst part of it?"

"What?'

"I contemplated skipping the whole class as I was rushing through the corridors but I told myself no Hermione you have to go to class. If I had only went up to bed tomorrow I could have went and found a good seat. Argh, he bugs me so much. Why can't he just keep his nose out of everyone's business and…and…I wish I was Harry or Ron, they don't hesitate to curse him. Me I tell them to put their wands away he isn't worth it. Why haven't I let them do it? They've been wanting to do it for years now and I should have let them. Hell I should have done it. Why haven't I?'

Ginny pondered the question for a few minutes and an antsy Hermione twirled her hair around her finger. Her hair wasn't as bad as it used to be she had to admit, but it still wasn't anything great. She had lost some of the bushy, frizzyness a few years before after she stopped sleeping with it up in a pony tail. Apparently that split her ends and tore her hair. Now her hair was pretty plain. It wouldn't do much.

"Do you really want to know the truth?" Ginny asked.

Hermione could tell that Ginny was itching to spread her ideas so she agreed.

"You use your mind to get to him. You think out your attacks. Harry and Ron act on impulse and what they do best is throw curses. You although you are amazing with your wand you have something that they don't have. The ability to think what is going to hurt them the most. How can I attack them, tear them down without laying a hand on them? You're ruthless when it comes to him and from what I've seen your way works. It hurts him. Makes him think. You beat him at his own game and maybe you don't realize it because when he says something to Ron or Harry you take it as an attack on yourself, but from the outside one can tell that he doesn't provoke personally like he used to. You walk by and he will taunt the guys but not you."

"He did though in class when I sat down. He asked me…"

"Hermione he wants to get a rise out of you. He knows you will retaliate. It's a game to him. You may hate me but I'm going to be completely honest with you here. This is what I believe and I know before I even begin that you're going to shoot this theory down, but only because you are in the situation. Sometime you need an outsider's opinion."

"What then?"

"He wants you Hermione-"

"What?" she screamed as she leapt to her feet. You're kidding me. Him…me?" she shook her head in disgust.

"Just listen. You're the girl that everyone tells him he can't have. Who else is the complete opposite of him but also exactly the same? Who can stand up to him, fight hand to hand with him, head to head? You are the only one who can. You know how he plays and you spin it around and throw it back at him. Curses don't bother him and you know that. What gets him is words. Only somebody that knows the other well would be able to do that. You are so much like him it's scary. The only thing that has kept you apart is the fact that you're a muggleborn."

"And he's a Slytherin and I'm a Gryffindor. That's the biggest difference trumps anything that makes us alike," Hermione added.

"Hermione," Ginny shook her head, "This whole Slytherin, Gryffindor thing is insane. Both houses are exactly the same, just like you and Malfoy. Both are strong minded. Will fight for what they believe in even if it means the death of them."

"But they're evil and we're not."

"For somebody so bloody brilliant you're stupid," Ginny seethed.

That shut Hermione up, she had never been called stupid before.

"Just think about it. Good and evil are just want somebody believes. To them we're the evil ones. They believe that purebloods are the only wizards. We believe muggleborns can be. Who's to say that they aren't the right ones here? Every war each side believes the other ones are doing something horrible and they are doing the right thing. To us the Death Eater's are murderers. They go and kill our side. Like Sirius. To us they killed an innocent man. To them they killed somebody who was standing in the way of their freedoms. When we kill one of them we do it because they are standing in the way of our freedoms but really aren't we just as much as a murderer as them? It's a vicious circle and all we're doing is being selfish basically. If only everyone could accept other's ideas. Death Eaters believe that Dumbledore is what Voldemort is to us. We're only the good side because we tell ourselves that. Put yourselves in their shoes."

"What does this have to do with anything? And how long have you been waiting to say this? It sure sounds like it's been pent up for awhile?"

"For as long as I've known about Voldemort. Hermione you and Malfoy are brilliant. Exactly the same. Both as strong minded and stubborn as they get. Give it a chance. Maybe something great will come out of it."

"I can't Ginny. We hate each other."

"You can't hate someone you don't know. Hate stems from a thorough understanding of the other person. Love and hate are like good and evil, the same thing."

"Wow, you just talked about so much."

"Yeah," she took a minute and then began to laugh, "Wow I should be a philosopher. Ha."

Both girls giggled about it for awhile and then fell back into a serious mood.

"So you really think he's got something for me?"

"Of Course," she said confidently.

"Really?" she poundered it for a minute and then said, "Hermione and Draco, Draco and Hermione."

Ginny laughed, she couldn't believe that Hermione was taking this so well. She had half expected to be slugged by her when she first mentioned it.

"So really all the hate I feel for him could actually be-" she couldn't finish that sentence it was just too weird.

"What you feel is passion for him. Good or bad passion does it really matter?"

"No I guess not, its still passion. You know Ginny sometimes you scare me."

"I scare myself sometimes."

"Wow, I still can't believe this. Gin what should I do?"

"Be yourself. You both have calmed down a lot of the years. No longer are you at each others throats. I think just let fate take it's coarse and you go along for the ride and everything will work out. I'm pretty sure you're meant to be together."

"I'm…I don't think I'll change fate then."

Ginny nodded and stood up, "So you have homework? You look exhausted."

"Really you just noticed?"

Both girls headed back up to the Gryffindor Common Room. As Hermione did her homework her mind kept spinning. It was hard to concentrate on the parchment but she knew that the sooner she finished the more sleep she would get. It turned out sleep was not on her agenda again for the night. When she crawled into bed she couldn't stop thinking about what Ginny had said. It was a lot to think about and somehow Ginny had compressed a lot into not many words. Maybe Ginny was the brilliant one in the friendship and not her. As her eyes were closing she mentally kicked herself. How had she not seen this coming? Of course she and Malfoy were perfect for each other. It had just taken her someone else to point it out to her first before she could fully grasp it. She went to sleep with thoughts of her and Malfoy over the years. The more she thought about it the more it made sense.

In third year Malfoy was attacked by Buckbeak. She had nervously asked if he would be all right. Why should she have cared? She didn't like him.

At the Quidditch World Cup Malfoy had warned her to keep moving so the Death Eaters didn't get her. He was not on their side so why would he warn her?

While at the Yule Ball when she had made her appearance Malfoy had been speechless when she had walked by. Really he usually took any opportunity to insult her and then would have been the perfect time.

Whenever Malfoy bothered Harry, Ron and her, the boy's demands for him to leave went upon closed ears. Instead when she told him something he listened and would leave them alone.

As her brain processed everything she couldn't help but agree more and more with Ginny. Both of them had some sort of feelings for each other.

When she totaled up everything that she had done at Hogwarts a lot of it had involved one blond Slytherin. Even when he wasn't involved in what they were doing she still managed to think about him.

Man this was getting complicated. Who could have for scene that she was falling in love over all those years. Harry and Ron were going to kill her.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n Did that make sense. Sometimes what makes sense in my head doesn't when I eventually start writing. Ginny's spiel is something that I've been thinking about for a long time now and I wanted to find a way to get that out. Was it too confusing? I'd really love your input here because I really don't know what to think. Maybe it was amazing or maybe it was utterly horrible but that's for you to tell me. So reviews, reviews, reviews would be absolutely wonderful. Thank you and remember reviews motivate me to write quicker and that means quicker updates.

BTW…To the people that are reading my other stories no I haven't forgotten about them. Sometimes I find starting a new story get's me out of my writers block and then I get ideas for my other stories as well. Sorry though about no updates in awhile. School ended and then I was away and recently I started my new job so I haven't had much time to write. Bear with me though. Thanks.


	2. Plans

As September turned into October Hermione tried to push what Ginny had said to the back of mind. If only she could forget about it than maybe it wasn't true. As long as she was thinking about she would also have a nagging feeling that she should be doing something about it. Many things were holding her back from running across the crowded Entrance Hall and proclaiming that they were perfect for each other. The main one being fear, the second one being she knew she wasn't stupid. Who was to say that Ginny had been wrong and just trying to make a fool out of her so called best friend? Hermione would become the laughing stock of Gryffindor and Slytherin, and Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw for that matter. Along side with not talking to Malfoy she had never told Ron and Harry about Ginny's theory. Something's were just best left untold.

The reason for this was Hermione had a distressing feeling that Ron was finally sorting out his feelings for her. She'd fancied him for quite some time between second year and fifth year. It had been one of those crushes that she couldn't let go of. As much as she knew it wouldn't go anywhere she still held on. Refusing to sever the last tie. Other crushes came and went but her one with Ron was different, it made her heart ache when she thought about it. On to many occasions to count she had cried herself to sleep. Her dorm mate's oblivious to her pain thanks to Hermione's skill had performing silencing charms. At the end of fifth year she had finally been able to let go. Not much, but a bit. As the summer wore on she found herself thinking of him less and less as a romantic interest and more as a friend. Exactly what he thought himself to be. Now that he was sorting out his feelings she didn't know what to think. Sure he was immature and…or did she only believe that because that's what she'd repeated over and over to herself as she tried to fall asleep. Had she said it so much that she finally began to believe it to be true?

When Ginny had first informed Hermione about Ron finally getting his act together Hermione had become confused. Was she supposed to go and resume her crush like her heart told her to do and get hurt again or was she plead indifference like her brain was screaming and permanently step away from what had to be only a school girl crush.

Defense Against the Dark Art's had turned into a useless course. That wasn't saying that the previous year had been any help to any of the students at Hogwarts. Snape refused to teach them anything useful and even if it was Lupin teaching again Hermione didn't think she'd even like the class. There was something so depressing about having to sit next to Malfoy. After his few curt words at the beginning of class on the first day he hadn't said one word to her. Instead he'd look right through her and talk to Nott. They never exchanged any forced pleasantries when arranging their books after arriving in class nor when they were leaving. He acted as if she didn't exist and before that was only something she would have dreamed about. Now it irked her.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

When Snape had ordered a shock and upset Granger to sit beside him permanently Draco had instantly been annoyed. How was he and Nott supposed to trash the Gryffindor Quidditch team after they beat them with their golden girl sitting between them. Anger quickly overcame annoyance as she sat their beside him so prissily. When he taunted her she fired back with a lame come back which wasn't her sorts. He knew that she was mad at somebody other than him at this time because never had she failed to snap intelligently back at him. Instead she had taken his bait just as Potter or Weasley did. That had surprised him.

As the first month of school flashed past October started in a strange way. Unexpectedly after one tough Defense Class Draco's emotions got the better of him. Blaise and Nott were walking with him down the corridor on their way to Transfiguration when out of nowhere he started fuming.

"I can't believe that bitch. Who does she think she is? Who?" when nobody answered him his anger grew as well as his voice. By now his voice was echoing down the corridor.

"Hey man, cool it. Do you want to look like somebody that should be in the psych ward at Mungo's?"

That didn't help at all so with a quick concerned look at each other his two friends took matters into their own hands. Each of them grabbed an elbow and dragged Draco into the nearest empty classroom. What they didn't see that amidst all the people staring at them was the one person that they had been hoping didn't hear their friends rant. Hermione had been walking out of the classroom at the exact moment that Draco had started ragging.

Once safely inside the classroom away from prying eyes and ears Blaise and Nott let go of the fighting Draco and let him get rid of his anger.

"She's so prim and proper and such a know it all little bookworm but then she goes and pulls a fast one on you and it plays with your head."

He continued on until he collapsed into a nearby chair exhausted.

"I can see that we won't be in Transfiguration today," Nott chuckled.

Draco glared at him and silence quickly followed.

"You know what I think you need to do mate," Blaise suggested.

"What?" Draco growled. Although he hoped his friend had a worthwhile suggestion it was most likely false hope. Never had anybody given him any advice worth half a knut.

"Fuck her."

"That's what I've been trying to do but she won't leave my head. I keep telling myself fuck it, fuck everything but it doesn't work."

"No what I think he means is literally fuck her," Nott cut in, "shag her…you know, do what Draco Malfoy does best."

"Yeah I think you're suffering from some intense sexual frustration."

"Really?" Draco asked confused, "But she's the Gryffindor bitch how will I do that?"

"I don't know," Blaise threw up his hands. He had suspected that his so called friend wouldn't take the suggestion kindly. It had shocked him when he hadn't been cursed. What he had never expected was to have Malfoy asking him how to catch and reel in a girl, "Do it like you do all the others. Needless to say that works."

"Yeah it does doesn't it," Draco replied cockily but then his mood dipped again, "But she's not like the other ones. She's so sure of herself and she's anything but insecure. She's not going to fall for it."

"Argh," Nott exclaimed, "How hard is it for Malfoy to bed a girl. My god. I'm starting to think that all his stories are exactly that stories and he hasn't done anything," he waved his hand in front of Malfoy's eyes and knocked on his forehead, "hello virgin boy."

"Shut it," Malfoy growled, "I never said I couldn't do it. All I'm saying is that is it really going to be worth my time? How long is it going to take? She doesn't trust me to begin with so instead of having her fall all over me and believing every word I say first I'm going to have to build up her trust and confidence. This is going to take to long and in the time it'll take I could get so many other girls."

"What other girls? According to you, you've done them all and want to move onto the bigger pond."

"Well…besides…"

"You couldn't get her and you know it. She's to much of a virgin and a goody two shoes. She's the only one who can resist the allure of Draco Malfoy and you know it."

"Fine I'll do it," there was nothing like a challenge to get Draco to do something. As good of a manipulator as he was his mates knew how to play him, "You think she's a virgin?"

"Hell yeah. What else could she be?"

"Well she could always be banging those two dimwits…together I mean."

The trio roared with laughter, "Yeah good point there."

"So what's you're plan of attack?" Nott asked solemnly.

"Trust and then I'm hoping I can get her to cave. Why do you have a better idea?"

"Yeah it's called rape but that's illegal."

"Only in the eyes of the victim my friend," Draco said seriously.

"Yeah and that's only one half of the people involved so the classification of it is split 50/50. Rape or not rape," Blaise concluded.

"Let's get out of here," Draco said as he headed for the door, "Empty classrooms give me the creeps. They should only be used for one thing."

"And let me guess those one things are all playing with you're head right now?" Blaise said as he walked out of the classroom with Nott following closely on his tale.

"I never said that. You're going to get yourself in a lot of trouble if you only assume things."

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Hermione had laid her books down at her desk in Transfiguration and then decided to make a quick dash for the washroom. Her bladder had been screaming at her throughout the last class from all the juice she had drunk at breakfast.

On her way out the door into the crowded corridor she heard his voice. It rose above the mindless chatter and cut right to everyone's ears.

"That bitch, who does she think she is?" he continued to rant until his entourage shushed him and dragged him away into a deserted room. Suddenly her need to relieve herself wasn't as strong as her need to find and talk to Ginny. She needed answers and she needed them now.

Hurrying through the corridors between classes meant you were walking a just a slower than normal pace. The swarms of people were not the forgiving and you could push all you want but most of the time you never got through. Luckily Hermione knew which class Ginny was in and what was even luckier was it was on the same floor as the Transfiguration room.

The door was open to the classroom and so Hermione stuck her head inside. Ginny was sitting in the back with a few of her dorm mates. Hermione called out and when Ginny saw who it was that had called to her she quickly excused herself and made her way through the rows of desks to get to her older friend.

"What's up?" Ginny asked, Hermione seemed tense.

"I need to talk to you," Hermione said. She was close to tears and Ginny had rarely seen her cry. The last time being over Ron and it hadn't been a pretty affair. She had been a mess for hours and it took half an hour to stop the flow of tears.

"I'll get my stuff and then we'll go upstairs."

"My stuff's in McGonagall's room. I can't just leave it there."

"Fine I'll go upstairs. You go and get your stuff and tell McGonagall that you have girl problems. She has to understand. She may not like it but she can't hold you in class. You look pale enough not to be feeling good. Go!"

Hermione obliged. Ten minutes later she was walking into the deserted Gryffindor Common Room. McGonagall had looked at her awkwardly at first and told her she should go see Madame Pomfrey. Hermione had rebuked with telling her that it was nothing lying down couldn't fix. Unwillingly McGonagall had given in. Meanwhile Harry and Ron were shooting questioning looks at Hermione who refused to make eye contact with them. If she did she feared she would break down in front of the whole class. Thank goodness she noticed that three such Slytherin's seats were vacant. That helped a bit, not much though.

Back in the common room Ginny was lounging on the couch with her back lying open on the coffee table. As Hermione walked over to her the portrait hole opened again and in walked three giggling fourth years. When they saw Hermione and Ginny a brief look of fear crossed their faces because they had just run into two prefects while skipping class and they went quite. Then the taller of the three nudged the black haired girl to her right and they started chatting as they headed up to their dorms.

"Let's go upstairs," Ginny said, "We don't want to get interrupted again."

She led the way and Hermione followed close behind her.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

McGonagall had just assigned the homework to her sixth year class and then she slipped out the door.

Once the coast was clear the class erupted into quite chatter as they began to work on their assignments.

"Something's up with Hermione," Harry remarked.

"No kidding," Ron responded.

"Do you have any idea?"

"No and Gin won't tell me anything. She said it's none of my business. She's been strange since the start of the year and she's been avoiding us."

"No really I didn't notice," Harry said sarcastically, "We've hardly seen her outside of class. She and Ginny are always together or she's nowhere to be seen."

"Maybe if you try with Ginny you'll get an answer. I'm just her brother she's not going to tell me anything. Maybe you could ask her out while you're talking."

"Ron," Harry sighed.

Nobody saw McGonagall walk back in at this time. The buzz of everyone's voice floated throughout the room as McGonagall sat down at her desk to grade some papers from her younger students. As a precedent she tried to not allow chatter during class. Although with her NEWT's classes she was a bit slack sometimes. They were all there because they wanted to be and they got their work down even while they talked quietly with their neighbors.

"Ron," Harry sighed, "Ginny and I wouldn't be good together."

"Why not, she's crazy for you. Has been ever since you came to visit after first year."

"She was eleven then."

"Yeah will if she felt that strongly that she would stick her elbow in butter then she most defiantly still cares."

"Oh so now you're Mr. Matchmaker are you? Why not play matchmaker with yourself and Hermione huh?"

Ron's ears went red and he closed his mouth, swallowing his words. They would only dig him a deeper hole.

"Exactly," now if you asked her out then maybe you could get her to talk to you and then we wouldn't have to go through me and Ginny. How does that sound to you?"

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

They decided to go into the sixth year girl's dorm. After a brief but thorough check to make sure nobody was their to over hear Ginny sat down beside her anguished friend.

"Talk to me," she prodded gently.

"Ginny ever since we talked last month all I can think of his him. I'm falling for him because I know have a false image of what he's like in my head. I convinced myself that he wasn't as bad as I thought but I was dead wrong. He's way worse than what I ever thought."

"What happened today?"

It didn't take much for her to spill the events of the past half hour. When she was done Ginny pulled her towards her and gave her a hug.

"The worst part is why do I even care? I've been called by countless people horrible things and I never feel a thing. Why now?"

"Hermione you've built a wall and a wall as much as it is strong it is not foolproof. Sometimes they break and sometimes the things you don't want to deal with get in and why it hurts so much is because in such a short time you've fallen for him. Look on the bright side at least you're over Ron."

"Yeah stupid Ron," Hermione managed to choke out but then it brought a fresh wave of tears because as much as she tried she knew it was going to take a lot to get over Ron and nothing would make her forget all the heartache caused.

After Hermione had pulled herself together her and Ginny had discussed how stupid guys were. Then Hermione had swung the discussion away from herself and to Ginny's crush.

"Make him jealous," Hermione said simply.

"He doesn't get jealous, I've already thought of that," Ginny said in defeat. It didn't look like she'd ever be able to snag the guy of her dreams. Maybe like Hermione was with Ron she'd have to settle and make do with someone else.

"Every guy get's jealous. You just have to plan it out and execute it flawlessly. Without a doubt you'll have him ready to throttle the other guy."

"We are one crazy pair. If only we'd listen to our own advice things would be so much easier."

"No kidding, but it doesn't work that way does it?"

"No way, things would be too easy. Beside's we wouldn't be able to have a great day like this. Sitting here, skipping class and tearing apart our lack of love lives."

"Amen to that," Hermione concluded and how true it was. What were friends for? Life would be no fun if you didn't have to sit hiding and making plans to manipulate your crush into falling for you.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n well as always please review. Thanks for the great reviews last time and please keep them up. I love reading what you guys think. Thank you. BTW aren't you guy's proud. I am…two chapters that are around 3000 words. That's very rare for me? I guess I just really enjoy this story and I hope you do as well.


	3. Conversations

One…two…three…, one…two…three…, Draco counted off his steps as he paced back and forth in his empty dorm. Every one else was out enjoying the breaking in the blistery fall weather but he was stuck inside. He'd made a promise with himself that he could go outside when he figured out what he was going to do. That was 897 paces ago and he still didn't have anything.

This was not like his usual missions. They all had been easy. Easy come and easy go. With Granger things were different. She held herself at a higher level then most other girls her age. Before he believed that to be a bad thing. Now he believed it to be even worse. It made his job very difficult. In a way he respected her though. How could you not? She didn't go and throw herself at people. She demanded respect instead and when she didn't get it she didn't associate herself with those people. It would take her far in life. She was more like a Slytherin than she would have liked to admit.

Thinking of that Draco began to wonder why she was indeed in Gryffindor. All of the strong traits she processed were more like a Slytherin's than a Gryffindors. Except she was muggleborn, but that shouldn't really have much to do with it. After all the Dark Lord was a half blood so blood purity obviously didn't influence everything. It finally hit him. The one trait that separated Granger from the Slytherins was her self sacrifice. A Slytherin wouldn't do anything if it meant risking their own neck. On the other hand Granger had done that many times for her friends.

His mind began to wander away from the task at hand and towards another task. One that defenantly was a life or death situation. Draco knew it was a death sentence, a punishment handed down to him for something he had never done. If he didn't succeed he would be tortured and made an example of to everyone else. If he did succeed it wouldn't be his allies that were after him, but the enemies. It was a lose, lose situation and he had little hope of making it out alive.

Tearing his thoughts away from such an depressing subject he once again began to plot on how he was going to get Granger to trust him. It wouldn't be easy that was for sure.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Harry sidled up beside Hermione and Ron sandwiched her in on the other side as they were walking down the corridors.

"Hermione," Harry began tentatively, he didn't know what her reaction was going to be.

"What?"

"Well I was thinking strange is going on. I've been noticing Malfoy hanging around the corridors by the room of requirement quite regularly…"

"Harry if you've seen him there that much, you've had to be there as well. Who's to say that he doesn't think you're up to something," she said with a deep sigh. She'd always been the one who shot down their theories. Always Ron and Harry believed Malfoy was up to something and he never was. The chamber of secrets was a prime example. It was just their hate trying to get out.

"Why are you always so stuck on saying that he's doing nothing wrong? His family's in league with Voldemort, Hermione. Voldemort!"

A group of 3 year girl's glared at Harry as they walked by. No one liked hearing that name being spoken out loud.

"Let it go Harry, he's done nothing wrong," Hermione stopped suddenly and the two boys walked a couple more steps before realizing that she wasn't between them anymore.

"Hey," Ron exclaimed, "Why are we stopping, I'm hungry?"

"I'll see you guys later," Hermione huffed. She disappeared down the nearest corridor leaving Ron and Harry confused. She was defenantly not acting like she normally did, she never spent any time with them anymore.

"Do you think she's seeing someone?" Ron asked nervously, he had been planning on revealing his feelings for her, he figured he'd finally worked up the confidence to do so.

"I don't know mate. She's not herself, she keeps running away and vanishing for long periods of time."

"So you think it's possible."

"I think it's more than possible."

"Why wouldn't she tell us?" Ron fumed, "She tells us everything."

Harry shot him a look that clearly said are you an idiot? Ron blushed when he finally realized what he said, "Of course she wouldn't, if it was somebody we didn't like."

Ron was finally getting it, "But who could it be? I think it's time you get into the secret telling time with Ginny."

"I'm not asking her out just to get her to talk about Hermione behind her back. If Hermione wants to tell us she can."

"You really believe that?"

"Well…no, but that's not the point."

"Ask Ginny."

"I'll ask her when I want to."

"Ask her."

"No."

"Do it!"

"Okay, okay I will but it has no link to Hermione. I'm only doing it because I've been planning to for some time now."

"Sure."

"I'm leaving now."

"Good."

"Good."

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Hermione wandered around aimlessly for awhile before deciding it was time for her to return to the Common Room. By now everything should have cooled off enough that she could have a civil conversation with people. Or not she realized as she walked into the Common Room. There on the sofa with a girl curled in his lap and tongue down his throat was her new worst nightmare.

The tears threatened to overflow and her brain was screaming at her. It took all her strength to hold her arm down. If she slipped her wand would be in her hand in a matter of only a few seconds. The only thing that kept her from crying was the few words she began to chant over and over again in her head. He wasn't mine, we're just friends.

She needed to get out of there. She had thought she'd gotten over him, well that was evidently bull. Sitting on the bottom stair of the girl's staircase was a disgusted looking Ginny. Hermione willed her feet to move and incredibly they did. It didn't feel like her though. It felt as if she was surrounded by a thick haze. The loud voices of the common room seemed as if they were a hundred miles away in a tunnel and her sight shifted. Ginny grabbed her arm and thankfully pulled her up the stairs.

Ginny couldn't believe how bad Hermione was. She had expected the worst and apparently that wasn't enough. When she grabbed Hermione's hand it was cold as ice and lifeless. Her eyes were trained on absolutely nothing and glazed over.

It was going to be a rough few days. How could Ron be so stupid?

Hermione was shell shocked. Never had she felt such a powerful wave of emotions. It felt like the floor was crumbling beneath her and she was free falling with no ground in sight.

Once Ginny had Hermione upstairs, Hermione laid down on her bed limply and closed her eyes. Only when she had sunken into a restless sleep full of tossing and moaning did Ginny slip out of the room.

Down the stairs she stormed and over to the couch with the still entwined couple. With all her strength Ginny grabbed the back of the girls shirt and pulled her backwards.

"What the hell?' she screamed.

"Come on Ron, we need to talk," Ginny said, venom dripping from each of her words.

"Ginny now isn't the time."

"On the contrary I think it's the perfect time. Everyone's about to throw up its so disgusting watching you two sit here. Get a room. But even then that wouldn't be far enough away. Ron everyone in this room is 15 or older. There is 11 and 12 year old here. Are their parent's really going to want letters home asking questions or complaining. There's a line and you crossed it along time ago," she bellowed out. Everyone who had been trying their best to ignore the display was now watching Ginny with awe and appreciation tear a strip off of her brother, "Besides," she hissed quietly so only Ron could hear, "There's one person who this is hurting worse than anybody else."

With that she took off back upstairs to a wave of appreciatory cheers.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

The next morning Hermione woke up to find her sheets entangled around her. Her right leg had gone numb and once she was free of their constriction she shook it and cringed as the feeling of the blood rushing back to her foot sent stabbing pains throughout her leg. There were a few peaceful seconds before she remember what she'd observed the previous day.

"How long was I asleep?" she asked Ginny.

"Nearly 17 hours."

"Really?"

Ginny nodded glumly.

"Wow I won't need to sleep for the rest of my life," she tried to joke.

They fell into silence for a little bit before Ginny said, "What are you going to do?"

"Mope and cry about it?"

"You're kidding right?"

"No."

Ginny's eyes grew in disbelief.

"At night and by myself I mean. In public I won't give him the satisfaction of knowing he got to me. Revenge will be sweet though, especially with who I'm planning."

Ginny knew exactly what she meant.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

By the time Hermione felt like she'd gained the confidence to leave the dorm the day was on the later side of noon. What had taken her so long was the need to reason with herself that she was doing the right thing.

She walked down the stairs, the first few unsteadily in her borrowed heels. She'd traded in her knee socks for a pair of panty hose of Ginny's. She had to admit, the heeled pumps and panty hose's looked much better than her navy knee socks or tights with her scuffed Mary Jane's. Ginny had thought to polish her shoes and because of that they gleamed.

Amazingly only those few changes transformed her from a child to a woman.

Head's turned as she walked through the common room. Along with the shoe change she had also loosened off her tie and unbuttoned the top few buttons of her shirt today, exposing just enough skin to make people curious. Feigning over heating she'd draped her sweater over her arm and wore only her cloak which billowed out behind her.

She'd caught everyone's attention except for the one's she'd wanted. Frustrated but not letting it show she walked out through the portrait hole. Ginny wasn't far behind her and together they went for a stroll throughout the school to see who they could run into.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

As Monday rolled around Hermione stuck with her new fashions. She wanted to put the new her to the test. She walked into class with a few minutes left to spare and for the first time gladly walked over to her seat in the Slytherins area. Before leaving her dorm she'd rolled the waistband of her skirt in once, raising the hem just enough. Ginny's super push up bra was working wonders and Hermione had found cleavage that she didn't know existed. As she crossed the classroom she forced herself to keep her head forward. She did not want to see what she knew was happening just to her left. Ron sitting in the seat that Hermione had briefly sat in at the start of the year beside's Lavender Brown.

The Slytherin side of the room was empty as usual. They usually sauntered in as class was starting or just after and Snape never lifted his head or spoke one word to them. Hermione pulled out her chair and carefully sat down and crossed her legs. Her skirt was much shorter than she was used to.

As the classroom filled up Hermione thumbed through some scrap parchment she'd discovered at the bottom of her bag. If they were still in good shape she could reuse them for notes. They were.

She didn't look up when she heard the seat to her right being pulled backwards, nor when the one to her left was. Only after she heard the soft thump of him lowering himself into the chair did she give herself the satisfaction of glancing out of the corner of her eye. Her breath caught in her throat as she waited to see what would happen. Sure enough he glanced over in her direction as he did every day but this time he spun his head back quickly and did a once over. His eyes lingering on her chest. Bingo that was exactly what she'd hoped for. It was strange, usually when guy's eye's lingered she'd felt self conscience and angry, how dare they look at her? With him she felt proud. Could a new outfit do all that or was there something more to it?

"Did you cut you're hair Granger, something looks different?" he said gruffly. They were the most word's he'd said to her in weeks.

"No, but do you think I should?" it was a test and it could have devastating results or impressive ones.

"No you look good how it is?"

She'd been expecting the worst but those few words were better than her best wishes. Maybe this wouldn't be so hard.

"Thanks," she replied simply. There was no need to get overly thankful.

"No problem."

Wow it was almost a conversation. They were making progress.

No more words were exchanged throughout the rest of class or throughout the rest of the day. Hermione did know that his eyes lingered a second to long on her when he turned to talk to Nott.

The following day Hermione walked into class with higher expectations.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Draco walked into Defense and pulled out his chair and threw himself down into it. Another class with Granger. Every time he saw her he had to force himself to not look at her and to not think about her. It only angered him that he couldn't decide what to do about her. Nott had sat down in his seat and Draco decided to talk to him. While he was turning his head he noticed something different. He took a brief second look which began to drag on and on. He had to remind himself to keep his mouth closed for fear of his tongue rolling out. Wow! She looked good, really good. Who knew that she had it in her to wear something like that, or actually had the body to pull it off. Her uniform always looked like it was bought a size to big, but the one she was wearing now was anything but big. It was nearing the to small side of the spectrum. Her breasts were straining the upper buttons over her blouse. Man she did have a figure.

"Did you cut your hair?" he heard the words rolling off his tongue, but didn't remember deciding to say them. Hopefully he wasn't sounding like an idiot.

She replied and remarkably they exchanged a few more words between themselves. It wasn't much, testy at points but it was still something. He felt a new pull towards her and he knew that his body was now aching for her. Maybe if he let his hormones take over from his brain things would get done. Yes that sounded like a better idea, seeing as thinking things out had gotten him absolutely nowhere.

As the day wore own he found that he was thinking about her more than ever and wanting her desperately. He'd have to be patient but that was something he had never been good at. It was hard to be patient when all your life you could snap your fingers and have what you want handed to you on a silver, goblin made platter.

While sitting safely back in the dungeons after dinner Draco found that he was impatient for class to start tomorrow. Never had he been eager to attend class. It had always been one of those things that you just had to do.

He wanted to see if Granger had made her new outfit a one day only thing and he basically wanted to see her.

Draco slept restlessly and woke up every hour and then would stare at his clock until he fell back asleep. That went on until at 5 o'clock he decided to give up on sleep and head out into the common room.

Apparently the chair by the fire was more comfortable than his bed because as soon as he opened his book he felt his eyelid's drooping and then nothing. He woke up to a high pitched shriek from one of the annoying little runts. He was never having kids. How could people stand to be around them for eleven years before they shipped them off to school?

Wanting to make the most of his class time Draco rushed to Defense after breakfast and found himself to be the second one there. That was a first. He made his way over to his seat and sat down and waited. She walked in not that much after with Potter and they went their separate ways at the aisle. Again she looked different. Better. It was subtle but still noticeable. She'd tweaked her hair. It was now shinier and not as wild as it was previously. Once more it was an improvement.

"Morning," he heard himself say.

"Morning," she replied. Her voice sounded different as well. It sounded lighter, not weighted down by a lot of thoughts. It was most likely the voice she used with her friends. He was glad to hear it.

"Did you sleep well?" it was a start, not very creative but something still. He found that when he thought about what he would say he drew a blank. Best to take the chance and see what came out.

"Oh yes," she replied taken aback, "Yeah it was very pleasant, how about yourself?"

"Not to good, I had a lot of stuff on my mind."

"Well I'm sorry to hear that," she said and it almost seemed as if she really did care. Maybe she did?

"Yeah just having some problems with some people I know," he added.

Her voice changed at this point and it returned to the way he was used to, "Well then."

She turned away from him and began searching through her back. It was evident that she was not looking for anything, just doing something to make herself busy. What had happened, he thought they were doing so well?

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

In Defense more conversation had sprung when she first walked in. Hermione was surprised to discover that she didn't seem stressed out like she usually was when she was around Malfoy. They talked for a few minutes but then he said something that made her instantly cringe. For a moment she'd forgotten who she was talking to. They were just two people in class wasting time. With only a few words he'd reminded her what she was doing and how bad it was. He was the enemy, it didn't matter which way you looked at it. Maybe Harry and Ron's latest theory wasn't spot on but I was not far from the truth. It didn't matter how many civil conversations they could have, he was still a Malfoy and still in league with Voldemort. It didn't matter what Ginny told her otherwise. She could never forget the truth, it could cost her dearly one day. Fun was aloud, but you could never lose sight of what was really happening.

Was she doing the right thing? She asked herself and then instantly cursed herself for it. Of course she was. She trusted her instincts and that was good enough for her and her instincts were now telling her to dive head first into the pool without first testing the depth. She could always recover from an injury.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n thank you thank you thank you to the people that have reviewed. You guys are wonderful. Now that I'm done with that I'm going to ask for another 30 seconds of your time. You've already taken the time to read this chapter what's a little bit more time to tell me what you liked or didn't like or what I could do that would make it better. Flame's help me and you know what if something bothers you like using a word to many time (I know I do it) just point it out. Usually once I know somebody else has noticed it and it irks them I somehow don't seem to do it anymore. So please help me out here. Thanks.


	4. Reminders

Draco was walking through the corridors by himself which was an unusual occurrence. Usually he was flanked by at least two other people, the more the better it made him look powerful and everyone feared him. It was almost curfew and he only passed a few stragglers. Everyone of them walking quickly with their heads down praying they made it to their common room before curfew hit. Such scaredy-cats they were he couldn't help but think. Did they honestly believe that if they were a minute late something was going to jump out of the walls and swallow them up?

As the minutes ticked by Draco ran into less and less people. That's why he was surprised when he rounded the corner and saw the goody-two-shoed Granger strolling towards him. Her eyes flicked to his face and just as quickly they were back to their original position.

"Hey Granger," Draco said.

She nodded her head in recognition. It was a cold greeting, one that you'd give somebody that you knew but were trying to avoid.

"We need to talk."

"About what?" she managed to say.

Draco reached out and grabbed her arm and pulled her closer to him so he didn't have to yell, "That's better," he said. He was trusting his instincts here and his instincts were telling him to go for it. It was now or never.

He opened his mouth to begin talking to her but instantly swallowed his words. The look that she had in her eyes was different. Usually she was tense around him, her eyes had betrayed her this time. They were a lighter, more golden shade of brown. Impulsively his shook his head, why was he even thinking that, he was going crazy? Eye colours didn't change, or did they?

"I was just going to remind you to make sure you have that easy for Defense done. You seemed a bit side tracked in class today when he assigned it," at the last moment he had chickened out and went with the safety net, talking about school. Well really what else did they have in common?

A brief look of confusion flashed across her face and then it was promptly followed by a panicked expression, "What essay?" of course she hadn't heard, she'd been to busy trying to not see Ron and Lavender sitting side by side a few seats away. Also how did anyone expect her to concentrate with having the desk mate that she had?

Draco proceeded to tell her about their homework, all the while trying to hide his shock about how Granger had missed an assignment. It would have almost been worth it to not tell her and see her face tomorrow when she realized that she'd lost out on easy marks.

He finished his explanation and then there was an awkward silence. Neither of them knowing what to say.

"Well then," Hermione said breaking the silence.

"Yeah," Draco agreed.

"I guess I should get going," she sidestepped around him but stopped after only two steps and turned to face Draco again, "Thanks," she said kindly.

Draco's confidence soared, that one word had been laden with so much appreciation instead of it's usual hate.

"Hey no problem, any time."

Hermione nodded once and then set off at a quick pace. It took a second for it to hit him but when it did it hit him hard. Gryffindor Tower was in the opposite direction. What was Granger up to, wandering around-with a quick check of his watch-after curfew?

What Draco didn't know was that she was trying to run into him in hopes that something would come of it.

"Hey Granger," Draco called.

She stopped once again and slowly twisted just her head this time to see what he wanted.

"Gryffindor Tower's that way," he pointed her in the right direction.

A smile played on her lips and then it grew. It took all of his strengths to restrain himself from jumping up and down, wow a heart felted thanks and a smile all in a matter of minutes.

"The kitchens," she replied simply.

And he got a truthful reply from her. If this kept up he'd be through with her in a fortnight.

"Really?" he asked puzzled, "You know how to get in?" he'd always wondered how you got into the Hogwart's kitchens and where it was for that matter.

"Of course I know," she replied, "You don't?"

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

When Malfoy said he didn't know where the kitchen was she was stunned, she had always thought that if anybody other than the Weasley's, her and Harry knew it would Malfoy.

"Come on," she said offhandedly, she didn't know what influenced her decision but she knew it was the right one to make.

A smile danced across his face and he walked up beside her and they set off through the maze of corridors and staircases that would take them to the kitchens. They passed dozens of portraits along the way and the majority of the occupants glared at them. Whether it was for the civilly between two people from feuding houses or the fact that they were out after curfew, or both Draco and Hermione didn't know.

"Well here we are," Hermione exclaimed.

Malfoy looked blankly at the painting of the bowl of fruit and then looked to Hermione for conformation, "You're telling me that all the years that I've passed this painting I've been walking by the kitchens?"

"Yup, but may I ask what were you doing down here in the Hufflepuff neck of the woods?" there really wasn't a point to asking that question. She knew what his answer would be. She resolved that all she wanted to see was his reaction.

Malfoy smirked and said, "Think it through Granger," changing the subject he said, "So what's the password?"

"There isn't one," she replied simply.

"Oh no," he moaned, "You're not telling me that I have to do a jig or strip to my boxers to get in. I'm telling you if anybody's stripping it's you Granger."

"Haha very funny. You'd like that wouldn't you?" she went out on a limb again and asked the question.

Malfoy didn't say anything for a moment but then replied cockily, "Yeah who wouldn't?"

Hermione murmured something so quietly that the only reason he knew she said anything was because he saw her lips move. Maybe that wasn't the best thing to say. He hoped he hadn't taken one step forward tonight but then consequently fell two steps back. That was very likely how this was going to turn out.

"So what you do is tickle the pear."

"I beg your pardon?" he thought he heard her say you had to tickle the pear.

"Like this."

Much to his amazement she stretched her hand out and rubbed it along the pear in the painting. They stepped into the kitchen and Hermione couldn't help but stare at Malfoy's face. It was priceless the expression on it.

"It's not really much right? Your kitchen at home's probably twice this size," she said.

He didn't say anything but when he recovered his cool and ability to speak he replied with, "Yeah something like that."

They sat down on the nearest bench and gladly accepted two pieces of hot apple pie from an overly eager house elf. They dipped their forks into the dessert and mopped up the growing puddle of melted ice cream. They didn't speak as they savored the delightful taste of cinnamon and apples. After they'd mopped up everything off of their plates Hermione abruptly stood, "Well this has been interesting," she stumbled over her words. As much as she wanted to play it calm and cool her brain and mouth just didn't have that sort of connection. Apparently she was going to make a total ass out of herself, that's usually why she tried to avoid these situations.

"Yeah, interesting," he agreed.

"I've got to go," she spat it out in a rush. She grabbed the bag of goodies that the house elves had put together for her as they were eating and ran towards the door. Once she was safely out in the deserted corridor she let out her pent up breath. Wow, that seemed seriously like a date. They talked to each other and if it wasn't anything else they acted as if they were well friends.

She knew she wanted this to happen but was wanting something and picturing it in you head that much different than living it? She assumed so. The nagging voice in the back of her head, what she called her little voice of reason apparently took a short vacation in which time she managed to act as a normal teenage girl would act around the guy that she fancied. When that voice appeared again she'd panicked. She questioned her judgment and whether she was doing the right thing.

It didn't take her long to navigate the passages back to the common room. Once safely there she flopped down onto the coach beside Harry and Ginny but almost instantly leapt back up again. She remembered why she'd left in the first place. Both of them were working out their feelings for each other and she felt like a third wheel. Throwing the bag of treats onto her recently vacated spot she decided to head up to her dorm and work on the essay Malfoy told her about.

"Where are you going?" Ginny asked.

"Homework," Hermione replied briskly.

"I thought you said you were done?"

"I thought so too," Hermione grumbled. That had to be a first she complained about doing schoolwork.

"So you just remembered?" Ginny asked skeptically.

"No somebody reminded me," she shot Ginny a look that clearly said don't push it any further you know exactly who I'm talking about.

"What took you so long?" Harry asked.

"Malfoy," Hermione forced her voice to take on the angry tone that she usually used when talking about Malfoy. It was difficult, her head had finally begun to clear and she was ecstatic about how well the last half hour had gone.

"What'd he do?" Harry tried to jump to his feet but Ginny pushed him back down and silenced him with a look. It was if they were already an old married couple. It was about time they realized how perfect they were for each other.

"Nothing, it was strange. He just told me to make sure I had my Defense Essay done. It was almost as if he knew I'd forgotten to do it."

Ginny beamed from behind Harry's back, things were working out faster than she had anticipated.

"Well I'm going upstairs. Night," she waved to her two best friends and headed upstairs to do that dreaded essay.

She was halfway done her essay when Ginny walked into her dorm. Half of Hermione's dorm mates were in the process of getting ready for bed or reading while lying down. The rest were nowhere to be seen.

"Hey Hermione," Ginny sang, "Guess what?"

"Not now Ginny, I have to finish this because if I stop I'm not going to want to work on it again."

"Fine," Ginny huffed as she walked over to Hermione's trunk and began searching through it.

"Hermione," she whined again a few minutes later.

"Ginny not now."

Hermione's began scratching faster across the page and in half the time she finished her essay, "There what was it you wanted?" she wasn't happy with how the essay had turned out but then again she was never happy with her work and she still did exceptionally well on it. Hopefully this would be a repeat of that but with Snape marking it was very unlikely.

"You never told me you had anything like this," Ginny held up a red bra with matching panties. Hermione felt her face instantly go the colour of the lingerie that Ginny was waving around.

"Put those away," she hissed.

"Whatever," Ginny threw them back in Hermione's trunk but made sure they were on top, "but you're wearing them tomorrow."

"Ginny my blouse is white," Hermione moaned.

"So everyone else wear's a bright bra, I'm sick of you plain beige and white cotton ones."

"What did you want when you first came in here?" Hermione wanted to get this over with, she was tired and so were her dorm mates. She could tell because they were shooting her warning glances.

"Oh just to tell you that I'm the new girlfriend of…Harry Potter," she squealed.

"Really?!" to hell with the glares from the other girls. This was great news. The glares only intensified though they were being fired at a different person. It was no secret that every one of those girls had had a hope that they would be the one Harry Potter chose to have as his girlfriend.

"Well it's about time," Hermione said.

"You're telling me, I thought he was never going to get his act together," Ginny shook her head.

Hermione leaned in for a hug and Ginny giddy with excitement eagerly returned it. While their heads were beside each other Hermione whispered into Ginny's ear so only she could hear it, "Malfoy and I talked."

Now it was Ginny's turn to be surprised, "Like actually talked?"

"Well it was a conversation so yes with Malfoy that's actual talking."

"So that's what took you so long?"

Hermione nodded and she too was grinning, all of her woes about Ron and Lavender were forgotten, "I showed him where the kitchen was and then we had some apple pie," she was so giddy as she talked about it quietly with Ginny her whole body was almost shaking with excitement. The dorm had filled up and all the girls were now straining their ears to hear what Hermione and Ginny were saying. They could see lips moving but what they didn't realize was Hermione had performed a silencing spell while giving Ginny a hug making it look like they were only whispering.

"So what do you think? Could something more come of this?" Ginny asked expectantly.

"Ginny you're the expert here. I've never so much as…" she trailed off, she'd never admitted it before now to anyone, "never even kissed anyone. How sad is that I'm sixteen and never been kissed?"

Ginny forced herself to keep her mouth closed, she was shocked but that would only make Hermione feel worse. How could she have never been kissed it was such an amazing experience. Poor Hermione to have to have that on her mind she must feel like such a loser. Girls in her year had lost their virginity and there Hermione was not only a virgin but completely innocent, "What about Krum you said that he was just physical?"

Hermione shook her head and then flopped backwards, her head narrowly missing the headboard instead landing with a soft thump on her plump pillow.

"I don't even know how," Hermione moaned, "so whenever I eventually do get my first kiss I'm going to seem like such a loser because they'll be expecting something more than someone that's has as much experience as an eleven year old."

Discussing this brought up very unpleasant memories for Ginny. Her first kiss had indeed been when she was eleven. She had been a first year and it happened to be at one of the times that she wasn't being possessed by Riddle. For all the experiences that had happened that year why did one of the most unpleasant ones have to be one of the few that she remembered? It was during an intense game of truth or dare between her fellow Gryffindor First Years. She'd chosen dare and what a mistake that was. After that she resolved that she would always chose truth. Nobody would know you were lying. That only worked though until her third year when it was discovered that there was actually a charm that could be used to make sure the rules were followed correctly. Until then they had apparently been playing the muggle game of Truth or Dare.

"Aww Hermione," Ginny gave her upset a friend a hug but it did little to comfort the now distraught Hermione.

"And then if something further happens with Malfoy what will he say when he find's out I've never been kissed?"

"You mean if you date him?"

She nodded glumly.

"Don't tell him, I'm sure you can't be that bad that he'll know outright."

"I doubt it, I bet I'm the worst kisser in the world."

No, Ginny thought that title would go to the person she'd been dared to kiss.

"He won't let me live it down," she moaned.

Ginny was glad Hermione was good a silencing spells. How she knew it was good was from the looks of the girl's faces around them. They were angry that they couldn't hear why Hermione was holding back her tears. Rumors were being formed in every one of their heads.

"Hermione so much of it comes naturally. It's an instinct, a reflex. One somebody kisses you just wait a minute, get in the rhythm of it and if it's the right person your body will just know how to do it."

"You sure?"

"Positive."

Hermione didn't look like she completely trusted Ginny but she wanted desperately to so she let the topic drop. There was better things to talk about, her lack of love life should not be relevant when Ginny had just been asked out by her soul mate.

"I can't believe you aren't bouncing off the walls," Hermione exclaimed, "You must be so excited."

"Hermione it really hasn't sunk in. Maybe tomorrow I'll wake up and be excited but right now it just seems like a dream."

"Wait until you walk into the Great Hall together, you'll need a bullet proof vest."

"A what vest?" Ginny asked, not knowing what a bullet was.

"Sorry muggle body armor," she dismissed it with a wave of her hand. Sometimes it was quite difficult differentiating what was in her head with what her wizard friends would understand. It was even worse talking with her few muggle friends or relatives because unlike with classifying something as muggle and the wizards understanding she couldn't simply brush off saying wand or broomstick or flying broomsticks, it just didn't work so well.

Ginny cringed when she thought about how mad some girls were going to be with her. She knew already that it was going to be like she had stolen their boyfriend even though Harry had probably never even known half of their names.

"I'm so happy for you Gin."

"I'm happy for myself," Ginny said, she was starting to get excited and she loved that feeling.

"Now we just have to hope for my happy ending."

"It will come girl, don't fret it. You don't want to be with the wrong person and regret it. I've done my fair share of that, it's not pretty. Well I'm exhausted. Goodnight. Have some sweet," she wiggled her eyebrows and Hermione stifled a giggle, Ginny did that so well, "dreams about your Slytherin boy."

"Right back at you."

As Hermione shimmied under the quilt she thought, Ginny said that the being with the wrong person wasn't good, but how was she supposed to know who the right one was? Didn't she have to make mistakes before she knew how to succeed?

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n Sucky chapter I think. It didn't have the emotion in it that I wanted it to but then again when I sat down to right I had literally no idea what to put down. I knew where I wanted this story to go-that's a first for me I never plan out stories-but I just couldn't find a way to get it there. So I do apologize.

Anywho, please review. Thanks if you have. It's really good to wake up in the morning and see reviews in my inbox and when I return from work. I don't think it's an unreasonable request to ask for ask many reviews as I have people on story alert. Do you think so? Hint that's 10. Thanks again.


	5. Victory

The discussion that Hermione had with Ginny about kissing was something that danced through Hermione's mind continuously for the following fortnight. It became so bad at some points that she felt herself slipping away from reality and falling into a depression like state where nobody and nothing else mattered.

Harry and Ginny had been going strong for those two weeks which only tugged harder at Hermione's emotions. It didn't help that Ginny always had some story about how great Harry was. Sometimes she accidently slip out how hot and heavy they were without realizing it. Once she realized it she'd quickly cover her mouth and apologize profusely.

Not liking being depressed all the time Hermione decided that the one way she could make it stop would be to get kissed and so that's what she set out to do. She had the perfect idea.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

"Over here you dimwitted lumps of toadstool."

Yes it was another day of practice and of course it had to be teeming down rain and blowing a gale. The rain pummeled their faces and felt like ice chips. They probably were it was so cold out. It was almost impossible to keep their brooms steady but somehow everyone was managing. If only they hadn't lost that game to Hufflepuff. Hufflepuff! Now they had to beat Gryffindor by 180 points or they'd be out. Mind you their game against Gryffindor wasn't for another month and a half but as their captain had repeated so many times it was drilled into their brains, "In a month and a half can you imagine how bad you'll be after Christmas! You sucked out their against Hufflepuff."

The team spun their brooms in the opposite direction and flew or at least tried to fly in a straight line towards our captain. It didn't work out so well and they found themselves going very left. After a few more choice words they finally made it but although he was standing safely with two feet on the ground he told his team to hover 3 feet off the ground.

As everyone was bashed together they tried to concentrate on the orders that they were receiving. Draco couldn't concentrate. His hands were soaking wet and brittle from the cold. It was a miracle he was still on his broom. All the while his mind was hard at work, but not on a subject he wanted to be thinking about at the moment. How dare she not leave his head? Images of that pesky smile and beautiful eyes...ahhh.

Four inches of mud were what he landed in. A snickered rippled through the remaining 5 air born Slytherins as they saw the pompous Malfoy land on his back and have the wind knocked out of him. His broom lay lifeless underneath him.

"Get up Malfoy and back on that broomstick," the Captain yelled.

As much as he wanted to he couldn't. His head was swimming and he felt like he wanted to take and nice long nap. No that wouldn't work. Maybe he had concussion and didn't they say that you shouldn't fall asleep with a concussion. Or was it you should sleep through it and you'd wake up better? He didn't know but before he couldn't make his decision about what to do two pairs of strong arms hauled him to his feet. The rain instantly washed away any remnants of the mud.

"Okay change rooms men," he looked at his newest chaser, a scrawny second year and added, "boys."

A bolt of lighting wouldn't have beaten the team. Never had the scalding hot showers felt so good. Well maybe the day before and the day before that. They'd been practicing in this sort of weather for the past week and there was no sign of it changing. It was after all November. Their game against Gryffindor was set for the day before they left for Christmas Holidays.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Of course the castle woke up to a fresh layer of snow. Whether that was a good or bad thing depended on the team.

Hermione made her way through the throng of students trying to find the best seats in the stands. She bade farewell to Harry at the entrance to the changing rooms. To her dismay Ron and Lavender were there as well having a heartfelt goodbye. They tore apart with regret and Lavender spotted them. As Ron and Harry ventured inside together Lavender decided to cling onto her fellow Gryffindor and sit with Hermione. Apparently since she'd started dating Ron her friends hadn't been so kind towards her. It might have been the fact that she ignored them now but she would never admit that, she had to place the blame on them. Well Hermione had no plans of being kind to her either.

Lavender grumbled all the way up the wooden steps, "It's so cold out, why are we even out here? It would be much nicer up in the Common Room snuggled up to the fire."

Hermione tried to tune her out, she had to be thinking clearly for what she was about to do later. Then again maybe a bit of angst would help her out.

"Oh but we can't see the entrance to the pitch. I want to see Ronnykinns make his entrance," she cooed.

Hermione had sat down and to her horror realized how cold the bench was. Apparently all the rain they'd had over the past month had decided to pool on the benches until the temperature dropped and formed it into an ice slick. Otherwise it was a perfect spot in Hermione's opinion.

Lavender sat down beside Hermione and cuddled up to her for as she put it warmth. All Hermione wanted to do was scream out demanding, _'Do you know who I am?'_ It wouldn't have made a difference though because only Ginny truly knew Hermione's feelings after Ron. Therefore Hermione had to resolve to sit in silence.

The game began and from the beginning it was a battle of the seekers as everyone knew it would be. Harry and Malfoy, two people on the complete opposite end of the spectrum but just like her and Malfoy so much alike. Both had exceedingly good skill she noted as the battled it out high above the ground. She gasped and cheered at all the right places with everyone but her heart wasn't in it. She found herself being unable to tear her eyes away from the Slytherin Seeker and she sat on the edge of her seat when he'd go into a steep dive.

The game ended without Hermione really realizing what had happened. It was only when Lavender stood up beside her and grumbled, "I wasted my time on a loosing game."

"What?" Hermione found her voice again.

"Hello didn't you watch the game?" she waved her hands embarrassingly in front of Hermione's eyes as if to wake her up.

"Yeah so."

"They lost. Malfoy caught the snitch."

"I know," she did see Malfoy catch the snitch, that part wasn't hard to miss since her eyes hadn't waved from him the entire game. What surprised her was they lost. Gryffindor never lost to Slytherin. There had to be a mistake. The chasers always came through if Harry couldn't and secured them the game.

"And by 90 points that's quite a loss. Well got to go, I promised Ronny that I'd go out with him tonight no matter what happened, not that we expected this to. Poor guy he'll feel awful because it was his fault, he let so many shot go in. Oh well I'll just have to comfort him!" she skipped away and Hermione shook her head in disgust. What kind of girlfriend laid the blame directly on her boyfriend's shoulders? It wasn't only Ron's fault. Harry would be kicking himself worse than anybody else.

Hermione had her long woolen jacket on with the fur lining so up until this point she hadn't felt all that cold. There was a defenant chill before but now the wind was picking up again and the snow had started to fall. She grasped the coat tighter around her body as she carefully navigated the treacherous steps with the waves of disappointed students. A lot of people had been betting on Gryffindor and it was quite a shock to the system to see them loose that terribly.

Friends assembled around the doors to the Change Rooms and the rest of the crowds hurried back up to the castle for a hot lunch. Hermione hung back, she needed to observe everything before she set her plan into action. She laughed lightly as that thought went through her head. It sounded so cliché.

As she had though the Slytherin's were the first out. It was painfully obvious that there was a lecture going on in the disappointment ridden Gryffindor Change Room.

Soundlessly Hermione slipped away from the hovering students, what she was about to do she didn't want to do in front of everyone. She leaned up against a tree on the route back to the castle and waited. Not much later a horde of overly enthusiastic Slytherin's came waltzing up the grounds. In the middle of the pack his silver hair blending in with the snow causing it to be the rare moment that it didn't stand out was the person she'd been waiting for. To her horror she saw that he was surrounded by a group of giggling girls. Relief washed over her when she saw the unsatisfied look on his face. A smile flickered across his face when he saw her standing up the hill from him and it turned into a well faked frown when he told his entourage that he had to go.

The girls didn't move for a bit but once he waved them on the reluctantly continued on their way. Once he was in the clear he took a few large strides and was at her side.

"Hello," she said coolly.

"Afternoon," he replied. He knew that she had something to tell him, why else would she have positioned herself away from the crowds but where he was guaranteed to notice her?"

"Nice catch," she had seen it and thought it was pretty impressive.

"Thanks, why aren't you with your friends?"

She motioned with her head towards the back of the greenhouses and walked away. His feet matched her pace and they walked side by side until they were out of earshot and eyesight of their fellow students.

Hermione leaned up against the cold class of the greenhouse but she hardly felt it, her body was so hot from the rate her heart was pumping and the adrenalin that was surging through her veins. Was she really about to do this?

"I was thinking," she began. She never got to finish because his lips crashed down on hers and started kissing her furiously. At first she was to shocked to move, then shock turned into fear and finally into pleasure. As Ginny had said her body knew what to do even if her mind didn't. Her arms snacked their way up his back and coiled themselves around his neck and it was a good thing too because as she did that she felt her legs beginning to grow shaking. Wow. Her lips replied with a wave of desire and she kissed him back. Getting lost in the power of the kiss she lost her 'Little Voice of Reason.' It should have been their screaming at her to take it slowly but it wasn't. Thankfully he pulled away from her and wiped his mouth off.

"What were you about to say?" he asked.

"Oh nothing."

"Okay then well I'd better get going. They'll start to miss me and we wouldn't want a search party to find us here now would we?' he laughed and she gave a polite laugh as well but she didn't find it all that funny. She'd been kissed, had her first kiss and it was truly amazing, she wanted to jump up and down in glee. She couldn't believe it, she'd kissed Malfoy and loved it. Who would have thought?

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Adrenalin was still surging through him as he made his way out of the Change Rooms and into the arms of his awaiting fan base. Usually he would have been thrilled to see the mess of girls waiting for him to go and party with but not today. He was almost disgusted with it but what could he do?

They pulled him up towards the castle, the whole time cooing to him and telling him how great he was. Before he would have believed them, now for some reason he could see through their lies and tell that they only said it because he wanted to hear it. When he saw Granger standing up there casually leaning against that tree as if it were summer and not a week before Christmas he had felt his excitement beginning to grow. He excused him self and was relieved to see the back of the girls. Once they were safely away he all but ran up to the Gryffindor. No running wasn't the answer, that would look to needy.

She greeted him coolly, almost like he did to people but completely out of the ordinary for her. Well she had learned from the best he couldn't help but think. When she told him how well he'd played he felt like she truly meant it. It was a true compliment and one he'd never expected to here. Of course those blonde beauties would tell him as much as he liked but he'd never believe it from now on and his captain would just tell him how he could have done it better, in less time or something like that. No Granger was speaking the truth.

He was shocked when she motioned for him to follow her behind the greenhouse. Nothing good could come of this, he couldn't help but think. Nobody was around to stop him if for some reason he couldn't control his hormones. With other girls that had never bothered him before, he even liked that better but again he didn't agree with his old self. Something was changing and he couldn't figure out whether he liked the changes or not.

She opened her mouth to speak and those rosy lips all plumped up from the cold were just too enticing. He couldn't help himself; he was back to his old personality. Before he could blink his lips were smashed up against hers and he felt her stiffening. That tree she had been leaning up against would have had more give than she did at the moment. He was just about to pull away because the more caring side of him had realized what he had done but she began to respond to him. Instead of pulling back he began to kiss her harder. He could feel her cold hands working their way up his back and he shivered when she placed them on his neck, on the bare skin above his scarf.

No! He pulled away and wiped his mouth off. She wasn't that could of a kisser he mused. He'd known as soon as she'd started kissing him that she'd had little experience if any but he wasn't about to mention that to her she'd be embarrassed. But why did he care? He couldn't answer that one either.

Instead of commenting he uttered some cheesy even to him excuse and dashed away leaving her standing there with a look of shock and delight on her face. He knew what she was most likely thinking, wow I kissed Malfoy and he didn't hex me. His pride wasn't to dense to allow that thought through.

A wave of heat greeted him as he walked into the entrance hall. His feet automatically headed towards the dungeons but he forced them to stop. No way did he want to go down there now. Not after what he'd just experience. He needed to think things through and come up with a plausible excuse for the emotions he'd just felt. Instead he headed down to the place she had so enthusiastically shown him.

The House Elves greeted him as he walked in the recently appeared door and offered him trays of goodies. The delicious smells wafted through the huge room, mixing together to form one delightful aroma which made his mouth water.

"What would Mr. Malfoy like?" one elf squeaked. How they knew his name he didn't know, maybe they'd overheard someone mention it before but that wasn't all that important when a plate of steaming food was placed on a table and he was ushered towards it.

Hmm roast beef sandwiches with beef dip. An elf carted his plate away once he'd finished and he was shocked that he recognized it, "Hey," he exclaimed, "I know you," he said rather rudely.

"Yes young Master Malfoy?" it was a reflex, something he'd gained over the years and had never lost after leaving their house.

"Dobby?"

"It is Young Master?" the elf said annoyingly in his high squeaky voice. This elf had always been the one to see to his bath's and tuck ins at night when he was a small child. He had returned from school one summer to a different elf. One who because he was no longer a young child would bring him his tea and breakfast in the morning and turn down his bed at night. He'd always assumed that Dobby had up and died while he had been at school or his father had killed it which he'd been no to do in the past.

"What are you doing here? My father didn't free you?" It was a question, meant in the nicest of ways but as everything he usually said it came out as an accusation.

"Master freed me yes, but not knowingly."

"I don't follow?"

"Harry Potter tricked him."

"Dobby," he'd hated it before and he detested it now, the elf talking in riddles.

"Harry Potter put a sock in a book and Master gave the book to Dobby here."

And the talking in third person, no wonder he'd been secretly thrilled to no longer have Dobby as his House Elf.

"Okay then."

"Would Young Master like anything else?"

"Yeah something sweet and chocolaty," it would be hell to deal with tomorrow, his face a mess not to mention the notorious weight gain that was to ensure but he was craving something wicked and not of the food variety. No defiantly not food, she was anything but; delicious though he was sure. He licked his lips at the prospect and set into enjoying the gooey fudge and caramel brownie. Yes it would never compare to what he was sure she'd be like but it did feel good to indulge just a little bit in a different way. The rest was yet to come and man it was going to be sweet.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n I never thought I'd get this long of a chapter when I sat down to right but the words just flowed out so you guys are lucky today. An apology for not updating sooner I just got back from holiday and to top it off I now have to work for a week and a half straight (well almost) so there probably won't be another update for awhile. Then again if the reviews flow like the words did maybe I could find some time. ;)

Whew so Malfoy's getting a bit flustered now…and Hermione's made her move nothing good can come of that or can it? You'll have to review to find out. Thanks to those that have. Luv ya.


	6. Sick

"Get your stupid cat away from me-"

"Shut up-"

"Shove over-"

"That's disgusting stop-"

"I can't take this anymore-"

"I'm leaving," Hermione threw open the compartment door and stalked out. Ah another day in the wonderful world of the Weasley clan and co. What a horrible day this was going to be not to mention the two weeks of vacation. They'd only been sitting in their compartment for five minutes when Lavender had slid open the door and crawled over top of everyone, finally settling down in Ron's lap. Not a word had been exchanged since but a lot of saliva had. Ginny had not been as bad. It was common knowledge that all she wanted to do was straddle Harry and pull him as close to her as she could but she was being respectful of everyone else. Instead she'd only cuddled up to Harry's side and clasped his hand. Neville was lounging on the floor with a book and Luna was reading a magazine while absentmindedly curling her hair around her finger.

There wasn't enough room to start with but the compartment door slid open again and in walked Dean and Seamus. When Ginny saw Dean she sidled closer to Harry and brushed her lips across his ear as she whispered something to him. It was evident that Dean wanted to get out of there but Seamus wouldn't have any of that. He sat down beside Neville on the only available floor space and began animatedly talking to Harry.

Hermione stood up abruptly, leaving a vacated seat beside Ron and Lavender and stormed out of the overcrowded, loud compartment. Out in the corridor a wave of cool air hit her face. Now what? She had nowhere else to go. Everyone she knew was in the compartment she'd just left and she had no intentions of going back in there the rest of the train ride. Her only other option was the prefect's carriage. Yes that's where she'd go. It would be quite and most likely empty. Thankful that she'd grabbed her bag on the way out because it held some of her homework and a wonderfully trashy muggle romance in it she made her way to the opposite end of the train.

Every compartment she passed on her way was equally as full as hers had been, if not fuller. She shuddered at the poor people crammed inside. To her relief she pushed open the door to the Prefect's Carriage and noted that it was empty. Debating over whether to sit down at the sturdy conference table and getting a head start on her holiday homework or lounging on the comfortable couches and immersing herself in a period where lust was as forbidden as it was common. The couches won, she'd have plenty of time at the burrow that she'd want to get away from people and homework would be a great excuse. Mrs. Weasley probably wouldn't fare too kindly to Hermione saying she was going to miss a family game of gobstones because she wanted to go read her panty wetting book. Ha that would be a priceless look she'd receive.

Pulling her legs up under her and kicking her shoes off she immersed herself into her book. The train rattled along the track beneath her but the bumps and jolts just further absorbed her into a world where train travel was the norm. Her book was old, she'd bought it in a second hand store and so it opened easily and the pages were softened from age.

Romance a beautiful idea but did it really exist? She'd always wondered that. Was true love and soul mate's a real thing or just a piece of a writers endless dreaming? Could a prince really ride into town and sweep the poor Servant's daughter off her feet? It hurt her head to think of it. Of course she wanted it to be true, she wanted to believe that one day she'd have her prince but she just couldn't. She was too much of a realist. She had to get her dose of romance though in these trashy books. Everyone needs a bit of romance in their lives even if it was only on paper.

She was so engrossed that she didn't hear the door open nor the footsteps carry the person over to the lounge area where she was sitting.

"Good book?" he asked.

A startled gasp escaped her lips and she reflectively closed the book and lay it cover down on the empty space beside her. She didn't want anybody to see what she was reading that would be much too embarrassing. To late though, he reached down and picked up the book and stared at the cover. Blood soared to her face and all she wanted to do was sink into the cushions and never come out again. Why did it have to be him that interrupted her?

"So let me guess poor girl falls in love with rich man, her friends and family laugh at her and they tell her but she already knows that it would never work out. He doesn't even know who she is. Her house then catches on fire and he pulls her from the burning ruble, barely breathing and kisses her and she wakes up and they stare into each others eyes and promise to love each other for ever. How'd I do?"

"Pretty good I never knew you read romances," she laughed. Was she actually flirting with him, was that even possible she didn't know how to flirt?

"Nah Mother reads them," he glanced at the cover and saw a burly man wrapping his muscular arms around a petite girl with a fire in the background, "But not the muggle one's of course."

"Could I have it back?" she asked, there fun was over, leave it to him to ruin the perfect moment with a comment about her blood no matter how offhand it was.

"Fine," he tossed it to her and being as useless as she was at anything physical she missed it and it fell onto the floor. Her cheeks grew redder and she couldn't help but ask herself what was happening? She never lost her cool around him-not like this-why now?

"Yeah so," he mumbled.

"Well," she felt her hand rising to her lips as they started to tingle again. Whether it was from the memory of their kiss or her body telling her that it wanted more she didn't know. Besides she had to remember that this was Malfoy. Manipulative Malfoy as she'd so often called him in her head. He could make you believe one thing just so he could get what he wanted. He was probably doing that right now. He probably knew that Harry had some theory about him and he wanted to see how bad it was so he was being nice to her just until she let it slip. No she wasn't going to be that stupid.

"I've got to go," she said breathlessly. She hastily stood up and then bent down to retrieve her book. Throwing it in her bag as she went she stormed towards the door without really thinking where she was going to go. No way was she going back to sit beside Lavender and Ron playing tonsil hockey. She'd rather be burned to death than have to witness and hear such a thing again.

Crap, crap, crap! How dare the water works turn on at a time like this? With Malfoy there and everything. He'd have it spreading like wildfire through the Hogwart's gossip mill and it would go faster than ever because everyone was enclosed on the train. She needed to get to the nearest bathroom and quickly. She didn't believe that she'd be able to hold them back for that long.

Luckily there was a bathroom in the Prefect's carriage so she spun on her heel and hurried towards it. Malfoy was staring at her as she ran across the carriage. She wasn't going to make it she knew that already.

"Granger you okay?" was that just another of his manipulating tactics, pretending to be worried about her? Her whole world was crashing down and spinning into oblivion. Ron was dating someone else; Malfoy was being nice to her. She couldn't take it.

Flinging open the door she rushed inside the bathroom and kicked the door close but didn't bother lock it. It wasn't just the tears this time, her breakfast was coming up as well. She leaned over the toilet just as her stomach let go and her scrambled eggs came back up. Once she was done she flopped back onto the cold floor and allowed the tears to come. This was without a doubt the worse shape she'd been in over Ron and what made it even worse was the fact that Ginny wasn't here. Sweet Ginny, always there to comfort her when things took a turn for the worst and her heart was ripped out of her chest. This was a new low, never had she made herself sick because of worry. Shakily she reached out to flush the toilet, hide the evidence she thought. It wasn't that easy.

"Go away," she groaned, great just what she needed. Throwing up was bad enough but she didn't need him to rub it in her face. His nice charade couldn't last that long when he got a hold of the type of juicy information that he'd received today. Probably by the time she got of the train people would be saying she was either dying of some highly contagious disease and she'd most likely already infected every one of them or worse, she was pregnant! Argh not the best recipe for a painless Christmas Holiday.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

When she had stopped in her tracks and ran off in the direction of the bathroom he had been instantly on his guard. Something wasn't right. Then he'd seen the tears slowly making their way down her cheeks. Against his better judgment-a guy that barely knew a girl should intrude on in the bathroom-he made his way over to the semi-closed bathroom door.

He knocked but she must not have heard or she was ignoring him in hopes that he would go away. He was to far in now to turn around. He could see her curled up along side the toilet and he started to worry. Was she seriously ill, what should he do to get help for her? Or was it something less serious, but in a way more serious than just having the flu. No, he shook his head there was no way. She must have just eaten something funny. She had been so inexperienced when he'd kissed her that there was no way that he could believe that she was pregnant. It just didn't work out.

All of his past ideas and theories about how to go about were thrown out the window as he saw her on the hard floor. He was defenantly not giving up his chase, he wasn't like that, he still had to have her but he had to reason in a few unsuspected factors. She was a mess, it was obvious that she was hurting over something and he had a feeling that it was the Weasle who hadn't been that private about his relationship with that slutty Gryffindor. This would-if he changed all of his plans-actually work out for the better. It was quite apparent that she was in need of somebody to come in and save her, sweep her off her feet and when better to do that when she was down and out; helpless.

He couldn't help but think how much this was like her stupid book. Rich, handsome man rescues peasant girl who's fancied him forever but was way out of his league but then the man gets the girl, much to the protest of the two families. But he would end it before anything serious started. He was not a relationship type of guy. All he wanted was a good shag, or maybe a few if he could get it and then he'd dump her. Now just getting her to trust him so he could get that shag.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

"Leave me alone," she huffed but she was too weak to fight him off of her. He was being to nice, she couldn't let her guard down. It was clear that he had an other motive for what he was doing. Malfoy just wasn't nice for no reason.

"Granger stop fighting me," he hissed. The last time he'd told somebody to stop fighting him was the previous summer. It wasn't one of his proudest moments and he did admit that he'd done wrong. He'd been on a mission and she'd been a helpless muggle girl. Her family had been murdered and it was he's initiation as everyone called it. He'd rapped her on her living room rug as her dead family laid around her. He'd left afterwards and tried to not hear her screams of protest that kept echoing through his head, "Don't please don't, let go of me," she had begged. As he'd crawled off of her the cloaked men and one woman around him pulled out their wands and the women finished the girl off. To this day her screams still haunted him a night. So that's why when Hermione began to say, "Don't, please get off of me," he quickly dropped her like she was red hot and scurried out of the room. It was to much of a reminder of that night, a horrible night. And as bad as he wanted Granger he was not about to rap her to get her. He'd do it the proper way, as proper as leading her on was, but she would give him her consent. He was absolutely positive about that.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

"Don't, please get off of me," Hermione whimpered. Yesterday his closeness had felt amazing, today it felt overbearing and wrong. To her amazement and relief he instantly stepped away from her and walked out of the small bathroom. That was strange, she mused what caused him such a change of heart? Her stomach was settling down by now and her tears had stopped. What had disappeared was her longing to see Ron being hung from the tallest tree. How could he hurt her so badly? He was so arrogant. What a strange twist of fate she laughed at again Ron the arrogant inconsiderate one and Malfoy caring. She felt like she'd fallen into an alternate universe.

A quick gargle from the sink cleared her mouth enough but she longed for her toothbrush but that wasn't possible at the moment. It was most likely that Malfoy was still outside the door but she'd have to face him at some point so with a lump in her throat she made her way out into the spacious carriage. Sure enough he was sitting at the conference table staring out the window as the countryside flashed by.

He didn't look up and so she cleared her throat but that didn't help either so she found her feet carrying her across the room and when she was close enough to him laying her hand on his shoulder. He spun around startled and when he saw it was only her-who else could it be?-he stood up.

"I'm sorry," he apologized.

"For what?" confusion was evident in her voice. Of course she'd asked him to leave her alone but that had just been her confused, over private head talking. If he was in there he must have meant well. If he just wanted the inside scoop he would have rushed out at the first opportunity to spread the word.

"You asked me to leave and I didn't," his scrunched up his shoulders in a shrug.

"I wasn't in my right mind she whispered, embarrassed," she reasoned.

"It wasn't right."

"Stop," she mumbled, she stepped towards him and against her better judgment, she had just thrown up after all leaned into him. This wasn't the time to kiss but she could be close to him. He wouldn't have any of that though, he pulled her all the way to him and enveloped her. His lips met softly with hers and he took over the kiss because it was clear to him that she still didn't know what she was doing. It was alight, she'd learn.

She pulled away from him and whispered, "This isn't right. You're a Malfoy and I'm a muggleborn Gryffindor."

"I thought you were all for not having the separation because of house and blood?"

"I am, but others aren't so forgiving."

"Let them fret," he whispered as he pulled her into another kiss and she couldn't agree more. Who cared what they thought? But deep down she knew that she really did care and he did as well, as wonderful as this might be it plain and simple wasn't meant to be.

She pulled away from him abruptly and wandered back to the sofa.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Taking it slow, I'm not ready for anything more," she was scared out of her mind but she wasn't about to divulge the reason. This was new territory for her, somewhere she'd hoped to be but in a way never actually thought she'd be.

"Fine."

That one word surprised her. She always had thought that he'd be the guy who forced you to go farther than you were ready to go. After all he had gained the title as Sex God and Player.

"Mind if I read?" she asked more out of politeness than anything she really didn't care what his opinion was.

"Meh whatever," he shrugged and sat back down in his chair and leaned back, feet up on the table.

She curled back up with her book where the girl was just getting woken up by her prince's kiss. The girl was amazed how tingly her body felt. Just like me, Hermione thought.

This time she heard the door open and she threw her book aside again. It would be bad enough having her caught with the book, even worse to be caught with her and Malfoy acting civil to each other by themselves in a room. They had a precedent to keep up. To her relief it was only Ginny but then she saw Harry following close behind her. With a quick scan of the room she noticed that Malfoy was nowhere to be seen, he must have slipped out while she was reading.

"Hey," she said to her friends.

"Hey, have you been here the whole time?" they asked.

She nodded.

"Man it's quite in here, so peaceful. Ron and Lavender, urgh," Ginny grimaced then quickly apologized," Sorry."

"That's okay, I'm all good."

"Really?" Ginny asked and then she glanced at Harry to see if he understood what they were talking about. He didn't/

"Yeah I'm over."

"Well I'm so glad to hear that. Good for you."

"What are you talking about?" Harry finally asked.

"Girl stuff," they both chimed.

"Great," Harry grumbled as he settled down beside Hermione on the sofa, "Just great."

A chuckle rang out between Ginny and Hermione as they settled into a peaceful final half of the train ride. Hermione's book long forgotten.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n Yeah another chapter. So I'm going to repeat myself again. Please review, pretty please with a cherry on top. This story is really drawing me in and I love where it's going so updates should be coming pretty quickly. Reviews help though?

One question what do you guys think of the whole HP movie being bumped and Twilight now being released earlier. Good, Bad, haven't read Twilight (You should it's excellent)


	7. Excursions

The house was cool, the fire's had only just been lit and had only begun to spread their meager warmth throughout the house. Hermione pulled her robe closer around her as she walked down the creaky stairs in the burrow. Her parents were off at a on holiday with another couple and they had invited Hermione along but she had declined. Since her turn down she had regretted it. That meant she had to stay with Ron in the same house as her for two weeks. Of course they'd gone before for a long time without talking but this would be different. So to her utmost relief when she'd walked down those stairs to see Ron at one end of the couch with a scowl on his face and Lavender on the opposite end with Mrs. Weasley sitting between them she grinned. She'd been numb towards Ron since the train ride home, neither feeling hate nor love. She was indifferent up until that moment when she couldn't suppress a grin. That scowl and look of discomfort was priceless and for the first time since Ron had begun dating Lavender she walked over to them and talked to him. Life would go on, and to make it that much easier she had a secret that was sure to shut him up.

"Happy Christmas," she said joyfully as she bounded over to the group that had already assembled in the living room, "Why the long face Ron, it's Christmas. Or did you forget Christmas is you favorite day of the year?"

Ron didn't reply, instead he crossed his arms and tilted his head back and stared glumly up at the ceiling.

"Ronald," Mrs. Weasley barked, "That is no way to treat Hermione, now sit up properly and wipe that scowl off your face."

Ron sat up straighter but still did not look any bit more cheerful. With a sigh Mrs. Weasley stood up and walked into the kitchen with Hermione hot on her tails. Once they were safely in the kitchen and out of earshot Mrs. Weasley turned and said, "I don't know what's gotten into him."

Ginny came bustling into the room at that moment and whispered so only Hermione could hear him, "He hasn't got laid since we left school. Ha poor guy, not!"

Hermione, to Ginny's delight laughed, things were looking up.

"Ginny it's not polite to whisper," Mrs. Weasley scolded her youngest, "Now would you like to tell everyone what you just so rudely said?"

"No not really," and she turned and left the room.

"What can I help you with?" Hermione asked kindly. Poor Mrs. Weasley all those guys that she had to do everything for and nobody to help her.

"No, no, just go in with everyone."

Hermione knew not to argue and so she too retreated back into the living room where presents had begun to get thrown back and forth across the room and paper and bows had to be waded through.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Draco woke up and saw his small stack of presents sitting at the foot of his bed. His house elf must have delivered them while he was sleeping as he always had. The shiny wrapped gifts were not his highest priority as he walked into his adjoining bathroom. There, like always was a hot bath, with a heating charm on it waiting for him. He slipped out of his silk boxers and sunk into the hot water. Ahh heaven.

Once he'd figured he'd soaked long enough he climbed out and reached for his robe to wrap around himself. His hair was the next thing on the agenda. There was no way he'd ever let anybody see him without his hair immaculate, not even his family.

As he got dressed he couldn't help but think of Granger. Should he contact her over the holidays? After their kiss on the train he felt like that answer was yes. A lot could happen over two weeks especially while she was staying with those Weasley's and Potter, he didn't want to lose any ground. Not now. Yes he decided he would owl her and ask to meet her. But where? They couldn't go anywhere public, she could always come to the manor. No that wouldn't work, she'd never set foot here.

His pile of presents were now begging for his attention and so he sauntered over and carefully began unwrapping them. One at a time he pulled the tape back with care as to not tear the paper. He was meticulous this way. The bows and ribbons went into a neat little pile to his left and the paper he scrunched up into small balls and put it to his right.

The first gift was an elegant stationary set from his mother because she said he hardly wrote to her while he was at Hogwarts. All of his other gifts were expensive but useless. A new clasp for his robes from his father. A pair of leather gloves. The downside to being rich, he had everything always given to him so what more was Christmas, just another date on the calendar.

After he'd finished unwrapping he wandered throughout the house until his stomach told him it was time to go and see what was for breakfast. As always the house was quite. To quite some people might say but it was exactly how he liked it. No screaming kids, no animals running around he didn't know how those large families dealt with having no privacy. He'd surely kill himself before he had to go and live in a hell hole such as the Weasley's place.

The Dining Room was empty when he walked in. A place was set for him with his family's finest silver but there was only one setting. His Mother and Father were more than likely still in bed or if they were by some anomaly awake they would be taking breakfast in their separate bedrooms.

A scrawny house elf carried in a tray of steaming food as soon as he'd taken his seat and he dug into the delicious assortments of food. As always the kitchen house elves had done a wonderful job and the meal was splendid.

The silence that ensured as he ate gave him time to thing. As usual when he was home thinking was mostly what he did, for lack of better things to do. Tonight his Mother was hosting her annual Christmas Party. All of England's best and brightest would be there but his Father wouldn't and Draco had no plans to be either. His father would fake a head cold or a disaster a work and slip out before the party even began to go off and spend the night with his mistress. Draco's Mother knew what he did; the excuses were just a courtesy to her and their guests. For as long as Draco could remember he had escorted his Mother to her party and when he was still a small child she escorted him. The fact that his father was so open about his mistress wasn't unusual in their type of society. Most men of their class held a mistress and a wife. It was abnormal not to.

Draco planned to escort his Mother into their ballroom and then once she was immersed in her hostess duties he would slip out. He'd never had much of a love for these parties. There were always some little old ladies trying to get him to dance with their ugly daughters. No that wasn't for him, he liked to control his fate and he couldn't do that with a five foot tall lady continuously poking him in the stomach until he obliged to her demands.

Tonight he resolved, instead of settling on sending a note he would sneak over and meet her. They could do whatever they pleased in the dark of night and nobody would be there to witness it. Yes that would work, but he'd have to send her a note of warning first. He jumped up from his meal and hurried upstairs to pen the note.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

The Weasley's were just sitting down to their Christmas supper when they heard a tapping at the window. The kitchen was filled to capacity and then some so the closest person to the window-Charlie-jumped up and opened. A large owl flew over in the window and over the table, finally finding its perch on Hermione's shoulder. It stuck out its leg and Hermione untied the piece of parchment. She knew right away who it was from and she was also smart enough to tuck it quickly in her pocket before anybody could snatch it from her.

"What does it say?" Fred demanded

"Yeah," his twin chimed in.

"Now, now boys you're being rude. Let Hermione read it in private," Mrs. Weasley scolded her sons.

Ginny had also realized who it was from and she gave Hermione the smallest of winks from her seat across the table.

"I've interrupted this delightful meal enough already, let's not let it get cold," Hermione threw out in hopes that food would be more important to these hungry teenagers than her secret letter was. She was right because they all nodded their agreement and picked up their forks.

After the last of the food had been cleared away and Mrs. Weasley had charmed the dishes into washing themselves, Hermione and Ginny excused themselves from their kitchen duties and raced upstairs and into Ginny's room, which they were sharing-to their disgust-with Lavender.

Ginny pushed open the door and stopped so suddenly that Hermione ran into her.

"Ooof," Ginny grunted, "Watch where you're walking."

"Sorry," Hermione said, "Why'd you stop?"

Ginny tilted her head towards the window. There underneath was Lavender, curled up on the floor and sobbing. Ginny turned to Hermione and grimaced, "What should we do?" she mouthed.

"You do what you want, I'm leaving," Hermione mouthed back and then turned and headed over to the bathroom. She needed privacy to read the letter.

Ginny looked back and forth between her retreating friend and her sobbing roommate and sighed Ron was so stupid and left her to deal with this. Well she couldn't just walk away so she said, "Lavender," softly.

Lavender didn't move, she just kept trembling so Ginny walked over to her and said a little louder, "Lavender."

"Go away," she grumbled.

Ginny didn't need telling twice. If she wasn't wanted there, there was no way she was staying. Hermione needed her now more than ever so Ginny knocked on the bathroom door, "Hermione can I come in?" she hoped to god that the letter was good news, she really didn't have the energy to deal with Hermione being depressed again. It was hard on her and Harry trying to have a happy relationship because they felt guilty about their strong relationship when their friends were struggling.

"Yeah, just a sec," Hermione called softly threw the door. The lock clicked and Ginny pushed open the door and walked in. Hermione was sitting up on the counter with her feet dangling over the edge and Ginny climbed up beside her.

"So…" Ginny enquired.

Hermione handed her the note and Ginny was surprised to see how short it was.

_Meet me 11:00 outside the front gate. D_

"Hermione is there something here that you're not telling me?" Ginny asked.

Hermione grimaced and said, "Sort of, but not anything like you think."

Ginny raised her one perfectly arched eyebrow as only she could do. No other words were needed.

"We kissed, or rather he kissed me."

"Ahh," Ginny squealed and reached over to give Hermione a hug, causing herself to almost tumble off the counter in the process, "I want to hear everything. What did you think, was it totally amazing?"

"Yeah," Hermione smiled as she remembered after the Quidditch Match.

"When? Why didn't you tell me?"

"After the Quidditch Game."

"Did he approach you?"

"No."

"Oh la la girl," Ginny giggled, "Spill."

So she did. Hermione explained that it hadn't just been one day, but on the train as well. When they finished Ginny leaned back and said, "Watch it girl, don't get in to fast."

It was a warning that Hermione had been mulling over since the train ride.

"So what are you going to wear tonight?"

"Ginny," Hermione moaned.

"Just asking, it is kinda like a date."

"No it's kinda not."

"Whatever."

"Good."

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Draco met his Mother at the top of the stairs and offered her his harm which she gratefully accepted. Worry lines creased her face that hadn't been there before Draco noted and he knew that she was thinking about her husbands excursions.

"Mother?"

"Yes, let's go," she shook herself free of those painful thoughts. It was hard knowing your husband was off somewhere with another woman no matter how much you didn't get along with him. A little bit of fear had edged it's way into her brain. That fear was that his mistress would convince him to throw his wife away and marry her.

They greeted their guests but as soon as it was clear to sneak away Draco made his move. He knew he wouldn't be missed.

Draco grabbed his broom and it was at times like this that he wished he could apparate. A quick warming spell and a Dillusion charm later and he was off. Thankfully it was only a short distance to where Hermione was staying. As he soared into the sky he felt a wave of adrenalin surge through him and he felt amazing. He was doing something downright bad in his family's opinion. Baling out on his Mother's party and flying of to meet Granger. It felt amazing.

He landed without a hitch behind a row of bushes not far from that piece of trash house and he set about waiting. He was early and he knew it, but to his surprise he didn't have to wait long.

"Hey," a soft voice broke the silence, startling him so badly that he jumped, "You're early."

"So are you," he replied.

"Yeah well I saw my moment to escape and I took it."

"Same here."

An awkward silence followed and neither of them knew what to say to the other. What common ground did they have?

"Do you want to walk?"

"Sure."

He stashed his broom in the bushes and then side by side they strolled along the deserted road, the chilly night air trying to force its way through their layers of clothing.

Silence enveloped them as the walked for more than half a kilometer. Finally breaking the silence Draco commented, "It's going to be a White Christmas after all."

Hermione looked up to the sky in search of any tell tale snow flakes but saw no such thing, "I don't see any."

"Look at the sky," he pointed to the sky over the village in the distance. The sky was hugging the hills and the lights from the village were turning the sky a purpley, pink colour.

"Okay," she still didn't completely understand but she hated sounding stupid so she let the subject drop. Sure enough five minutes later the first snow flakes began floating towards the earth.

"I think the temperature just dropped ten degrees," she grumbled as she tugged her scarf closer around her neck.

Draco quickly responding to her cue slipped his arms out of his cloak and handed it to her.

"Don't be daft," she exclaimed, "I'll survive, but you without a cloak on will surely catch your death."

"No I insist," as he thrust it upon her.

"Malfoy," she said sternly, "I'm fine, really."

"Now what kind of guy would I be if let you freeze to death here?"

"One that does what he's told."

"I've had enough of doing that," he mumbled but not loud enough for her to hear.

He tried to throw the cloak over her shoulders but she dodged him and quickly skirted away.

"Get back here," he growled playfully.

She let out a giggle; this was amazing who would have thought she'd half so much fun with Malfoy?

He chased after her for a few minutes and finally grabbing her wrists as she tried to hide from him behind a tree, "I've got you now," he laughed.

"And I really don't need an extra cloak, I'm hot now from running."

"Well neither do it then," as he said it he through his extremely expensive cloak down on the ground and spread it out and once he'd done that he'd grabbed Hermione's wrist and pulled her towards him and then down onto the cloak. They lay down and began to kiss as the snow started falling faster. They'd be covered in no time if the didn't move but that wasn't high on either of their concerns list at the moment. The only thing they could think of was each other.

"Mmm," Hermione moaned as Draco's lips brushed her ear. This sign of pleasure only caused Draco to kiss her more intensely. He wanted to do much more, his body was begging for it but his conscience kept telling him no, she wasn't ready yet.

They pulled apart at one point and Draco sat up. Hermione not liking having him looking down on her sat up as well, "Something's wrong? What did I do?" she whispered nervously.

"Nothing," he quickly replied reassuringly, "I just have a question."

"Okay," she said hesitantly, "Ask away."

"Have you ever kissed before?"

She quickly turned away but not before he saw the tears in her eyes, "No, no," he quickly said as he laid a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"I know I'm a horrible kisser," she stuttered, "But…"

"Hermione good god you're not," it was true, their first kiss had been pretty bad, but that was obvious it was from inexperience and even more from nerves that was understandable. Now her kissing was a hundred times better.

"You're lying, tell me the truth."

"Hermione," he sighed, "Okay sure our first kiss was pretty bad I have to admit but after that you've gotten better, mind you your breath was pretty fowl after you vomited."

She giggled, "I still can't believe you kissed me after that. Was I really that bad the first time?"

He nodded glumly knowing how hard this must be for her, "So I was your first kiss?"

"Yeah," she muttered, "You were. Now go and gloat because you made the innocent Granger not so innocent anymore."

"Come here," he drew her towards himself and gave her a hug.

"I feel like a fool," she sighed.

"Why?"

She didn't know why she was telling him this but the words just began to flow, "I'm sixteen and up until a week ago I'd never been kissed in my life, never even had a boyfriend. I feel like the biggest loser that you can imagine."

"Your sweet," he replied, "Don't feel bad," why was he saying this only a month ago he was thinking about how big a loser she was because she was so 'innocent' now he was telling her that that didn't matter. Everything was getting so confusing.

"I better get back before somebody tortures my whereabouts out of Ginny."

"Would she tell?" he asked worriedly.

"Of course not," she laughed, "I'm just freezing and really wishing your cloak wasn't soaking wet now."

"Yeah," he bent over and grabbed the cloak from the wet ground, "I'll walk you back."

Just before they reached the gates to The Burrow Draco pulled Hermione towards him for one last kiss, "Goodnight," her whispered huskily into her ear.

"When can I see you again?"

"I don't know, soon I hope."

She nodded even though she wasn't fully satisfied with his answer.

"Night."

"Night."

She opened the creaky old gate and walked up the path to the house. At the porch she turned around and saw him disappearing off into the shadows.

Inside the house was quite and Hermione watched her step as she headed upstairs not wanting to trip over something and wake the whole house. To her disappointment Ginny was snoring softly in her bedroom, Hermione had really wanted to talk but oh well morning would come soon enough. She struggled out of her soaking wet cloths and in an un-Hermione like thing tossed them into a pile on the floor. She'd deal with them in the morning. All she wanted now was to lie down in bed and fall asleep. She hoped that she didn't talk in her sleep. That wouldn't be good if Lavender heard about her adventures. Not good at all.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n the ending's rushed I know, my dad's yelling ever two minutes for me to turn the computer off so I had to cut it short but I still wanted to post tonight. So for all my troubles do you guys think you can spare a review or two? Thank you.


	8. Honesty

The wind blew across the open platform, chilling everyone in its path and the sky was darkening. It wouldn't be long before the rain or maybe even snow started to fall. Young children cried as they realized that once again their older siblings were leaving them and they still had to stay at home.

Mrs. Weasley sent her kids and adopted family off with loving hugs and a few tears.

"Thanks for everything Mrs. Weasley," Hermione said as she hugged the woman who was her second mother.

"Oh no problem dear, it was a pleasure."

Hermione was about to walk off and board the train when Mrs. Weasley grabbed her armed and pulled her back.

"Don't let it get to you, it'll be hard I know but you'll have to move on. Sometimes things aren't meant to be."

"What?" Hermione asked confused.

"Ron's…well I can't say anything bad he's my son after all, but we both known that he's not to serious about anything or anyone. Don't get stuck down on it. You're young and have everything going for you. Remember that."

"Thanks Mrs. Weasley, how did you know?" she enquired.

"A mother knows dear," when she saw the look on Hermione's face she replied, "You weren't that obvious, just enough."

"Well I'm finally over him, I'm moving on and I couldn't be happier," it was the utmost truth. Her relationship or whatever she should call it was so exhilarating, dangerous. If she and Ron had have worked out it would have been mundane. No surprises. Her personal life was already pretty laid back so to have the excitement was wonderful.

"I'm glad to hear that," she replied but didn't look totally convinced.

For good measured Hermione added, "Really I am."

The train whistled sounded cutting off the end of their conversation.

"Go," Mrs. Weasley urged, shooing Hermione towards the train.

As Hermione boarded the train she was hit with a wave of pleasant and not so pleasant memories. There were some things she'd like to repeat, like the kiss for example but in no way was she planning on stressing herself out so much that she'd vomit. Nope those days were behind her. It amazed her at how different she felt than two weeks before. She felt more confident and more mature and she used that to her advantage as she strolled through the corridors.

Looking for her friends or better yet Malfoy she walked through the train, carriage by carriage and glanced in each compartment as she passed. She figured that nobody she knew would be in the first few carriages; those were the worst ones and the ones that the youngest students got stuck with. There was no privacy with everyone walking by and it was extremely loud. Being a sixth year her friends would most likely be in the back carriage. Sure enough she found a relatively empty compartment occupied by only her closest friends. She slid the door open a bit disappointed that she hadn't passed the compartment occupied by the sixth year Slytherins but she resolved that she'd have a lot of spare time on the train to go and wander around. Since their adventures at Christmas they hadn't seen or even spoken to each other. No letters were exchanged as they had promised but she figured that he was trying to keep what they were doing a secret.

"Hey Hermione, what took you so long?" Ron asked.

Hermione had started throughout the break working on her friendship with Ron and it had paid off in the end. Beside's intimacy was obviously not what was fated for them but why lose their strong friendship over such a thing?

"Your mother."

"Okay, gotcha," he nodded.

Harry and Ginny had only glanced at her as she entered the compartment then resumed their kissing. It was the first time Hermione had seen them become physical in front of anyone else and honestly she didn't mind. She had felt sorry for Ginny who must have felt always on edge and not wanting to rub her relationship in her friends face.

Hermione didn't have to wait long before she ran into Malfoy; he came and found her in his own unique way.

The compartment door slid open once again and like it had done when Hermione had entered, it triggered Harry and Ginny to separate and glance at who was disturbing them. Unlike with Hermione when they saw who it was they didn't resume kissing.

"Malfoy," Harry said coldly, "Why don't you save yourself the trouble and leave."

"Now that wouldn't be any fun now would it Potter?"

Hermione knew she had to keep up her precedent, now it was more important than ever. What should she do? What did she used to do in this situation? Then it hit her, Ginny had mentioned that Hermione unlike Harry and Ron had dealt with Malfoy with words. Harry and Ron always pulled their wands out and threatened to blow him to pieces but she instead always struck the nail on the head and went for where it would hurt him, his ego. If she did that again he would know she was only keeping up face. Meanwhile as these thoughts tumbled through her head Harry and Ron kept up their I'm more macho than you fight which was pointless. Malfoy could take them down in an instant and not because he was better at magic than them but because he wouldn't hesitate to you some dark curse. Harry and Ron had never realized that, maybe that was one of the reasons Hermione preferred to use mind games. She knew she amazing with her wand, but Malfoy had that one advantage over her.

One sentence hauled Hermione out of her head, "Well I bet you had an absolutely delightful Christmas in that hell hole you call a home. It's the Burrow right? Tell me how long did it take you to dig your house into the ground? I bet you only have one small room, boy that must be crammed with you overly large family. Tell me Weasley, did your mother not know how to say no?"

That was the trigger point for both Ron and Harry. Ginny was smart enough to know that he had an ulterior motive and so she too with Hermione refused to let it hit home. Instead she glanced over at Hermione as the boys jumped into action, silently asking Hermione if she was going to take care of it in her usual way or if she herself should. Hermione gave a curt nod as she saw Malfoy watching her and Ginny's wordless exchange. He was not one bit concerned about the two wands that had been trained on him or the threats spewing out of their holder's mouths.

"Drop it guys," Hermione said calmly, she had to say something before either of them carelessly fired the first shot and in return got seriously hurt.

"Hermione," Harry said in a warning tone. He absolutely hated that every time Malfoy walked into their clutches she broke up the fun.

"Let that lady talk," Malfoy laughed, "It should be a right old laugh to hear her trying to save your sorry asses."

Neither Ron nor Harry lowered their wands and Ginny shot a look in Hermione's direction saying 'Do it now or I will.'

Hermione opened her mouth and felt the words rolling off of her tongue. They weren't planned-they never were-but they found their intended target. She knew how his mind worked and what would get him or at least appear to get him, "You call The Burrow a hell hole but from what I've heard your house is worse. You could walk around for a week and not run into anybody. Your Mother and Father live in opposite ends of the house and rarely leave their wings. Beside's who'd want a father that's only concerned on his mistress and his illegitimate son?"

Everything she threw at him he had told her on their walk. About how he had a half brother who was now three years old that his father doted on and how his parents would go to the extremes to not see each other. Only staying married to avoid a scandal. Yes what went on behind closed doors at Malfoy Manor was truly gossip worthy.

Malfoy's jaw dropped and she awarded herself victory on that one but when he still stared at her in utter shock as the seconds ticked by she worried that she had taken it a step to far. Harry and Ron were both shell shocked, both understandably wondering how she knew such information and Ginny looking at her disapprovingly. Yes she had a feeling she'd taken it to far.

Without another word Malfoy turned around and swiftly left the compartment. As soon as it was safe to go Hermione knew she had to go and talk to him. She needed to know if his reaction was as fake as her harsh words or if he was truly mad at her. She hoped for the former.

"My god Hermione that was absolutely bril," Ron cheered.

"Way to go," Harry applauded. Both boys' anger at not having the opportunity to use their wands on Malfoy long forgotten.

Ginny didn't say anything instead she kept shooting glances at Hermione which clearly said that she had screwed up big time and better go fix it.

"Wasn't that amazing?" Harry asked Ginny when her time to congratulate Hermione had come and gone in an awkward exchange of looks.

"Yeah bloody brilliant," she replied.

"Did you make that stuff up?" Ron asked.

"Of course she didn't," Ginny said looking at her brother with disgust, "He would have never had that reaction to a bit of b.s."

Hermione's head was spinning, "Malfoy had told her that in confidence, he had accidently let it slipped but when she became so sympathetic he told her the whole story. Now she'd let that cat out of the bag and there was no doubt now that rumors over an illegitimate Malfoy would be flying, "Yeah I made it up," Hermione said softly. Putting on her best face and trying to make everything right. It was the least she could do after letting such a huge secret slip, "I guess he was just shocked at how such a juicy rumor would fly and that's why he looked as shocked as he did. He was caught by surprise. Sorry to ruin your delight guys."

"You're kidding right?" Ron moaned.

"No I made it up."

"Aww you had us going there, well it was a good story," Harry said disappointingly.

"Yeah it was, how do you think of such things?" Ginny asked playing along.

"It just came to me. I really don't know. I guess it might have something to do with this book I was reading on muggle aristocrats in the Victorian era and how most of the men had a mistress but meanwhile kept their wives in their desperate attempts at producing a son to be their heir. It was an amazing book if anybody wants to read it," good save she congratulated herself. Just the mention of book turned everyone away.

"No thanks," everyone muttered, truly disappointed that Hermione had created the whole thing.

Only when it would not cause any suspicion Hermione excused herself to go and use the washroom. She had not intention of doing so and instead walked to the very back of the train and then turned around and walked all the way through the train and to the Prefect's Carriage. Hoping that like before it would be empty. Sure enough it was. And like she had expected the door slid open not long after she had settled down at the conference table.

Only when the door had safely latched did the yelling begin.

"What the hell do you think you were doing?" he bellowed, "Have you lost your mind. You stupid, dimwitted Gryffindor scum."

"Oh really," she stood up hotly and sent her chair reeling backwards, "So you can walk in and provoke everyone and that's okay now is it. Oh I forget your Malfoy everything's okay as long as it hurts others and not you."

"That's not the point."

"Then what is?" she screamed losing her cool.

"Well…"

"Exactly. What I say bother's you because it's the truth."

"No what bother's me is that I told you something that nobody else knows about me and I thought that you of anyone would be able to realize that I wanted it kept that way," he tried to reason.

"So that's all you're worried about, your perfectly family name?" she chastised.

"No, well yes. No!"

"Sod of."

"You."

She lunged forward and locked her lips with his. This kiss was the most intensive of theirs yet and even Malfoy was amazed at the power of it. He'd never felt anything like it before. Who would have thought with a little practice that Granger would become such a hot and heavy kisser? He should get her riled up more often.

When they pulled apart Hermione whispered, "I covered for you."

"Now how'd you do that?" he whispered into her ear as he caressed her jaw with his fingers.

"The same way I threw it at you. My brain works quickly in case you haven't noticed and all it took was to say I had this book I had been recently reading and…"

"I don't want to hear about it," he kissed her lips to silence her.

"They said the same thing."

"Well I should hope they didn't all become physical with you."

"No only Ginny."

"Your brain does work quickly."

"You should experience it one day. It gets truly annoying at times."

He pulled her back to the table and boosted her up onto it so that she was now at his level. His height of six foot three was a huge difference from her meager five four.

"There, that's better," he murmured as he trailed his lips over her.

"Ahh," a soft moan of pleasure escaped her lips as he bit down on her bottom lip.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Malfoy couldn't believe it when he hears those words come spewing out of her overly large mouth. Every thing that he had felt for her over the past weeks had immediately vanished and what was left in its place was pure loathing. How dare she go and spouting out such horrible words. And she was gloating about it. The shocked looks and looks of admiration on Weasley and Potter's face were eminent but what got him was the look that the girl Weasley was sending Hermione. It was only a look of somebody in the know could give. That girl knew what he and Granger where doing and that terrified him.

Knowing when he had lost he turned around and stormed out of the Gryffindor infested compartment. Damn Gryffindors, damn Granger who did she think she was? He headed back to his compartment but with full intentions of confronting her. When she walked by the door to the compartment he knew what she was doing. There was no other reason that she would be walking at the very end of the train other than if she wouldn't to talk to him. He excused himself and slipped out of the compartment and trailed after her.

Once inside the safety of the Prefect's Carriage he let the bomb drop. They both screamed at each other and it felt good. For once they were acting like they normally did towards each other. Sometime's their ability to decipher what the other was hinting at or even understand what they were saying without words was scary. They had been doing it unknowingly since they had started school together.

Their passion invoked into screaming at each other they both realized could be directed a different ways and used at more productive things so they rushed to each other and shut the other one up with their lips.

The fireworks were flying and it was a beautiful display.

"You know, nobody has any idea about what we're doing," she said breaking away.

"Why would they?"

"I don't know, maybe we were acting differently towards each other. Kinder."

"So you're saying we should start throwing curses at each other in the corridors?"

"No I believe what happened today was perfect. We've never fought with anything but out words. Today I believe just secured the doubts in anybody's minds. We definantly have nothing going on."

"No we don't," he whispered as he leaned in for another kiss. Man she was impressive and also right. He'd never want to experience even a minute inside her head.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n I'm kinda disappointed in myself. I've been doing so well at keeping the chapters at a minimum of 3000 words. A huge feat for me for me as those of you who read my other stories know but today I fell short and I just couldn't squeeze anything more out. I hope you enjoyed though. By the way I've posted a new one shot just minutes ago called Much Too Soon so check it out if you have the time. I really love how it turned out. Back to this story. Please review and I'd love to hear from all you silent readers. I know you're out there and I really want to hear what you think. Thanks to everyone who continuously reviews. Luv yah.


	9. Feelings

The week before Easter was the date set for the final Quidditch game of the year. It was said that it would be a way to get everyone relaxed after a few long months of school work but also give them a break because Easter meant that Exams were coming. Gryffindor had beaten Hufflepuff narrowly in the last regular season game and thus ensured their position in the final game of the season. Against Slytherin would they'd lost to a two months before. This left Hermione in a bit of a dilemma.

"Who are you going to cheer for baby?" Malfoy leaned over and whispered in Hermione's ear. They were curled up together in the room of requirement. It had become their oasis away from the grueling school. They'd both been very good at keeping their relationship a secret. At times that they would run into each other in the hallway it became a battle of the words. It was understood though that whatever was said was never intended to hurt. Both of them found themselves not even listening, or if they did happen to listen trying to hold back their laughter. It was very comical what they each would come up with. Sometimes they asked each other if by hating each other so obviously they were making it look faked. After reasoning that to everyone else they were the worst type of enemies that discussion was closed.

"Well that all depends," Hermione replied mysteriously.

"On what," he was about arms distance away but that was too far for her so she cuddled up closer to him.

"On whose looking?"

He nodded. She was going to be a Gryffindor fan through and through at the game. Decked out in red and gold and cheering the red cloaked player's triumphs and booing the greens every move.

There was a small fire burning in the grate that gave off waves of stifling heat. It was probably unnecessary seeing as the weather was changing and they'd more than likely seen the last of the bitter winter weather. The only reason they kept it burning was routine. Since they'd decided that they'd meet here after returning to school they'd come to the same room and neither could bear to change it in anyway. So much had happened in this room between them. A new friendship was born along side something more. Hermione found that after a long a stressful day she'd have somebody that would listen to her complain about the smallest things and not tell her to shut up. They'd bonded over the smallest of things and it became that they felt like they could tell each other anything without fear of being ridiculed. Something that neither of them thought would ever be possible, both believing that no matter what headway they made they'd always have their history weighting down on them.

"I better go," Hermione said unraveling herself from Malfoy's arms, "Everyone's…"

"Yeah I know," he said. He stood up as well and kissed her on briefly on the lips, "Your needed right?"

She nodded glumly, "If it was up to me I'd never leave."

"When are you going to tell them?" he asked. If it had been up to him he would have by now revealed what they were doing, but that was him.

"I'm not ready to," she whispered.

"Hermione you know me now. I'm not a bad guy, I'm not in this to hurt you," the impact of those words hit him like a ton of bricks because they were the truth. What were his intentions then? "Before I could understand. You were nervous, felt like you were doing something bad but we're both on the same terms here. We're in it for the same reasons."

"Thanks, I'll think about it," then she disappeared out the door.

Malfoy sighed and flopped back down on the coach. Man she was getting difficult. His mind began to race circles around the words he'd just told her. Were they really what he thought? What happened to getting laid and leaving? All he knew was that he'd never felt like this before in his life. Whether that was a good or bad thing was yet to be determined.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

"I think I'm ready to tell Harry and Ron," Hermione said bluntly as she was walking down the girl's staircase beside Ginny. She'd just returned from being with Malfoy and his words at been stuck in her head. He'd told her that he wasn't in it to hurt her. Those words gave her a little bit of comfort. Enough that she figured now was as good a time as any to divulge her adventures for the last several months. She knew that if she came out with her head she'd be lucky but it had to be done.

"Now?" Ginny asked confused. Hermione had shown no hint of her plans up until now and she had a feeling that it was a split second decision, that she was acting on impulse and wanting to get it over with while she had the nerve.

Hermione nodded as Ginny led her over to the boys playing Exploding Snap by the fire.

"Hey boys how's the game going?" Ginny said. The sound of her voice was enough to distract Harry and when he turned reflexively to look at her the cards exploded in his face. Leaving black smudge marks along his cheeks.

Hermione pulled out her wand and a quick spell later Harry was as good as new, "So let's go for a walk," Ginny suggested forcefully.

"Aww man the game…" Ron moaned.

"Oh I'm so glad to hear your enthusiasm. Now let's go," Ginny ordered her older and much taller brother. He obliged although unwillingly. The four teens stepped out the portrait hole and once in the safety of the deserted corridor Ginny added, "Hermione wants to talk to you."

Panic swept across Hermione's face and she felt like causing Ginny as much pain as was humanly possible, "No she doesn't," Hermione quickly stuttered out.

Her inability to say a simple phrase properly caught the boy's attention and their ears were trained on Hermione, "Go ahead," Ron urged.

"Yeah what's this all about?" Harry nudged.

After a minute of silence and a rather painful nudge from Ginny, Hermione still refused to unclamp her jaw. She'd kept quite so long that it was now hard to talk about it. And she was scared. Terrified that they'd walk away and call her a traitor and also terrified that they'd laugh. She couldn't decide which one was worse.

"Hermione has a boyfriend and she figured she should tell you before you guys round a corning and catch them snogging," Ginny said it simply like it was an everyday thing. To her it was, but not to Hermione, and especially not when Malfoy was involved.

Ron's eyes were as big as saucers and his jaw dropped. Both of these things didn't go unnoticed by either Hermione and Ginny who exchanged looks and smirks. Harry on the other hand was much calmer. He plain and simple didn't say anything nor show any emotion. Causing Ginny to raise her hand and wave it rudely in front of his face until he came around, "Oh for Pete's sake. It's like you guys have are absolutely dense. Malfoy's blokes would have reacted better than this I'm sure."

Those words were directed at Hermione and Ginny gave her a small wink. Hermione couldn't decide whether to laugh at the truth of it or cry.

"So who's the lucky guy?" Harry managed to ask.

"Well that's where this get's a bit tricky," Ginny laughed lightly to ease the tension.

"It's a frickin' girl isn't it. You're a lesbian?"

"Ron!" Ginny scolded.

"Okay."

"No it's not a girl."

All eyes were trained on Hermione and she felt like the best thing for her to do was to curl up into a ball and play dead. There was no other option and so she unclamped her jaw for the first time all year and whispered," Malfoy," she said it so quietly that nobody heard her.

"I beg your pardon," Harry said, "Speak up."

"Malfoy," she said louder.

Ron started to laugh and through it he managed to say, "I'm sorry I could have sworn you just said Malfoy?"

Hermione nodded.

If the look on either of their faces was anything to go by Hermione was glad that looks couldn't kill.

"Are you absolutely nuts," Harry cried.

"What the bloody hell were you thinking? Malfoy?" Ron fumed.

"You know as well as we do that he's up to no good."

"What about how he's treated you all these years? How he's treated us?"

"He's a piece of dirt Hermione. A Death Eater!"

"Do you not understand? People like him kill people for fun."

The tears had begun to roll silently down Hermione's face and she stood there helplessly. Taking the brunt force of their words and knowing that everything they said was true. Ginny reached out for her hand and grasped it tightly, "Shut up," she told the guys.

"How long has this been going on?"

"You hate him. We hate him."

"I said shut up!" Ginny bellowed. This finally caused the reaction that she was looking for and the boys fell silent.

All eyes fell on Hermione who gathered all of her courage and calmly said as she wiped the tears away, "Malfoy and I have been dating since January. And yes I know what he used to be like, or what we thought he was like. Maybe if you knew him like I did now you'd think about what you just said."

"He's brainwashed her," Ron said to Harry then turned to Hermione, "Hermione don't you get it, that's exactly what he does, he's a player. He uses you and tells you what you want to hear and then once he's through with you he throws you away."

Hermione sniffed and wiped at her eyes.

"What's it going to take for you to realize that?" Harry demanded, "Does it take for you to get thrown in the gutter, battered and bruised whether it's physically or just mentally for you to realize?"

Hermione didn't answer and this caused Harry to explode and turn and storm away but not before he turned on Ginny. Harry was never angry but when he was it was quite apparent that he bottled it up, "And you were in on this. I can't believe you. You should know better."

Hermione and Ginny were left standing helplessly in the corridor as Ron gave them a confused look and ran off. It was evident that he didn't hold the extremely harsh feelings like Harry did but he wasn't pleased with Hermione's behavior either.

As Hermione thought about it Harry did have reason to be angry with her. She was going against everything that they'd fought for together. Of course Harry would be the one to take it the hardest after everything that had happened to him.

"Are they right?" Hermione whispered to an equally stunned Ginny. Poor Ginny this had never been meant to ruin her relationship with Harry.

Ginny shook it off. Knowing that Harry would cool down eventually but for now he needed his space, "What do you believe?"

"Well that's helpful now isn't it?"

Ginny shrugged, "You say you know him? Well do you. Can you say and be honest that you've never suspected him to be up to something? Do you trust him fully?"

"Well…"

"Be careful. It's okay to have fun. By god you need it no offense but be prepared. It is Malfoy and as much as you hate to admit it right now he is not always the kindest person. I really don't know."

"Thanks," she whispered and turned away. She needed to go for a walk, spend a little time with her thoughts.

"Hermione," Ginny called.

"What?"

"I'm sorry."

"Whatever for?"

"I feel like I got you into this mess."

"Ginny don't apologize. Whatever happens I've had a good time."

What she didn't know was that her instincts had been wrong and everything was about to change.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n Well it was the perfect breaking point I believe. I could have gone on for much longer but I think it'll be best if I split it into two chapters. So please review. They help me get motivated and update sooner. Thank you so much to all of you that have reviewed. You guys are absolutely wonderful. Cheers.


	10. Wounds

She'd always been cautious. Most would say over cautious, she just called it better safe than sorry. It seemed fitting that the one time she put her heart out on the line it was shredded into tiny pieces.

Her fingers twisted together, then untwisted. Finishing off the process by combing through her hair and then starting all over again. She'd thought she'd never feel worse than she had every time Ron did something stupid and immature. She was wrong. Her feet carried her through the deserted corridors of the castle. He'd broken up with her. Told her that while it had been fun it was a mistake. A mistake! The nerve.

It was supposed to be a special evening for them. Instead she had walked into the Room of Requirement only to find there to be no fire and Malfoy sitting in one of the armchairs. At once she had known that nothing good could result from this sort of mood. She rushed over to his side, praying that she was only being worrisome. Her worst fears had been confirmed when he abruptly stood up but would not make eye contact with her. Hermione's heart rate drastically increased at that moment and she felt her palms growing sweaty.

He didn't drag it out, instead he made it as brief as possible, "This can't go on any longer," if that wasn't enough to shatter her heart his next words solidified the job, "You're just a Gryffindor muggle born who has no place in the life of a pureblooded Slytherin," he turned and walked out of the room without a backwards glance. If he had of he would have seen the tears flowing freely down the brunettes face.

Hermione flung herself down on the sofa and nursed her grief. Harry, Ron, they'd all been right. He was Malfoy, a manipulative scum bag who could make you believe anything as long as it benefited him. He would go to no ends to accomplish something as long as it fueled his oversized ego. She'd screwed up and trusted the untrustworthy. Her stupidity was what hurt the most.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

He didn't know what he was going to say. All he knew was that they were words that needed to be said. He'd come into this wanting to get laid and had vowed that he wouldn't give up, not until he had been awarded the ultimate prize. If he had seen what would have become when he made that promise he would have most definently rethought his plan of attack.

The sound of his footsteps bounced back at him as he traced his steps through the empty corridors. He still didn't know which word he should use, but he figured that he should at least try to explain.

When she walked into the silent room all of his morals slipped away. His breath caught in his throat and all he wanted to do was rush over to her and kiss her. That would not be the answer to his problems. Just moments before he had promised to be kind but that was another promise broken as the words slipped unruly from his lips. He couldn't believe he was saying them. Sure he'd said things like it before, a lot of the time them being much worse but for some reason today's hit home.

As soon as he was done talking he rushed away. There was no point hanging around. It would only end badly, not that this already hadn't. As he walked steadily-one foot in front of the other-back to the common room he forced his mind to travel to different places. The Quidditch Final's tomorrow was and excellent choice but his mind would not budge.

Had he done the right thing? Of course not but it was necessary. His emotions had started getting involved like they never had before. And when emotions came into the picture it was time to distance yourselves and call it quits.

You're just a coward his head screamed at him and he couldn't deny it. It was true, he'd darted at the first hint of trouble and not even trouble at that. More like fear. He was scared of commitment? No of course he wasn't, not if the right person came around. Then why was he fretting over his decision so much? Was he really afraid of commitment that much? Nah he wasn't scared of anything. Except maybe having to see the Weasley girl the next day. Yes she could get quite scary. Oh well he would just have to throw himself into his game tomorrow. That would be easier said than done because he didn't know how much his conscience could play on a guy.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

"We won! We won! Who's the Best?-"

"We are."

"Yeeaahh!"

The cheering rang out through the grounds. Not a spot was immune to the constant celebrations of victory. The day had broken as cloudy and mild with little to no wind. Allowing for an almost perfect game. Or so the crowd thought until they witnessed the goings on of the two seekers. Both players didn't seem to have their usual intensity but nobody thought much of it. It had been a long and tiresome year for both young men. One had had an extensive row with his girlfriend in the middle of a crowded corridor before the game and the other hadn't been himself for the past few days. No make that the whole year.

Going into the game people had been placing their money on Gryffindor. Sure Slytherin had Malfoy but he was only as good as his ego would allow him to be. Harry on the other hand had the skill and the team to back him up. It would be a well fought battle in the end but Gryffindor would come out victorious.

All of the Gryffindor supporters were in for a surprise when Harry dove after the snitch but lost sight of it quickly. Malfoy had been right on his tale and they both pulled out of the dive seconds before they would have crashed painfully into the hard earth. Gasps rang out through the stand from both the red and green supporters. Nobody wanted to see their star players being carted off the field on a stretcher.

Nothing much happened for the better part of an hour. Goals were scored and then quickly the other team would seize the Quaffle and even up the score once again. It seemed that the two Seekers had completely forgotten about the game because other than their first dive it appeared that they hadn't seen the small Golden Snitch. Or maybe they just weren't looking. Fans began pointing up at the sky but it was not at a spectacular play. Instead they were pointing to two tiny dots floating high above the pitch. It looked like they were talking or more likely arguing but nobody could be for certain from such a distance.

Voices began to elevate in volume as people voiced their ideas to their neighbors. Was it a strategy? Nobody knew but they were keen on talking about it. Suddenly a cheer rang out and all eyes were once again focused on the game. Up in the sky from that ungodly height one of the tiny players began a perfect swan dive decent towards the ground. As the figure rapidly got closer the cheers grew louder as the fans noted the colour of the players uniform. He raised his hand into the air and in his tightly clasped fist he held a small struggling ball.

"We won!"

His team was the first upon him, they too were wondering about the events of the past few minutes.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

As Hermione watched the events of the Quidditch Game unfold she couldn't feel anything. She was completely numb. The harsh realities of what she had gotten herself into had emerged and she was less than thrilled about her as well as his attitude towards the whole thing. So as she watched the game she pondered what had happened and cheered that much harder ever time Gryffindor scored a goal. Those filthy Slytherin scumbags!

Hermione knew that Harry and Ginny hadn't been doing so well and she also knew that it directly resulted from her situation. She hadn't had the guts to tell either Harry or Ron what had happened. It was mortifying enough to be dumped so carelessly but to have someone be grateful that it had happened was heart wrenching.

Ginny had cornered Harry on his way to the game and told him to stop being so immature. He hadn't taken it well and as a result a screaming match between the two strong minded Gryffindor's followed. Ginny had stood her ground and Harry was the first to walk away saying that he was needed on the pitch. Ginny had stormed away in a huff, knocking a few innocent bystanders off their feet in her wake.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Up in the air Draco found himself watching Potter closer than usual and when he appeared along side him hundreds of feet up in the air it made him a tad bit nervous. From the look on Potter's face it was evident that he was not pleased and Draco was pretty sure he knew why but he couldn't show any weakness.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Harry demanded.

Draco swallowed and gently laid his hand by the pocket that his wand was in. He would not go down without a fight. No wait on second thought he wouldn't suffer, Potter would. Who did he think he was coming up here in the middle of the most important game of the year and demanding to know why he broke up with his so called girlfriend, "I'm playing Quidditch which is more than I can say about you Potter."

"Give it a rest Malfoy. We both know why we're here."

It was hard enough for Draco to concentrate on the game with his conscience constantly screaming at him to apologize and say he made a huge mistake, he didn't need this added on burden, "No why don't you enlighten me."

"Fine I will. You stay the hell away from Hermione. I don't know what you've said to her or what you've done but believe me this has got to stop."

"And why do you think your phony little threat is going to change my mind?"

That stumped Harry who went instantly silent. Draco internally gloated at the fact that Granger didn't share everything with Potter when he said "Oh and we broke up".

It was quite apparent from Harry's face that he still thought they were together.

Draco's minded was flooded with thoughts, so much so that he didn't notice Harry crouching down onto his broom and going into a steep dive. By the time he noticed it was to late. Draco put all his energy into directing the broom to fly perfectly but it was no use. Harry had his fist in the air and Draco was left empty handed.

He didn't know what made him do it but he found his eyes scanning the see of red in the stands. Somehow he found her. Amidst the standing crowd she was sitting somberly on the bench. No hint of emotion could be seen. Not joy at her teams victory or sorrow at their breakup. Their eyes met briefly but she was the first to break the connection. No sooner had she jumped up to join the Gryffindor's victory march onto the pitch. All prior things forgotten. At least so it appeared.

The Slytherins begrudgingly headed off the pitch and to the change rooms empty handed. Nobody could pay them enough to hang around. As Draco crossed the grass Harry stepped in front of him blocking his retreat.

"You know you could have had that."

"Had what?" he grumbled, yes he had to admit he was a sore loser.

"The snitch. It was right beside your broom. Not a foot away. Next time leave your emotions on the ground."

"Why are you telling me this?" Draco asked. It almost seemed as if Potter was trying to give him advice. There was no way he would have take any advice that Potter cooked up he told himself.

"Just thought you should know how close you were and how your in ability to direct your thoughts directly influences how your day goes," of course he wasn't giving advice, he was mocking him.

"Thanks for the insight," he stuck his shoulder out and plowed his way through the ever growing crowds. Instead of heading for the change rooms, he really didn't want to hear his Captain yelling at him for the next hour straight he decided to retreat to the castle where he could clean up and be alone. That's what he needed to do, he needed to think. Since he had told Hermione that it was over he couldn't get her out of his head. He felt horrible and he'd never ever felt horrible for doing anything. No regrets was his motto. So why was this any different? Why did he really break up with her? He asked himself these questions and many more and he hid throughout the castle for the rest of the day. No doubt the Gryffindors and probably even Hermione were already celebrating their victory upstairs. He had to move on, there was no way he could let this rule his life. He had better things to do than relish over a mudblood.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Unlike what Malfoy had thought Hermione had not headed upstairs to party. She had never been the partying type and she figured it was best for her to stay away. She was so unhappy at the moment and she didn't want to inflict her sorrows onto others or even worse take it out on the carefree party goers.

She stumbled into the library and found the most private table she could. It wasn't hard. The library was empty, nobody was into studying on the day of the Quidditch FInals. She pulled her book out of her back but quickly tossed it back when she noted which one it was. There was no way she could read one of her romances now. Not after what had just happened.

Lying her head down on the table felt like the best option and so she did. There with her eyes hidden in the deserted corner of the empty library she allowed the tears to come. She sobbed until their wasn't a single tear left in her and only then did sit back up. To her utmost relief the library was still deserted.

She hid out in the library until her stomach began to rumble, reminding her that she did need fuel to keep her going. Having no plans to sit in the Great Hall she headed down to the kitchens. The pear gave way to a door in which she stepped through and just as quickly turned back around, but not quick enough. His voice carried across the noise of pre dinner prep, "Fancy seeing you here."

She had two options, to run or to flee. Since the House Elves had blocked her easy escape she decided to ignore and grab some food. That wouldn't prove so easy because as soon as she sat down and was served a large bowl of soup he sat down opposite her, "I'm having a flashback," he mused.

"What are you a sodding idiot," she fumed, did he not remember what he had just told her or did he think she didn't remember.

"No, I'm thinking that I screwed up."

"That's nice to know but isn't it a little late for that?"

"Never to late to apologize so I'm sorry. What I said was totally uncalled for and I take it all back. So can we just go back to the way things were?"

"Of course," Hermione said.

"Really," shock was evident in his voice.

"Sure, status quo right? You can't stand me because I'm a mudblood Gryffindor who's better than you in class and you're an arrogant pin head who's ego is fueled by his families name. Sounds good? Great," she pushed her chair back quickly, sending it clattering across the floor. There was no way she was going to cry in front of him. She couldn't give him that pleasure. As her feet carried her throughout the corridors of Hogwarts she fought back the urge to vomit. Just by talking to her he had planted the seed of desire once again. Her body ached to be along side his and feel his tender kisses. She was glad she had run out when she had other wise she might have given into his lame apology. It was no evident that he was manipulative-something she had previously known-her heart was not disguising that fact any more. It would in turn take a lot more than a half hearted-if even-apology to win her trust back. She wasn't going to fall for his silly tricks again. She needed to keep her head clear and see him for what he was. He was so kind to her before though. How could he be such a nice and then such a horrible guy? No she had to keep her head on straight. He was not a nice guy. But what about...No remember not a nice guy. Oh boy this was going to be difficult.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n so this took a bit longer than usual and that would be a result from not having a day of in almost three weeks. I've had school or work or both and a ton of homework. So I'm pleased to finally have found the time to get this posted. I hope you enjoyed it, it seemed to me to be a bit rushed and not exactly what i had in my head but I know if i don't post now it could be weeks before I get the chance to again. Please review and tell me what you think. Remember that reviews help boost my will to write and i may just be able to slot some time in if you guys give me some decent feedback. Remember good or bad it doesn't matter. Cheers and thanks for reading.


	11. Pleas

Ginny was the first to find Hermione wandering around the deserted castle ten minutes before curfew. If it hadn't been for her, Hermione would have probably floated around all night. Harry had been the first one to notice Hermione's absence around dinner time. By that time the party was in full swing and the common room was filled to capacity. Harry had been mulling over Malfoy's words all day and finally decided that he should talk to Ginny. He owed her an apology. He found her dancing in the centre of the crowd with a drink in her hand and a smile on her face. She was dancing with a seventh year bloke and that made Harry fume. He knew what she was trying to do and much to her credit it was working. Pushing his way through the sweaty bodies he eventually found himself standing along side her.

The music was loud and the bass was deep and so his voice did little. Instead he had to lay his hand on her shoulder and physically spin her around. Her lips moved in protest but the words never reached his ears. He wrapped his hand tightly around her wrist and pulled her back to way he had come. When the portrait hole resealed, closing off all of the noise Harry began to talk, and Ginny started to complain, "Harry I'm glad you believe in something so strongly but give her a break. She knows what she's doing and she's a big girl. Now I feel like I'm just repeating myself so unless you have something important you'd like to tell me than I have to go back in. I promised Donnar that I would dance with him.

Harry's hand shot out instantaneously and grasped her arm, not allowing her to make her easy exit, "Ginny you're not going to dance with him," Harry pleaded.

"And to hell with what you think. If you don't have enough sense to realize..."

"Malfoy broke up with Hermione," Harry said in a rush. This halted Ginny in her tracks.

"What, no when?"

"Last night I believe."

"Crap!"

"What?"

"Where is she now? I thought she had just gone off with him. I haven't seen her since the match. Crap, crap, crap. We need to find her. Why didn't you tell me this sooner? She's been by herself all day then."

"Hey don't blame me," Harry held up his hands in defeat.

"We need to find her. Where could she be? You go and find Ron. We need to split up. Curfew's not very far away," she shouted her orders as she ran off down the corridor.

The first place she looked was the library but she saw no sign of Hermione, nor anyone else for that matter. This was going to be more difficult than she would have ever thought. With nobody wandering the castle she had nobody to ask if they had recently seen the brown hair Gryffindor. Where would I go if I was Hermione? Ginny asked herself. Of course after the library she'd probably go to the Room of Requirement. Then again maybe not after what had happened. The Room of Requirement may hold to many painful memories if she had just been dumped. Even though her gut was telling her that Hermione would not be there she felt like she had to cover all of her bases. Sure enough she didn't find her. Out of pure luck she found her. If she had have been a second later she would have missed her rounding the corner ahead of her.

"Hermione," Ginny called but that did no good. She started to walk fast in order to catch up to her but Hermione must have been walking at a pretty good pace because Ginny had to break into a jog to cover the distance between them, "Hermione stop," she called again and to her relief she did.

"Ginny I'm really not in the mood..."

"Come here," Ginny opened her arms to her friend and invited her in for a hug.

Hermione shook her head and held back the tears, "I'm so stupid Ginny."

"Oh honey you're not. He's just an idiot. All guys are."

"Harry's not but because of me you guys are having problems."

"That's not your fault. Harry and I just have some issues and it just happens that it's at the same time. Don't blame yourself for our problems."

"He told me that I don't deserve to be with him."

"He's just saying that Hermione, he doesn't deserve to be with somebody as great as you. He's and idiot and piece of scum."

"Believed him. I trusted him!"

"We all trust somebody. That's the hardest part about it, the fact that they broke our trust. I know it makes you feel mad at yourself. Well don't be."

Hermione and Ginny stood in the centre of the corridor and hugged. When Hermione's tears came once again they were joined by Ginny's. That's how Harry found them, both sobbing their eyes out and clinging to each other. He eased himself up alongside them and Ron rounded the opposite corner at the same time. Relief washed over both guys faces when they saw that Hermione had been found.

Neither Ginny nor Hermione paid any attention to the two new bodies beside them. Ginny kept murmuring to Hermione but none of it ceased either of their tears.

When Hermione pulled away from Ginny and wiped her eyes she noticed her friends. Ginny's make up had run and she tried to wipe it away, "Stupid stuff, it's not water proof esnough to stay on your eyes but it will tattoo to your skin," she laughed. That brought a smile to Hermione face.

s

Harry walked over to Ginny and gentler this time reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze. This time it was not a symbol of dominance and control but caring. Harry wrapped his other arm around Hermione and pulled her into a one armed hug, "I'm sorry about how I reacted earlier."

"You were right thought, weren't you?"

"Yeah but this doesn't seem much like and I told you so moment."

"I guess you're right," Hermione laughed.

"We're here for you honey," Ginny said.

"Always," Ron added, "And by the way I think a bit of retaliation is in order. He can't dump you like that and not expect to face the consequences."

"Amen," Harry added.

"Guys, no," Hermione said miserably, "Thanks but no."

"Aww," they moaned in unison, "That's no fun."

They were silenced by Ginny's look of dismay that she shot at them.

"Oh all right Mother," Ron mocked.

"If anybody's going to be doing anything it'll be me," Ginny said strongly.

"Why do you get to have all the fun?"

"I just want to talk to him."

"Guys I'm going up to bed. You can join me or you can stay here and argue over who gets to do something that none of you are doing. I just want to forget about all of this. The sooner I put it behind me the better."

The four friends headed back up to Gryffindor Tower. Hermione made her way through the crowd and everyone else followed closely behind her. At the bottom of the Girl's Staircase Hermione thanked each of her friends and told them that they should enjoy the party. She'd be fine. Although reluctantly they did return to the party. About a half hour later Ginny slipped away to go and check on her friend.

Upstairs Hermione had kicked off her clothes and pulled on her PJ's before slipping in between the sheets. All she wanted to do was fall asleep but that was going to prove harder than she expected. She hadn't gotten much sleep the night before and tonight didn't look to be much better. Her thoughts raced through her head. Some to quickly for her to even register what they were. All of them though had something to do with the 24 hours and what was to come. She fell into a restless sleep in which she tossed and turned. Dreams plagued her the entire night and she woke up in the morning to find her sheets in a tangled mess around her feet. Sweat covered her body and as she sat up she found that she was stiff. No the night had not been any better than the last one.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

One thing about the whole ordeal was a relief to Hermione. The fact that they hadn't made their relationship public. If they had she would have had a lot of people falling over her as class began once again on Tuesday. Hermione had spent the whole weekend either hiding out in her dorm or isolated in the back corner of the library. She became once again very close to Harry and closer to Ron than she'd ever thought possible after the events of the previous year.

The one thing she had been dreading all weekend was class. She knew that she would have to sit beside Malfoy in Defense and as much as she had hated him on the first day of school, that feeling was ten times stronger now. Her heart began to race as she neared the classroom. In only a few seconds she'd have to sit down beside him. At least she could act like she hated him and nobody would know the difference.

To her relief he wasn't anywhere to be seen when she emerged through the doorway. Class started and she still couldn't see him. Where could he be? The answer came when half way through class the door banged open and in stormed Malfoy. Snape glanced up at him and gave him a nod as he found his seat. If that had been any other student, particularly a Gryffindor they would have been given minimum a weeks detention. Probably even more because of how late they were.

Malfoy pulled out his seat and threw his books down on the table, rattling Hermione's open ink well and sloshing ink dangerously close to the edge. Her hand shot out to steady it and a small droplet landed on her thumb. She scratched it off but that was the only movement she made that told that she even noticed his entrance.

After class ended Hermione scooped up her books but was shocked to feel them slipping out of her grasp. Nothing she could do would support them and they clattered to the floor, sending parchment in all different directions, "Crap," she cursed softly as she bent down to retrieve that scattered debris. The only answer to why such a thing had happened was somebody had put their wand on her. She knew it was and she wasn't pleased. By the time she stood up the classroom was empty except for one body. Even Snape had disappeared out the back way.

"What's your problem?" she demanded. She was not concerned with the level of her voice. Any passers by would just see the face value of their argument. Not what fueled it.

"My problem, what about yours?"

"You think you can go and say what you did and then expect everything to be all peachy. Well I've got news for you."

"Oh really now. You said status quo so that's what this is."

"I'm sorry about this."

This confused Malfoy and he quickly shut his mouth as he processed what she had just said, "You're sorry. But you didn't break up with me. Why are you sorry?"

"That you're such a pig. That I trusted you and you took that trust and stamped it into small pieces," she screamed, "You broke me heart," she said this a little quieter as to not alert anybody to the real reason they were bickering, "You broke my heart. I thought you'd changed. I gave you the benefit of the doubt and believed that people are all good. You shot that theory down and I'm finished with you. I don't want to think of you, I don't want to see you ever again."

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Draco's intent had been to try and talk things through with Hermione. He knew that she would not willingly stop and talk to him so he forced her to. Ever since he had ended their relationship he'd regretted it. Whether it was disappointment with himself for not following through with his own promise of getting her in his bed or hurting her like he did he couldn't quite decide. His conscience was leaning towards the later though. Every chance he had he found him mentally kicking himself. No matter what his prior opinions on her had been they had turned out to be false. She wasn't just a know it all bookworm.

When Hermione screamed at him that she was sorry he had been puzzled. If his memory served him correctly it had been he not she who had caused this turmoil. Her explanation had made sense when she took the time to explain it to him. All she stood across form him telling her side of the story all he felt was remorse. He wanted to apologize to her, wrap her in his arms and comfort her and promise her that he would never do such a thing again. What was a promise though? He'd promised himself that he would get laid and he'd broken that promise to himself. If he couldn't keep a promise that benefited himself how was he supposed to keep one for somebody else?

Draco wanted to apologize and make things right but he knew that she wasn't stupid. She didn't trust him and he didn't blame her. He didn't trust himself very much right at the moment. If he was going resolve what he'd done he'd have to earn back her trust. He'd thought that had been hard at the start of the year but this was going to be much worse. He'd swayed her opinion on him before but then she'd not been hurt by him like she'd been now. It would be difficult but he knew that in the end it would be worth it. He couldn't bear seeing her like this. Watching her from across and empty room or a crowded corridor and knowing that she was not his. She'd changed so much over the past year and he knew he wasn't immune to those changes either. He was no longer such a narrow minded individual. He was positive he and Hermione would settle their differences. All couple's had arguments and they weren't immune. The only difference was whose pride would have to be brushed aside and they'd have to work a lot harder. The world was against them.

So Draco said to Hermione as she stormed out the door, "I'm really sorry. You probably don't believe that and I wouldn't either if I was in your shoes. I was a complete idiot. I know you don't trust me right now and I to be quite frank I don't trust myself either," he didn't know if she was actually listening but he had accomplished getting her to stop in her tracks on the way to the door so he continued, "We're so different but so very much a like. I'll be the first to admit I panicked when I realized how great everything was going. I'm not asking you to forgive me right now. I know you won't be able to. I said some awful things but I hope you can see it in your heart to some day come back so we can work this out. I'll never forgive myself if I knew that I'd ruined everything here," there his pride was the first to be washed down the drain. Hermione had no plans of sending hers with it because as Draco stopped speaking she crossed the distance between herself and the door and walked out into the corridor, leaving Draco standing stunned and confused. The slamming of the door was like throwing the key to his cell away. He'd tried and he'd keep on trying.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n so a quick update here. I had a couple of reviews which I'd like to send out a thank you. You guys got my head spinning with what you said and I knew I couldn't wait very long to get my ideas down. So thanks and I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Remember Please Review. Cheers


	12. Emotions

He didn't know what he was going to do, all he knew was that he had to do something. Anything really would be better than the situation he was in at the moment. After spending all of his free time with Hermione over the past year he had come to neglect his friends. The in turn had moved on without him. The only ones to hurry back to his side as if nothing had changed were Crabbe and Goyle.

"Hey guys," Draco said glumly to them as he slumped into the Slytherin Common Room.

Both guys nodded at him eagerly but did not say a word which only depressed Draco more. He needed somebody he could discuss this with. Not ask for advice because a Malfoy never asked for advice, they only gave it, just somebody for him to rant to. He found it in the form of a very unwilling Nott. Draco flopped down into the chair next to his studying classmate and started talking. Nott who would take any excuse to not study eagerly perked up when he saw the distraction.

"What's up man, no offense but you look like absolute crap?" Nott commented.

"Thanks mate, means a lot to me you know?"

"No probs. So what's up, you haven't been quite yourself for awhile."

"Just a chick."

"Really, care to share the name of the lucky lady?"

"No I'd rather not, I just broke up with her and all."

"Aww that sucks. What did you get tired of her? Was she no good?" he winked.

"You know what I'm really tired, I think I'm going to head up to bed," in all honesty he couldn't stand talking to Nott for a second longer. After being with Hermione he now understood what she meant when she said that Slytherin's were shallow and stupid.

"Whatever, night."

Once in the safety of his dorm he let his mind wander. He needed to come up with a plan and one that would have no holes in it this time. Last time his ultimate goal had been to get laid. Now that would be nice, no better than nice but not his main priority. As he drifted off into sleep he couldn't help but chuckle at how his world had changed and all because of a girl.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Was she being stupid? He had apologized to her, told her that he really cared for her and everything that he had done was a mistake. No she kept repeating to her ever nagging conscience, he was arrogant and manipulative and would stop at nothing to get what he wanted. All that he had said was just a hoax, a hoax to earn back her weakened trust so he could claim the ultimate prize. She had been stupid once, falling for him and she was not going to repeat that mistake. But what if he honestly was sorry?

Another day of classes was upon the students of Hogwarts and the weather was starting to become warmer. Girls had ditched their ugly but warm dark leggings for elegant pairs of cream and beige panty hoes. Their sweaters had also come off leaving only their blouses which revealed their curves nicely. Ginny had been delighted at the prospect of the warmer weather but Hermione had mixed emotions.

"Just do it," Ginny groaned as Hermione debated over her uniform.

"But."

Ginny stormed over to her friends trunk and fished around until she found what she had been looking for, "You want to get his attention, but if not him that you're sure to catch someone else's."

"Ginny I don't want to catch his attention again. It was all a mistake," as the words poured out of her mouth she knew that they were not true. As much as she hated him, hated herself for what had happened she still harbored a tiny speck of hope that maybe someday, somehow they could replenish their relationship. That's what her heart felt, her head kept telling her that he was an idiot. Her heart was winning that battle and so did Ginny. Hermione pulled on the panty hoes and had them almost up to her waist when her finger caught behind her knee and toar a large gauche out of them.

"Shit, that's my last pair," Hermione moaned, great just great now what was she supposed to do. Now that she had it in her head she was dressing up their was no going back to her frump girl appearance.

"Go without," Ginny said smugly.

"No way, only the girls that are really asking for it go bare legged."

"So you're asking for it. You want him Hermione. I know you do so don't tell me otherwise. Go for it."

"I look like a slut."

"No you look very good now shut your trap and get dressed," she shoved the rest of her uniform into her outstretched hands and sat down on the nearest bed to wait. When Hermione was done she looked amazing.

"You go girl, their is absolutely no way he's not going to drool when he sees you, or maybe something else will happen if you know what I mean."

"Ginny," Hermione squealed.

"I'm just saying," she held up her hands and shrugged, "Now let's go I'm starving and would like to catch a few minutes of breakfast."

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Breakfast was a dismal affair as it always was to Draco. Morning would come much to early and bring with it a new wave of classes, assignments and homework. Now he had to deal with the added on burden of Granger walking no strutting into the Great Hall looking absolutely...sexy!

His glob of eggs that he had currently been swallowing found a new home in his throat and he hunched over as he tried to cough it out. He was too preoccupied with unclogging his airway that he didn't see the small sideways glance that was directed in his direction by the Weasley girl, nor how Granger completely head strong did not so much as glance over at the Slytherin Table.

"Smokin' in here today isn't it?" Zambini laughed as he fanned himself. Everyone around them roared with laughter and Draco added, "Yeah if you like that sort of thing," it made him angry that other guys, especially the ones that were his so called friends were looking at Granger like they were. Whatever happened to Gryffindor's being the enemy? Everything was so much easier when Granger wasn't so...well hot! It was much to Draco's relief when every one shifted uncomfortably in their seats and went quite back to eating their now cold toast.

With all eyes now on their owner's plates Draco felt that it was safe enough to sneak a glance over towards the forbidden territory of the Gryffindor Table. It was at that time that he again thanked Merlin that they had kept their relationship a secret. He knew he couldn't deal with all the stares and glares if they had of revealed what they were doing.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

She was confused. A part of her was telling her that she wanted him, that maybe she loved him. The other part was nagging that that was not true and so when she walked into Defense she felt like crying. He was already seated in his chair, two legs on the ground as he dangerously teetered between two different places. So much like herself. She couldn't help it as she walked over to him she threw her stuff down on the floor with

a loud crack. Apparently her ink bottle wasn't as protected as she had thought. Scrambling to save her work and books before it became drenched she emptied the bag onto the desk, spreading sticky parchment, textbooks, a couple of empty gum wrappers and a tampon. Great just her luck. She watched as Malfoy's eyes flipped from her to her pile of junk and then landed on the tampon. He made no move to assist her in her clean up for which she was relieved. Her hand hastily shot out and grabbed the tampon and shoved it into her robe's pocket.

Once she found the root of the problem-the bottle had shattered into small glass shards-she set out to do damage control. Her charms essay was a complete loss but it could have been worse. At least she'd only had a few lines written on it. The rest was all in note form on another sheet of parchment. The rest of the parchment was salvageable but only just. The whole time she kept sneaking glances out of the corner of her eye at Malfoy. Since studying the contents of her upturned bag he hadn't removed his eyes from the front of the classroom.

"You could at least have the decency to help me," she hissed, "Or are you to good for that?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" he shot bag.

Thrilled that she had least gotten a response from his otherwise stone cold person, "We both know the only reason you ended it was because I wasn't up to par with what you're family would think to be suitable."

"Really is that what you think?"

"It's exactly what I think."

"Well I'm sorry you feel that way," with that he turned back to staring at the front of the classroom.

Class wasn't due to start for a couple more minutes so Hermione grabbed what was left of her bag and rushed out the door. She heard Harry and Ron calling after her but she didn't turn back. There was no way she would let anybody see her cry.

Making to the bathroom just in time she slammed the door on one of the cubicles and sat down on the toilet and let out a choked sob. He was an idiot. An absolute idiot and a complete waste of her time. Her chest felt like it was about to tear apart as she choked out a strangled sob. Knowing she wouldn't be in any state to go back to class, she was glad she had grabbed her stuff. Most girls wanted their best friend at a time like this but Hermione was glad for the peacefulness of the empty bathroom. What was she supposed to do? There was no way she could keep dodging him; Hogwarts was big but sadly not that big. Also she couldn't just stop going to classes that he was in. Why had she let herself get into this sort of situation?

Maybe the easiest thing, although not the right one was to give in and see where that took them. It was obvious that they both still had feelings if their petty arguments had anything to say. Deciding that the next time she saw him she'd try to start the long process of healing the stinging wound. Right now she had a more pressing matter on her hands. Was it better to completely ditch Defense or would she be better off to walk in half way through class? Both wouldn't be pleasant but she reasoned that if she had to deal with Snape today she would probably jump off the Astronomy Tower. And so she stayed in the bathroom until class ended and then she wiped her eyes clear, splashed water on her face and headed to her next class.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n well things may be looking up now. This was in my opinion the worst chapter yet. It went nowhere but it was necessary for what is to come. Please review and that'll help me get motivated to update sooner. I'm so busy now but I can always find a few spare minutes. Cheers


	13. Virginity

"I'm going to be civil, I'm going to be civil to her," to most it would seem like an odd reminder but to Draco it was highly necessary. He hadn't slept the previous night. After seeing how his words had hurt her enough to flee from their about to commence class his mind had been plagued by guilt ridden thoughts. It was true, he still cared for her. Otherwise why was he thinking such things? The only answer was he still cared deeply and that terrified him. Breaking up with her was supposed to end that; instead it had just relit his feelings.

The last thing he wanted to do was to send her scurrying for cover again. That was not the way to fix things and so the chanting resumed as he walked into Defense, "I must be civil, I have to be civil to her."

He feared she wouldn't show up. If it had have been any other girl she would have simply not gone to class. He knew Hermione wasn't like that and so when she raced into class just as Snape was about to close the door a little part of him breathed a sigh of relief.

"You're late Ms. Granger," Snape said in his cold monotone that scare eighty percent of the student body, but fascinated the other percentage.

"Close, but not completely," she shot back. It was a different side of her. One Draco had just begun to see from her, but the public rarely saw.

Snape not being used to the newer feisty Hermione merely nodded and turned back to the class. Almost as if it was an afterthought which it probably was he said, "Don't think you can skip my class and run in late all in the same week. I won't stand for it."

Hermione darted to her seat and let out a sigh of relief as she safely sat down. She didn't as much as look at Draco as all of the events unfolded.

"Now open you're books to page eight hundred and thirty four," Snape bellowed from the head of the classroom. His request was followed by a split second of shuffling as people unearthed their large textbooks and then silence.

They were assigned to read forty pages of the text and then answer a series of long winded questions, all without talking before class ended. Leaving Draco no opportunity to try to mend his and Hermione's fractured relationship.

Each second that ticked by was excruciating to Draco who had once enjoyed Snape's classes. When Snape stood up to tell them that they were dismissed Hermione was the first out of the classroom. Across the room Draco noticed Weasley and Potter shooting each other confused looks as they watched the back end of their friend vanish through the open doorway.

Now was his chance, she was all alone. He threw his belongings in his bag and rushed after her. He caught up to her as she was rounding the second corner. His hand snagged her elbow and she whirled around with a look of pure contempt on her face, "Get your filthy hands off of me," she scorned.

"No, we need to talk."

"You've had you're chance, many times," her expression changed to one of sadness and Draco knew he'd won.

"Come, please," he pulled her limp form into a broom closet and quickly sealed the door with a locking spell. It was beyond him why the staff had yet to lock the broom closet. He had a feeling though that it was that old fool Dumbledore that caused the schools prime snogging places to stay open to the student body. It suited him fine because he'd done more than snog in the broom closets throughout the castle.

Hermione stared up at him earnestly as she waited for him to speak.

Draco took a deep breath. No pressure at all but if he screwed up now he knew he'd never win her back, "I guess I'll start off by saying that I'm sorry."

"Oh really-"

He held up a hand to stop her and then continued on with his apology, "-I haven't been able to sleep since we've broken up. My stomachs been in knots and my heads been kicking at me from the inside. I was stupid," he let out his breath with a soft whoosh and then took another large one and continued on, "I know how much I've hurt you and if you think for one second that this hasn't hurt me than you're wrong. It's quite nearly killed me. I'm not who or what you may think I am. My priorities in life have changed so much since I've met you. You're a beautiful breath of fresh air to me," he knew that he'd accomplished his goal when he saw the tears begin to stream down her face. He reached a hand out and carefully wiped them away.

"I want to believe you Draco," she whispered and her voice cracked as she spoke, "I want to so much."

His heart sank as she uttered those words, "Please give me another chance. I know I don't deserve it but I really want to try again. I've missed you so much. Seeing you walk away from and knowing that I won't get to hold you again…" he shook his head. As he said it he couldn't believe it. His eyes had started to pool up. What a wuss he was. He squeezed his eyes shut. She would never forgive him now when she saw how much of a wimp he was. He'd ruined his chance and he had been so close.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Hermione couldn't believe her eyes. In the dim light that was sneaking its way under the door she thought she saw something sparkle on Draco's cheek. There was no way he was crying, or was there? Sure enough as she leaned closer she was reassured that he was indeed crying. She couldn't help herself then, she wrapped her arms around him and pulled him close, "I'm sorry too," she murmured, "For being so stupid. I wanted to trust you so badly but I couldn't. I'm so stupid."

"Well at least we're both on the same page there," he chuckled, "You're forgiven."

"And you as well. Let's put this behind us shall we?"

"Agreed, now do we really have to go to class?"

"Oh no! We forgot about class," she scrambled to her feet and opened the door. Before he knew it she was gone, but this time he had the comfort that again she would rest in his arms.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

The sky was bluer, the clouds crisper as Draco went for a break time stroll throughout the Hogwarts grounds. He was tired of being imprisoned indoors as classes went on per usual. He was in such a delightful mood that he didn't even glare at a measly second year when she cut him off. Fear washed over her face when she saw her the victim of her carelessness was. Prepared to be ridiculed she braced herself but the scorn never came. Draco was off in another world. One where he and Hermione could publicize their relationship without fear. It was a hope. One day hopefully the war would end and nobody would have to live in fear. It was after all in Draco's opinion a damn stupid war. It wasn't that he didn't believe in the cause because for sixteen years of his life he had it was just that he'd come to realize that maybe their was more to life than pledging your life to one hypocritical man. Nevertheless somethings had to be done and they may not always be pleasant. This thought brought back the imagine of when they were to go public with their relationship. Just the thought of his father and mother's faces made him cringe. No better leave that one truth hidden for the time being.

There was only fifteen minutes before he had to return into the din of the castle for rest of his afternoon classes. History of Magic and the Arithmacy. Both classes he shared with Hermione. Them both being top of their class had pretty much assured their spots in the toughest classes the school had to offer. As he strolled lazily across the grass he soaked up the warm rays of the sun and wished that he and Hermione could spend more time together. He hoped that she would be enthusiastic in resuming their evening meetings. Then again exams were steadily drawing nearer and she would most likely lock herself away in the library. He also had a lot of stuff to do. He was being pushed from so many angles it felt like the world was crashing in on himself.

Risks would have to be taken.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Her feet thudded down on the stone steps as she raced outside. Apparently not the only one to be thinking the same thoughts it appeared that the whole castle had emptied as students mingled outside wasting their ever precious break time. Eyes scanning the hoards of people from above she searched for anybody that she knew. Right away her eyes pin pointed on the mass of platinum hair that she had run her hands through to many times to count. As much as she'd like to she would not be able to run over to him and jump into his arms. With a slight sigh she went back to her searching. Ginny and Harry were walking alone by the lake but it looked like a pretty intimate moment so Hermione decided not to go over and intrude. At last she saw Ron. Thank god. Her pace quickened as she headed straight for him. When he saw her approaching his face lit up and he gave a short wave which she returned.

"Hey stranger," she greeted.

"Couldn't have said it better myself," he joked, "Grab a seat."

The seat happened to be a plot of green grass but who was she to complain so she gratefully sat down, "Looks like every things working out well for Harry and Gin," Hermione commented.

"Yeah well," Ron shrugged.

"I know awkward."

"Only a little. You know I think it's pretty rough on Harry. It seems that he bite's his tongue a lot when we're talking. One minute he's talking about Ginny and then the next second he's gone quite or quickly changes the subject."

"Yeah I know what you mean, like he wants to tell you something because you're his best mate and all but then he remembers that you're her older brother," Hermione thought out loud.

"Exactly. He did slip up once."

"Oh?" It may have been a harmless single word but behind it a million questions posed waiting to be answered. What had Harry let slip that Ginny hadn't told her best friend. Or was it really something that big.

"Yeah you probably know and all being like her best girlfriend and all but Harry walked in one night late. Really late I mean. It was probably one in the morning but I had been up to go to the bathroom. He snuck into the dorm and I saw him throw his invisibility cloak into the bottom of his trunk. It didn't seem that strange at first but then I noticed how he was still wearing his uniform and his shirt was a bit of a mess and his tie looked like it had been thrown on as an after thought."

Hermione was shaking her head in disgust that Ginny had never mentioned such an important milestone to her. They were supposed to tell each other everything, "When was this?" she asked.

"A couple of months ago, maybe January," Ron shrugged.

It all fell into place now. At that point Hermione and Draco had been spending every free moment together and Hermione had seen very little of her friends. But still some things should always be revealed.

"Go on."

"Yeah so I commented on his disheveled look and he grinned and sat flat out mate I've just had the most amazing night ever now shut your trap because Ginny and I finally slept together. Oh my god it was absolutely amazing. You would never believe it. His face fell at that point and he looked scared for a split second. I congratulated him and then went back to bed. I think that surprised him. He thought that I was about to rip out his throat and truth be told I was. Come on she's my baby sister and only fifteen. Like what if he knocked her up or something. She's fifteen."

Hermione rested a hand on the distraught red head's arm, "She'll be fine Ron. She's mature enough and so is Harry. They'll make sure that doesn't happen," the whole time she said that her mind was spinning. Ginny was no longer a virgin. It seemed almost surreal. Of course she knew that girls her age were having sex. She also knew that her boyfriend was quite a player but up until then none of that had really sunk in. It had always been simply something irrelevant to her at the time. She'd at times suspected that Ginny might have but always brushed those thoughts quickly to the side, reasoning that Ginny would have for sure told her if something that major happened.

By the look on her face Ron must have known that something was up, "She never told you did she?" he asked softly.

Hermione shrugged, "Something must have..." there was no excuse really, "I'm proud of you," was what she managed.

"Me why?"

"Older brother finding out his little sis just slept with his best friend, you handled it pretty well. Did you and Harry ever talk after that?"

"We haven't been as friendly as we used to be."

Hermione hadn't noticed that either. Surely something as drastic as two of her friends not being that close any more would have caught her attention. Maybe it had, "I guess I just wrote off your distance as you giving them space to be a couple."

"Face it Hermione, you and Malfoy were to preoccupied with each other to see that it was no longer summer. The Hogwarts Express could have crashed into you and you would have continued to look on unfazed by any of it. This may not be news to you but if truth be told I'm really happy you guys broke up."

Oh dear not this again. How was she supposed to break it to him that in fact they were back together again, since oh two hours before? Gently was the first word that came to mind but then another one that worked better swiftly followed. Later.

"Excuse me for a sec," Hermione didn't wait for a reply. Instead she jumped to her feet and hurdled down the hill to the approaching forms of Harry and Ginny, "Hey Harry mind if I steal Ginny for a just a moment?" again not waiting for a reply she snagged Ginny's arm and pulled her away. Once out of earshot Hermione let the fireworks fly.

When she finished Ginny looked at her apologetically and said, "Now how you say it it sounds so horrible. You make it sound like I'm a bitch and a horrible friend."

That's true Hermione wanted to say but she held back.

"I did it for a reason."

"Oh and what's that?" Hermione asked skeptically.

"You," she muttered, "At the time you had just been talking about how'd you'd never been kissed and then almost the next day you went and took care of that. I was worried that if I told you what I'd done you would have felt like...basically I didn't want you to feel horrible again or go and do something rash that you would later regret."

"So let me get this straight. You didn't tell me because you thought I'd get depressed that you'd beat me once again to a milestone and so you hid it from me?"

"Pretty much," Ginny replied glumly, "I kinda realize now that it probably didn't help matters in the long run. You're probably more mad at me that you ever would have been."

"No so much mad but in shock. I always thought I'd hear such big news from you, and not from your brother..."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Ginny screamed.

Hermione stepped back as if she'd been hit. Ginny's shriek hit hard enough to be like a slap.

"Ron knows?"

"Well...ah...yeah."

"Who the hell told him?"

"Ahh...yeah..."

"Hermione tell me because that person is probably resting at the bottom of the lake right now and Harry's going to have a place right beside them."

"It was Harry. He kind of let it slip."

"When?"

"Well from what Ron said, right after."

"Shit, shit, shit I am so dead."

"Cool it. He hasn't done anything so far and he's known for awhile."

"I guess you're right," Ginny said quieter than before.

"Are you going to tell me about it?"

"Yeah sure, if you want. But later, let's get to class."

With that they headed back inside for the second half of their afternoon.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

Draco had slipped her a note that instructed her to meet him in their usual spot at the usual time. She was a bit hesitant at first because she didn't want him to think that everything that had happened between them could just be erased. Her body had another idea. As she slipped into the cozy room of requirements all of her past morals slipped away. She swept over to him and admired him sitting in the winged backed chair. He looked so handsome and sexy. Only now she fully understood Ginny's reasoning for keeping her excersions quite. Hermione indeed felt a need to prove herself. If it wasn't for her fear of the outcome she probably would have ripped of her clothes and jumped on her obviously enthused boyfriend. Should she do it? It was a question that had haunted her for quite some time. Would she feel ready or would she just have to dive in. Now that she knew that Ginny had done it her confidence but also her competitiveness had become elevated. How long would Draco wait around if she didn't give him the pleasure that he was searching for. Guys may say it wasn't about the sex but every girl knew it was.

"Come here," he drawled.

She didn't need one more bit of encouragement. Maybe she wasn't ready to go all the way but she could sure get close.

Hoping it looked as sexy as she wanted it to she strutted over to him and sat down on his lap. With both hands she pulled his face close to hers and drew his lips into a long and sensual kiss. Minutes passed before he pulled away, "Hermione."

"Shut up," she murmured as she drew him into another kiss.

He turned his head abruptly and at the same time pushed her back.

"What was that for?" she demanded. The venom in her voice disguised the hurt that fought to seep through.

"We just go back together. What are you trying to do? We should be taking this slow."

strange words coming out of his mouth. When she thought about it they should really be coming from hers, "I'm tired of waiting. What's your probably. Isn't that what you've been trying to do since we got together, get in my pants?"

He stared at her completely stunned and she took the opportunity to lean in and secure his lips yet again.

"Hermione," he pushed her away again but this time stood up abruptly and she fell off of his lap. Luckily she managed to catch herself before she landed on the floor.

'What's your problem?" Hermione fumed.

That was a good question and one he didn't quite know the answer to but he attempted to answer, "You're not ready."

"And you're the one that gets to say that. How do you know what I'm feeling. Maybe I've been ready for a long time."

"Hermione you're not."

"Don't tell me what I am or aren't."

"You're not ready. You don't have to sleep with me so I'll stay with you. I don't know what's gotten into your head but you aren't like those other girls. You can think for yourself so by go show me for a change that you can. You don't want to do this and I don't think I could live with myself if I forced you to. You don't need to use sex as an allure."

She shook her head in protest, "I want to, I'm ready to," she lunged at him and trailed kissed across his lips and down his neck.

It took all of his strength to push her off. His body was aching for her but he knew that it wouldn't be right.

Hermione felt his eagerness growing next to her leg. It wasn't the first time she'd felt it and she remembered what had happened after that one night. He had been all to eager to rip her shirt off but she had protested and pushed him away saying that she wasn't ready. He'd stood up and stormed out of the room yelling back at her that she was simply a tease and a coward, so what caused their roles to become switched. Previously she'd pushed him away and now he to her.

"I'm going to go," he said softly, as the minutes progressed his erection was growing more painful and it was taking more and more of his energy not to ravage her right there on the floor.

"Why can't you stay?" she asked quietly.

"Hermione you may not realize it but I do, you aren't ready and I really don't want to force it upon you and if I hang around much longer I really don't think I'll be able to control myself."

She reached for his arm and with one final attempt stated her closing argument, "I can't let you. If you're going to do that for me than the least I can do for you is stop you. Honestly I don't think I'll ever be ready but now is as good a time as any."

Draco shook his head, "No it's not, we just got back together again. For the past little while you've wanted to slit my throat and now you want to loose your virginity to me."

Hermione openly cringed at the sound of that, "Draco I don't want to be classified as the goody two shoed, bookworm Granger. I'm tired of being the innocent and pure one so please just do the one thing for me. I don't want to be a virgin anymore. I want to be with you."

Nothing more could be said and his strength was dwindling so he kissed her quickly on the cheek and without another word scurried out of the room. With a sharp bang of the door which seemed fitting Hermione sank into the chair Draco had only minutes before vacated and sobbed. He was right she wasn't ready but like she said she was through with being the virgin.

xxx.:.x.:.xxx

a/n whew I'm quite proud of this chapter actually. Between helping make and then eat Turkey Dinner I managed to write this chapter. After the last few chapters of trying to write some heavy emotions which I might add I am not so good at I'm glad to finally write some action. Yeah this story feels like once again it is going somewhere. Back to the usual laddy dah now. Hoped you liked this chapter and a reminder that my time right now his highly limited and I need motivation to fill my few spare moments with writing and reviews work nicely at accomplishing that. So please review. Cheers.


	14. Time

a/n just a brief warning that this chapter is where this story really changes to the rating M. If you don't like that sort of stuff don't read it. If you do read please enjoy. :)

xxx.:.x.

Books. They were everywhere. In piles at her feet, lying three opened on top of each other on the table top and to on her lap. One securely pushed up against the table and one hugged tightly to her chest. Now was not the time for interruptions but she had little control over it. On top of her smothering load of homework, reviews and test prep she had an added dilemma. It was one that had been hanging over her head and shooting painful reminders at her every time her brain took a breath. It was one of the reasons that she'd refused to allow herself to slow down over the previous month. Exams were almost upon them but they were just school exams. Not like the previous year when they were official ministry exams. Although she had made it so that she was busy now then she was a year previous. What she was trying to block was her stupidity.

The night after she and Draco had resumed their testy relationship she had done something that made her blush to this day, a month later. Sometimes she still found it hard to look directly in his eyes. It would have been wonderful for her to pass her stupidity as having to much to drink, because that was what it sure looked like. Sadly that was not the case.

Ever since Draco had not commented on Hermione's erratic behavior. He had simply gone on as if nothing had happened. That bothered Hermione. If anything she wanted him to talk about it, get it out in the open and be done with it. She was a guilty child who knew that confessing to eating the last cookie would be easier than lying.

Every night thoughts of why she'd done what she did haunted her and she didn't have to dig to deeply to understand her motive. It still plagued her every night and Ginny hadn't been all that willing to talk. Something else that had bothered Hermione. While she was back with Draco and happy about that she was regretting what it had cost her. Her evenings were once again spent in the Room of Requirement curled up in a snog session with her blond haired boyfriend. The rest of her spare time was devoted to studying. Causing her to not have had a good time with her friends in a very long time. She was going to change that. Friends had to come before boyfriends right?

Her mind told her yes so because it was a Friday night and she had told Draco she had to catch up on all the weeks homework that she'd already pushed aside to see him she wouldn't be able to meet up with him. A perfect time to make up with her friends. Her homework could wait another night. As she was cleaning up her rather large occupation of the library a brightness caught her attention skirting between the bookshelves. He appeared on the opposite end of the table and quickly mouthed an invitation to her. One that he thought she wouldn't be able to ignore. What he didn't know was that she had her mind set to do something else and nothing or nobody was going to change that. She abruptly turned him down which drew a hurt expression. Voices began getting louder as their hosts drew nearer. Draco shook his head and then was gone.

Hermione sighed, just what she needed an angry boyfriend would make this day so worthwhile.

Ten minutes later she was making her way through the intricate maze of the Hogwart's corridor system to the Gryffindor Tower. She knew that Harry and Ginny were probably off in a broom closet somewhere doing more than just snogging but Ron would most likely be in the Common Room. To her surprise and delight she walked in to see Harry and Ron in the middle of an intense battle between their white and black chess pieces and which Ginny was watching intently.

"Hey guys," Hermione greeted.

Her friends faces all registered looks of shock as their heads shot up at the sound of her voice. It was a voice they'd heard very little of lately and had passed it off as Hermione's usual pre exam paranoia. Even Ginny didn't know that Hermione's absence was once again attributed to her secret relationship. Hermione had not felt any need to tell her after being denied the most exciting news of Ginny's life.

"What are you guy's up to tonight?"

"Relaxing," Ron said as he commanded one of his men to move across the chess board in a pattern that Hermione didn't bother to try and understand. Chess simply annoyed her.

"Mind if I join you in the spectator section?" Hermione asked Ginny.

"One day we'll figure out a way to teach you how to play," Ron shook his head in defeat, "Until then it's a hopeless cause."

"Thanks a lot."

The night wore on and half and hour before curfew Harry and Ron came to the combined decision that they were hungry and a trip to the kitchen's was in order. The four Gryffindors packed up their belongings and headed downstairs. Their laughter echoed back at them as it bounced off the stone walls. They didn't meet up with anybody on their trip down, it was on the way back up. They'd just rounded the corner on the landing where they had to transfer over from the marble staircase to one of the smaller back staircases. The Marble Staircase would take them all the way back up to the Gryffindor Tower but it was a longer trip. Hermione instantly stopped when she saw who it was and she wasn't alone. Harry and Ron stopped so abruptly that poor Ginny he was following closely behind them ran into the back of her brother and went flying backwards.

Great just what she needed right now, another confrontation.

"Evening Potter, since you aren't a Prefect I'd like to remind you that while the other three here are permitted to be outside their dorms after curfew you are in fact not allowed."

"Thanks for the reminder Malfoy, but I think it would do you some good to..." Harry shot back but was cut off by Hermione.

"Come on guys let's just go."

Ginny looked over at Hermione sadly. From the looks of things Hermione wasn't taking this encounter to badly considering they'd had a history together.

Malfoy saw her and made eye contact with her. It was then that Hermione knew she was in for some trouble, there was no way that Malfoy was going to let her get out of this one without a hitch.

"I thought you had homework to do Granger," he resorted back to her last name making her cringe. She hadn't realized how much she liked hearing her name roll of his tongue until it was gone.

"Why does that concern you Malfoy? If I were you I'd be thinking a bit more about my own work instead of somebody else's," she hoped that he would get the hint that this was neither the time or the place.

"Oh you know Granger, when you turn a guy down because you say you have homework at least follow through with it. Instead of running off on the brink of curfew with your friends."

Her shoulders sagged as everyone spun to look at her and then back to Malfoy, confusion etched on their faces.

"And again why does it concern you what I'm doing."

"I don't know, maybe it has something to do with when you're sleeping with me it starts to concern..."

Hermione was over to him in a second and her hand was raised. She could normally contain her anger and always had been able to come up with some witty reply but now words failed her. She couldn't tell if he was acting and she was supposed to act along or if he was trying to make her life difficult. All she knew was that she needed to save face and so the only way to do that was to...

"Bitch," he seethed as his hand grasped his face where a hand print was already forming. He grabbed her robes and pulled her close making it look like he was whispering a warning in her ear. Instead he murmured, "Same time, the offer still stands. Nice work there. I must say you do have some acting ability," he let go of her and sent her reeling backwards and Harry caught her. Everyone's wand was out but Hermione scolded them and then went on her way back to the Gryffindor Tower.

Harry, Ginny and Ron followed close behind her as she stormed through the deserted corridors. Harry was the first to comment on their encounter, "What does he think he'll gain by doing that?"

"He's Malfoy, what more of an excuse does he need," Ron commented.

"You know I've seen him hanging our around the Room of Requirement a lot lately. He's up to something."

"Harry there must be more than one reason that he's been their. It's probably completely coincidental."

"Hermione you can't honestly believe that he's not up to something. Innocent people don't go to the same place every night. Besides he's Malfoy, that's reason enough to suspect him."

"Harry," she sighed, "If you saw him all those times you must have been there as well. He's most likely saying the same thing about you right now. I've told you this exact same thing before. Get over it. You thought he was the Heir to Slytherin and he wasn't now you think this, what's next?"

"Hermione-"

"Enough, nothings happening this year. We're going to have a completely uneventful final few weeks. Understood?"

Harry stopped in his tracks and pulled them into a huddle as he quietly whispered, "No we're not."

"Okay mate what's going on?" Ron asked.

"Just stuff that Dumbledore's been telling me. Bad stuff is happening and going to happen and we won't be immune from it. Well you might be but I won't be. I never am."

"What? Harry what's happening? Why didn't you tell me this before?" Ginny asked, terror rippling through her voice.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have told you that," he said as he turned and scurried off towards the Fat Lady.

Ginny looked over at Hermione briefly before hastily running after her raven haired boyfriend.

"Well I guess it's just you and me," Ron said.

"Yeah, I guess."

With Harry and Ginny gone their evening didn't get much more exciting and so after sitting around in the noisy common room catching up for a little while Ron stood up and said that it was time for him to turn in.

"Goodnight," Hermione said and then she jumped up and gave her friend and crushing hug.

"Wow, what's that for? You've never done that before?"

That was entirely right. Before she wouldn't dare go anywhere near him like that because her emotions were to strong. Now she was over him and saw him only as what he was, an amazing friend, "Thanks, I needed that."

"Okay then, well night," he said awkwardly before he retreated up the boy's staircase.

Once the coast was clear Hermione ducked out of the portrait hole and hurried through the castle. After walking three time in front of the hidden door a door knob appeared and she reached out and spun it. Into the cozy room she walked and she heard the door softly seal behind her.

"Can you not do anything about Potter? He's been following me around a lot lately. He's also sitting right outside the door."

"Well does he have reason to follow you?" she wanted to get it out before anything else could get in the way. Maybe Harry was right for once.

"What? Why would he...?"

Hermione shrugged animatedly.

"Besides your cover is completely blown. Did you not just hear what I said."

"I'm not deaf," she tried to reason.

"Really because I told you Potters sitting out there watching this corridor. You are now officially on his 'up to something' list. Better watch out."

"No, I'm not."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm smarter than you. I have my ways of getting around him. Did you not think I wouldn't see him and Ginny disappear up into his dorm and then minutes later the portrait hole open for no reason. Sure they're good, but I'm going to brag here, I'm better."

"Okay then, moving on," he muttered as he took a step towards her. He was dying to hold her close. He wouldn't lie, their relationship had become quite physical and they were talking less and less at their nightly meetings. Probably because talking turned to yelling and it was easier to by pass all that by letting their passion out other ways.

"No why did you tell everyone that I was sleeping with you?" she demanded, anger seeping into her voice and she knew she had to start calming down or she would later regret it. They could only take so much strain in one day.

"Well it got the right reaction. What else could I have said that would have provoked you enough to slap me? Face it you're amazing at controlling your emotions and I mean that in the nicest possible way except sometimes I say things that push you overboard. That I figured and now it's my turn to brag correctly. If I'm correct you didn't want to reveal what we are doing again and I think that left little doubt. You don't usually slap somebody let alone your boyfriend like that."

"I guess you're right, but what if they had have taken it the wrong way? What if it didn't work out?"

was

"It didn't so be happy," he took another step closer to her. Closing the gap drastically.

Hermione's breath quickened and her eagerness growing as she closed the cab between them in one swift movement. She began by placing tender kisses on his lips, across his jaw line, down his neck. With each kiss her hands twisted farther into his hair. Ahh so silky smooth. She paused for a second, just long enough for him to gain the upper hand. He reached out and grabbed her hands and enclosed them in his as his lips pressed gently against hers. He flicked his tongue over her lips and she willingly granted him entry.

It was at this time that Draco glanced up and saw a new addition to the room. Hermione had not yet seen it so he ignored it and went back to pleasing his girlfriend.

As their kisses grew more hurried Draco's hands began to wander. They started at her waist and worked their way upwards. Finally settling gently underneath her breasts. She didn't flinch, she was used to it by now. The first time his hands had begun to wander she had jumped back in surprise and scolded him with her eyes. His fingers began to massage each breast until even through her bra he could feel her nipples become erect. Her hands that were once draped loosely around his neck now tightened as a moaned seeped out from between her rosy lips.

"Draco."

It was again not the first time he'd heard his names dripping with such passion come out of her mouth.

She took the lead by unbuttoning her white school issue blouse. He was surprised by what she was wearing underneath. A lazy black bra which lifted and accented in all the right places. His erection began to grow as he stood and admired her ample chest. One that not so long ago she had tried to mask with ugly, baggy clothes. What lay under the bra was new to him. Although he had stripped her top she had never allowed him to go much farther.

He closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh. It was taking all of his will power to stand their and stare at her when all he wanted to do was feel his skin against hers.

Reading his thoughts by the expression on his face she stepped up to him and reached behind her back and unclasped her bra. It fell away to the floor and she closed the rest of the gap, "I think I'm ready. I know you are so don't tell me otherwise," she whispered as she began to unbutton his buttons. His cloak had already been discarded. He'd been undressed by girls numerous times but nothing quite compared to Hermione. She did it painfully slow but amazingly. Her breasts bobbed as she stretched out her arms and he had to admit the view was pretty damn good. You sure know how to pick 'em he congratulated himself. Once his shirt was safely kicked to the side he scooped Hermione up and carried her across the room and to the new addition.

"What?" she asked.

"Shhh," he said as he laid her down on the puffy bed. Startled at the sudden softness but satisfied she looked up and admired her boyfriends toned chest.

"Are you coming or what?" she demanded.

He didn't need to be asked twice.

Her lips connected with his and they lay their entwined, naked from the waist up. Eagerly but with restrain his hands at what he felt to be the right time began to inch towards her skirt. WIth his hands on the zipper Hermione tensed causing Draco to draw back. Seeing the look that he sent her she quickly stuttered, "No I'm ready."

"Hermione I don't want to do this unless you're more than sure."

"I am, please."

He hated it but his hormones had taken over long before and so he didn't need much more convincing. Her skirt came off followed quickly by her panties and then she was lying before him completely naked. He reached for his belt and hastily unclasped it. His pants were off seconds later until he was lying only in his boxers.

"Draco," Hermione whispered.

'What?"

She didn't say anything for a minute and then whispered something so quietly he didn't hear what she had said, "Sorry you'll have to speak a little louder."

"Draco I don't know what I'm doing."

He closed his eyes. She wasn't the first girl who's virginity he'd taken but she was the first to admit her inexperience. All the other girls had faked experience and then sorrily disappointed him, "Everyone's new once," he didn't know what else to say to her. He would never admit that his first time he'd been scared out of his mind. She was coping much better than he had. Maybe it had something to do with being a girl versus a guy.

Ending her hesitation he began to kiss her once again and fondle her breasts, things he knew she was comfortable with. When he felt the time was right-and he couldn't take it much longer-his hands trailed lower down to her inner thighs where he traced his fingers softly up the soft flesh of her thigh. Her hips moved up towards him and he took that as his que. His boxers were off and they were both lying their with nothing left between them.

"Are you sure?" he asked one last time, but he bit his tongue as he did so. He didn't know what he'd do if she backed out now. He'd have to leave right away.

A quick nod was all it took as he positioned himself at her entrance and thrust into her as gently as he good. Even despite his efforts she still cringed but she quickly masked it. He was very gentle at first but soon began to speed up. She was a bit awkward at times, not knowing what to do with her limbs but she quickly got the rhythm. Her body knew what it was supposed to and so her hips rocked back and forth in time with his. His biggest fear was the she wouldn't climax, he'd feel horrible if she didn't but it was her first time. His fears were shot down though when her muscles tightened around him and she cried out. The feeling of her taunt muscles around his aroused member send him over the edge and he climaxed, spraying himself into her.

Sweaty and exhausted he pulled himself out of her and she curled up next to him. He really had never been much of a cuddly person after sex but with her he was different. He allowed her to mold herself into him and they clung to each other.

"That was rather awkward," she admitted sadly.

It was but he would never tell her that. This was as much a milestone for him as it was for her. While it was her first time, it was his first time that it actually meant something. He wrapped his arms around he skin and said, "No, you were great."

She smiled and fell back into silence. Neither of them wanted to leave but their prefect's curfew was rapidly approaching and so they untangled themselves and slowly dressed. Hermione felt self conscience as she searched the room for her cloths. She knew that she had not been that good, Draco said she was but it was blatantly obvious that he had been lying.

"Well night," she said as she stood posed at the doorway.

"Yeah, night."

The click of the door was all that told him she was gone.

There was only three minutes until curfew so Hermione flew through the corridors. Making it to the portrait of the Fat Lady with only seconds to spare.

"Just made it," she said.

"Yeah," Hermione told her the password and the hold opened, "night."

Through the deserted Common Room Hermione trekked slower this time and up the stairs. In the darkness of her dorm she let her grin emerge. It was washed away soon after when she pulled back the hangings of her four poster to see...

xxx.:.x.

a/n finally, at last!! A cliff hanger. I don't think I've had one yet in this story but now seemed like the perfect time. You guys are great with your reviews and all I ask is that you keep it up. They are great to see. Again another apology. I was away for a week and then all last week involved a lot of catch up stuff so I am now back to normal and hoping to be writing more often and so I'll end with please please please review and tell me what you thought. I really want to know you opinion and even if it is bad. I can deal with it-i think-yeah it helps me write better. thank you.


	15. Realizations

Through the deserted Common Room Hermione trekked slower this time and up the stairs. In the darkness of her dorm she let her grin emerge. It was washed away soon after when she pulled back the hangings of her four poster to see the wide awake and angry form of her best friend.

"Hermione," Ginny sighed, "where have you been?" but the question was irrelevant, she already knew the answer.

It wasn't something Hermione wanted to discuss, not now, not ever. By not saying anything she had lied. Now that she was caught in the center of that lie should she deny it further and keep up the angry cycle or admit it. She hated the idea of what she was about to do but again she wasn't ready. It was a cowardly act and one she regret simply thinking about but the thought of letting spill her now darkest secrets were scary.

"I went for a walk," Hermione replied to the red head's question, "I've been studying so much and I just needed to clear my brain."

Ginny looked on skeptically but didn't comment on the blatant lie that was just laid before her. Instead she made a softer comment, "It was what Malfoy said wasn't it? God he's such an idiot. Hermione I am so sorry for telling you to go for it. I feel horrible. He's a jerk."

On Hermione's end it was hard to hear such cruel words being said behind her boyfriends back and be unable to do anything about them without blowing her paper thin cover.

"I can't believe he'd stoop as low as to rub your virginity in your face."

Ginny was trying to hide her angry but was failing. Instead of hiding it she was masking the anger that should be directed towards Hermione into a full blown attack on Malfoy.

"You know you'd think with his upbringing and all he'd have a little bit of decency. I guess not. I've been treated like scum by guy's Hermione. They say they'll do one thing and then what do you know they do the opposite. He hasn't treated you like scum Hermione. He's treated you like you aren't even human. You don't deserve that."

"Get out," Hermione whispered and when Ginny didn't comply she said it again but more forcefully, "Get out."

Shock registered on Ginny's face as she listened but didn't respond to Hermione's blunt requests.

"Ginny I'm not asking now I'm telling you, now I don't want to see you in here again."

Ginny was ultimately testing how far she could push but Hermione had had enough, "Fine stay I'm leaving," she spun on her heels and raced out of the dorm and down the staircase with Ginny hot on her heels, "get away from she," she exclaimed as she raced towards the portrait hole.

"Hermione, you can't go out there, it's after curfew. You'll get caught."

"I've been going out every night since January and I haven't been caught once now get out of my way."

Ginny had found her way between the portrait hole and Hermione and was currently blocking her exit. Hurt and betrayal were the only things that Ginny was feeling. Never before had she felt like the inexperienced one; the person who shied away from adventure. Now she felt like she had been left in the dust by her ever innocent friend. It hurt deeply like a knife penetrating the deepest part of her soul. Admitting defeat she sidestepped out of the way. They would make up, they always did and this time would be no different. The best thing to do at the moment was simply give Hermione her space, "Go, do what you have to. I won't stop you anymore."

er

Shocked but also sadden at the sudden turn in events Hermione took the golden opportunity and escaped through the portrait hole.

"Hey you, you know it's after curfew," the Fat Lady reminded as Hermione slipped out into the forbidden corridors. Only when the portrait saw who it was did she stop her preaching. Over the years the lady in the portrait had become quite attached to Hermione. Maybe for the only reason that Hermione was polite to her. She apologized if she woke her, thanked her kindly when she opened and sometimes even held a brief but pleasant conversation. Only those few simple things had guaranteed Hermione a place where she could do almost anything without fear of reprimand from the portrait.

"Thanks for the reminder," Hermione said.

"No problem dear," the lady smiled matronly.

"I'm sorry I can't talk tonight," she hung her head.

"On the contrary hon tonight looks like the night that you need to talk the most."

"Yeah," Hermione whispered quietly as silent tears were shed from her over pooled eyes, "I guess you're right but I really do need to go."

"Be careful out there."

"Thanks," she uttered as she walked into the darkness of the corridors. She knew exactly where she was heading and her feet traced the steps automatically. She wanted to be alone. Never had she wanted the peace and solitude of an empty room and a good book as much as she did now.

Three times she walked back and forth before the door appeared. In she stepped to a room she'd spent all over her spare time in lately but it didn't look the same. Gone was the usual couch, chair and fire and even the newly added bed. In its place was the forest floor of an untamed jungle. The scent of dank earth met her nostrils as she padded soundlessly across the floor pretending to be soil. She made her way over to a rather thick tree trunk and sat down with it as her backrest. Tilting her head back she was just able to make out a few imaginary stars that managed to poke their way through the thick canopy. In the distance birds made their strange but exhilarating calls as they searched for their lost babies or to find a mate. The rustle of the wind could be heart and it was so enticing that Hermione slipped out of the world of school and boys and into one where nothing else mattered. She was no longer trapped in her spinning lifestyle. One spinning so faced it scared her but the fear of stopping or even slowing down was more fearful as it was unknown what may happen to her with a sudden change of speed. Would she loose her footing, fly off into the abyss? The soft trickle of water drifted over from a nearby brook and that soothed Hermione into a slumber.

Hermione kept her eyes closed as she concentrated solely on her breath. A deep breath in though her nose and then a steady exhale through her mouth. It was calming. Something she'd been told to do but had never done. Exams were approaching but already they were the farthest thing from her mind. Her fight with Ginny was still there though and no amount of steady calming breaths could take the realization of the words that they had exchanged away. It seemed that if she wasn't at odds with Draco than something had gone wrong between her and Ginny. When would this nightmare ever end?

As much as she figured her little jungle would be a wonderful face to sleep her conscience was already starting to bother her. Now calmed and clear headed she knew that the only thing she could do that would ensure her a full night's sleep was to go and talk things through with Ginny and ultimately apologize.

H

Sad to leave her little oasis but knowing she had to she stood up and brushed the remaining flecks of dirt of the seat of her pants.

On her way back up to the Common Room she tried to rehearse what she was going to say but whatever way she put it it sounded crazy. Figuring that she'd just have to wing it she walked into the empty common room and up the Girl's Staircase without a second thought. She pushed opened the fifth year girl's dorm door figuring that would be her best bet for finding Ginny. Sure enough when she performed the same action that she had done before only one dorm over she wasn't shocked to find the sleeping body of Ginny or what she thought to be sleeping. On closer inspection she noted that Ginny was not sleeping. Her back was facing Hermione and Hermione shook her to notify her that somebody was there. There was no way she had missed the not so subtle whoosh of the bed curtains being pulled back or the rough shake that Hermione had done. Leaving Hermione to the conclusion that Ginny was purposely ignoring her and she honestly couldn't blame her.

Deciding that her current methods were useless she sat down on the edge of the bed and proceeded to lye down. Pulling the curtains closed behind her and then placing a silencing charm around them as to not be overheard.

Hermione began talking to an unresponsive ear but gradually as she went further she gained little bits of Ginny's attention.

"You're my best friend Ginny. Really my only friend that I feel I can talk to. I don't have that many people that I'm close to. I'm not all that well liked here and I know it. Unlike you who has the friendship of all the girls and the attention of all the guys. That's not the point though. What I'm trying to say is that that's why it hurts so much to know that I've cause our fight. I don't want to loose you. Now here's the really hard part," a steadying breath was all she gave herself time for.

Ginny still hadn't turned in Hermione's direction but it was evident that she was listening intently.

"You were right about not telling me about loosing your virginity for the reason you did. I did exactly what you thought I would do. I'm ashamed to admit it and Draco won't even discuss it with me. It hurt him as much as it did me. The next time I saw him after hearing your news I vowed that I wouldn't be left in the dust. You'd done it to me before with your first kiss and I hated the feeling. When I walked into the room to meet Draco that night I threw myself at him. To any observer it most likely looked like I was very drunk. I wasn't myself and I was not thinking straight. No I'll correct that I wasn't thinking at all."

Hermione didn't notice it as she kept on talking but Ginny had moved her head slightly in the direction to better her listening of what was being said.

"He turned me down. He said I wasn't ready and I got mad at him, really mad. I told him that I was and he couldn't tell me what to do. I was a complete asshole."

In the darkness a smile appeared on Ginny's face.

"He pushed me away and I was mad at him. It's been a tense point between us ever since. I lied to you. I never told you we got back together but we did. It was something I did that I wasn't proud of. I had vowed that I was done with him and then I went back to him like a crazy fool that we so often laugh at for how easy she is manipulated. He played me like I was a puppet and I fell for it."

She had Ginny's complete attention now and if she had bothered to look over to her friend she would notice that she had rolled over.

"And now the part that I'm most ashamed but also thrilled about."

"Hermione you don't have to tell me," Ginny whispered. Her whisper was like a roar in the quietness of the dormitory.

"Yeah I do. I've been lying to long. Do you know that when I saw you in my bed earlier I stood there and debated with myself over lying to you or coming clean. I was such a coward that I decided that it was easier to keep spinning myself a sticky web."

By now Ginny understood that she was getting the full story, the full blown confession.

"Together we've been tense for a while but I decided that that needed to end. I walked into to see Draco tonight with no plans of leaving without what I'd come for. He agreed. Really it didn't take all that much convincing," she shook her head and at the same time felt Ginny's soft hand being placed on her shoulder comfortingly. They were on mutual ground now. A place where neither could be mad at the other, "the thing is. I was mad when I saw you in my dorm. I don't know why but I was so angry with you. I feel so horrible, you're my best friend and I should share with you straight away the events of my big night but I didn't because of a pointless grudge I was holding against you for something you did to protect me."

Ginny cut Hermione off at this point because she was seeing how worked up Hermione was getting, "I forgive you. It was a mistake. You were stressed out and let's be honest your hormones were a bit crazy at the time."

Hermione stared into the eyes of her friend and laughed, "This is ridiculous."

The laughter was contagious because pretty quickly Ginny was giggling alongside of Hermione. After they'd finished their bout of the giggles they fell back into silence.

"How about we say that from now on we're open with each other?" Ginny suggested. She was getting sick and tired of the whole keeping secrets to protect the other when in full honesty she knew it was doing more harm than good.

"Sounds like a plan I can live with."

"With that solved then I believe you have something you'd like to share," Ginny raised one eyebrow and then comically wiggled them. A skill that must have taken countless hours in front of a mirror to master.

Hermione blushed. Both girls had forgiven but neither had forgotten and probably never would.

"Go on," it's not like I haven't seen or done it before," Ginny giggled.

"Well when you put it like that," Hermione said but was still trying to find a way to skate around telling the whole event. She'd promised to share stuff but some things had to be kept private.

"If you could describe it in one word what would it be?" Ginny threw the question out but while she was waiting for an answer began to recall her own first time. Her one word would be 'finally,' she and Harry had never done more than kiss and while she could tell that he enjoyed being around her, she had a hard time drawing him into being intimate with her. It had frustrated her but also pleased her because other guy's she'd dated and she wouldn't hesitate to admit it had dated her for her body. Shallow buggers.

"Awkward," Hermione said softly.

Ginny's heart sank, poor girl.

"I didn't have a clue what I was doing and I think Draco was getting frustrated with me but he tried to hide it. Nothing seemed to work out and yeah," her shoulders were slumped and her head hung low. The posture of defeat.

Ginny who was still lying beside Hermione reached over and enveloped Hermione in a hug, "Mine wasn't all that spectacular either," she said soothingly, "Sure I made it out to be but it was bloody awkward as well. Harry had never done it before and neither had I so you can only imagine. I'd always wondered if it would be better to have my first time with someone with experience just because they knew what they were doing. Don't get me wrong I wouldn't give up what Harry and I did for anything but still I wonder," Ginny glanced at her friend and to her astonishment saw that she no longer was listening to her. At some point she must have drifted off to sleep. Good for her, she needed it.

xxx.:.x.

It was the first time Draco hadn't broadcasted his achievements to his companions. This time he didn't feel right revealing his and Hermione's most personal moments together.

As he flopped down on his bed with so much force the bed shook he played over the events of the previous hour. At times he still couldn't believe it. He'd set out at the start of the year to get into Granger's pants. In actuality what had happened was the last thing he had expected. It had been a game. One that he had failed at horrible if he was following his own rules. In terms of happiness though he had won a million times over. Who would have thought that his plan to bed a girl would turn out so drastically different and on top of all that it wasn't just any girl, it was Granger! Granger, the bookworm, know-it-all, innocent, perfect, goody-two-shoed Granger!

What was this world coming to? Had he hit his head hard? Hard enough to send him spiraling off into an alternate universe where the good girls went for the bad boys. One where...Oh no! His heart sunk, "Not now," he muttered out loud, "please no."

Jumping off the bed he raced over to look at the calender that was tacked up beside the doorway. The calender had a picture of a sunny field filled with wild flowers. Flowers he instantly thought that Hermione would love. HIs next thought was what would anybody think if they came into a guy's dorm and saw pictures of flowers on the walls and the Slytherin's dorms at that? Whatever, that was not the point now. What mattered was the date that was steadily bearing down on him. Suffocating him as tried hopelessly to push it away. No running would clear him of what loomed ahead. Nothing could help him now. His only regret was what it would do to Hermione. There was no way he could explain. It had to be done without anybody knowing. He liked her a lot, maybe even loved her. The thought of loving a girl used to make him cringe but when he thought about it in the context of Hermione a warm feeling enveloped him. Yeah he could grow to love her. That wasn't the point now. The point was that he had probably done the cruelest thing ever without either of them realizing it. Their hardest day's together would seem like a day spent sprawled in the sun by the lake compared to what was to come.

xxx.:.x.

a/n I don't have much to say today except please review. I haven't been getting much support lately and that makes me :( so please review and thank you to those wonderful people that keep reviewing.


	16. Choices

a/n so what's going to happen here is a bit of stuff that's actually from the sixth book and then bits of my own stuff. the events should be similar to the HBP at least that's what I'm aiming for. Enjoy.

xxx.:.x.

Hermione and Ron were lounging on the couch in the Gryffindor Common Room when the portrait hole flew open and in came an out of breath Harry who not long before had been summoned to the Headmaster's Office.

"What was that all about Harry?" Hermione asked concerned.

"Was it," Ron began but then lowered his voice after Hermione shot him a look, "a lesson?"

"No," Harry walked over to the two so he was standing close enough to whisper. Over the past few nights Harry had filled Hermione in on the contents of his lessons with Dumbledore.

"What was it?" Ron asked.

"Dumbledore thinks he's found another Horcrux and he's dead set that tonight we're going to find and destroy it."

"Harry that's dangerous," Hermione moaned.

"You don't think I know that? Besides my life hasn't been a walk in the park so far. What's one more brush with death? I'll be right back," Harry pushed passed his two startled friends and took the stairs up to his dorm two at a time. Ten seconds later he had returned.

"Okay here's where you have to listen. I don't care what you guy's say but Malfoy was celebrating in the Room of Requirement. He's been working on something and he's finally got it right. Something's going to happen tonight and if Dumbledore's gone..." he didn't finish the thought, nor did he need to.

For Hermione it was an abrupt jolt in the opposite direction. One minute she thought she'd struggle through her share of problems and was finally on the brighter side and now here she was again, "Harry you're still on about Malfoy?"

"Bloody hell Hermione," Harry swore, "Stop defending him for once. Yes he's up to something. Now I want you to keep track of him," he handed her the Marauder's Map, "and take these," in his other hand he thrust a handful of shiny coins into Ron's outstretched palms, "Get the DA on board."

Hermione's head was spinning. What was happening? What was going to happen? Who did she believe? Everything was changing so quickly.

"Watch Snape as well," Harry added, "Don't let them out of your sight."

"Harry," Hermione cried as her eyes welled up. Fear for him, fear for the unknown and fear for Draco were all mixing together inside of her and she didn't know which way to turn.

"Here," Harry shoved a sock into Ron's other hand.

"Gee thanks."

"It's the Felix Felicis you idiot. Now share it between you guys and Ginny."

Ah, the luck potion Harry had won earlier in the term.

"And please," Harry's voice calmed down a notch, "Tell her goodbye."

"Damn it Harry," Ron bellowed, "Don't start saying your goodbyes."

"I've got to go," with one last fleeting glance he looked at them and then raced out the door. Before he had fully disappeared he shouted, "Remember what I said."

Staring at the now closed portrait hole Hermione and Ron were left with an old piece of parchment, some coin, a sock and many questions.

"Well I guess we better go do some scouting out," Ron muttered.

"And find Ginny," Hermione added, "You go do that, I have something I have to do first."

Ron looked at her questionably but didn't ask any further questions, "Okay I'll find her and then we'll meet up."

Hermione took off at a half run to the exit of the Common Room but stopped short when a voice from behind her called out to her, "Be careful."

"You to," she gave a half hearted smile and then was off to try and discover the truth.

xxx.:.x.

It was not nearly time yet but already his throat had become constricted as the lump steadily rose. It was nerves he kept trying to tell himself when he knew full well what it actually was. Fear, regret, hate, disappointment and resignation. All of those emotions, strong when felt by themselves but when mixed together they became so overpowering it was hard at times for him to keep himself upright. He'd questioned what he was about to do ever since he'd heard about his task. Never so much as when the date began to rapidly grow nearer. It seemed that the more the day's left began to dwindle the faster the clock ticked.

He skirted in between trees and ducked under low hanging branches. He wasn't supposed to be in here but what was one school rule broken considering what he was about to do? The forest had always scared him. He would be the last one to forget how much of a wimp he had been in his first year when brought into the darkness for a detention. So much had changed. He had been anything but innocent at the time. As the years progressed he had become more arrogant and manipulative but that had suddenly halted when he had become involved with Hermione. He now liked to think that while he was a lot worse of a person than he had been all those years ago as he had boarded the train for his first year at Hogwarts he also had become a bit better. He reflected on that as passed what was sure to be his last afternoon at Hogwart's by walking through his once most feared place. Today the forest held a comfort to him. The fear that he had once felt when setting foot inside of it was still there but his other turmoils had pushed it to the far corners of his brain.

His last day. It was hard for him to believe. He didn't want to leave but he knew that with what was to come there would be nothing left to return to in September even if he was guilt free. No tonight was the turning point.

Hermione! She was what was making this much harder than it should be. Who would have thought that he'd be reconsidering what he had thought to be in stone all because of her. She was why he was pacing in the secluded woods instead of spending the last few loving minutes together. He feared that if he saw her for even a second he would cave and he couldn't let that happen. Not now when his family needed him most. His Dad had failed them and he wasn't going to repeat his terrible mistake. It was best to stay where he knew Hermione would never find him. His heart ached as he thought about how he would never see her again. He might see her up at the castle for a fleeting moment one last time but by that time it would be to late. She would see him for what he truly was.

All of this extra time was not doing him any good. There was to much time to give into his conscience.

The last time he and Hermione had spent a lot of meaningful time together was the night that they had first made love. After that they'd not been able to find any spare time. Sure they'd snuck kisses in empty broom closets but not once had they met for their nightly meeting. It would be a sour point for Draco for what he predicted to be a very long time, never getting to properly say goodbye. Not that it would make what he was about to do any better.

xxx.:.x.

Hermione raced through the corridors looking for the telltale blonde hair but did not see it. Once she thought she saw it bobbing as it rounded the corner only steps ahead of her but when she caught up she was disappointed to notice that it was only a fourth year Hufflepuff. Remember that she had the map with her she mentally kicked herself as she snuck into an empty classroom and pointed her wand at the map, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," black lines began snaking across the crinkled parchment and solid black dots steadily started appearing. She laid the map down on one of the desks and flattened it out with her hands. Starting at the bottom she worked her way up. Floor by floor. On the third floor she was relieved to see to dots labeled Ron and Ginny standing right beside each other.

After a thorough search of the entire castle and grounds she was disappointed to have not found Draco. Puzzled by his whereabouts she decided to do a final quick scan of the map. Two attempts down she figured that he was indeed not on the map. Where could he be then? She had seen him properly in days. They'd only spent fleeting moments together, nothing satisfactory. Their last intimate encounter had been the night that he had taken her virginity.

She squeezed her eyes closed and then when she opened them she had hoped to have come up with some miraculous solution. Nothing, her mind was completely blank. Fear had ebbed it's way inside of her as she got the uneasy feeling that something wasn't right. This day wouldn't turn out well.

Figuring that if she couldn't find Draco she would have to accept that and move on. She could and would come back to it later. Right now she had to find Ginny and Ron. If Draco couldn't be found by the map there was little hope that one person would be able to find him by herself no matter how strong her will was.

Up to the third floor she raced and she was relieved to find Ron and Ginny.

"Hermione," Ginny exclaimed cheerfully but the worry was evident on her face. From behind her Ron nodded his head indicating that he had told Ginny that her boyfriend had run off to some unknown but dangerous place with little to no explanation.

"We're heading up to the Room of Requirement," Ginny murmured so no passers buy could over hear, "We'll then signal everyone and hope they have their coins with them."

The Room of Requirement. That was it. Then almost as quickly as it had soared her heart sunk. No, it was in the castle, it would have shown up on the map, but then again. She knew that they'd come up with the answer to whether to room would appear or not but for the life of her she couldn't remember, "Hey guys," Hermione said, "I've just remembered something; I'll catch up with you there."

"Okay," Ginny shrugged.

"Come on Gin," Ron said.

Hermione ran off ahead of them. Flying up the next staircase she made her way to one of the secret passages. If Ron and Ginny took the short cut there was no way she'd make it there, in and out on time but if they took the normal route of corridors and staircases she might just have a chance. It would be close.

Three times she walked back and forth. She paused a split second before turning the handle and then flung open the solid door. Her heart that had been rising in anticipation dropped like her stomach always did on a lift. The room was empty. The grate in the fire was empty except for a sad looking pile of ash. The rest of the room was undisturbed as well. That was it. Her last hope was gone. Understanding that she didn't have much time she reluctantly stepped back out of the room. Closing the door was like sealing the tomb. It was over. Nothing good was going to come of this. The tears threatened to overflow but as much as she would have welcomed them she pushed them back. Now was not time to be feeling sorry for herself. She had known what she was getting into by trusting him.

Twenty minutes later the newly changed room was restored once again to its former DA Headquarters. Everything was the same, including the crowd of eager but also anxious looking students. The only thing absent was Harry.

"Okay you're probably all wondering why we called you all here today?" Ron shouted over the rumble of the crowd.

"Yeah," a few voices yelled from the crowd.

"Where's Harry?" another cried out.

"That's what I'm getting to. Harry is currently with Dumbledore right now. He's come into some unsettling info that there might be some incidents regarding some of You Know Who's followers."

Noise erupted throughout the room and Ginny had to pull out her wand and shoot of a loud bang to gather everyone's attention once again. Meanwhile Hermione had shrunk back into the corner. This was usually her job of talking to everyone and controlling the crowds but she wasn't into it. Her mind was someplace else.

"So we aren't saying that it's a guarantee that any of this is happening but we also aren't saying that it for sure won't. We're asking for your help but keep in mind that if there is a fight it is quite possible that some of you may get injured. With that said you can leave now if you don't want to be involved."

Nobody left.

Hermione's head was swimming, dark magic, death eaters, danger, injury. What had she gotten herself into? She knew that that's what a Malfoy did.

Ron continued to explain what their plan was but then he finished with, "We have reason to believe that this is not an outside attack."

"What do you mean?" someone yelled.

"From what we've heard and witnessed we believe it to be an inside job. Done by a handful of students led by Malfoy and overseen by Snape."

That followed by a few collected gasps but the majority of people were not all that surprised. They knew or thought they knew what the two Slytherin's were like.

"The teachers don't believe us, nor does Dumbledore," Ron said. It wasn't completely true, he hadn't personally talked to anyone but he figured Harry had and if they believed him there would be no way Dumbledore would be leaving the school unattended, "It's up to us then. Nobody else believes us."

Do I? Hermione asked herself. Whose side was she on? It pained her to even think that question but she did. As much as everyone was telling her that it was Malfoy, bad, horrible Malfoy she still held a little dash of hope. Maybe it was her being naive or maybe it was relying on her gut. Whatever it was it was tearing her apart as she listened to Ron and Ginny rile up the troops. Would she be able to fight against him if the time came? The answer came quickly and it was the first thing in awhile that she truly believed. No!

She hoped it didn't come time for her to choose.

xxx.:.x.

a/n well as I was writing this I planned to have everything crammed into one chapter. Now I've barely made a dint into what I wanted to write and this seemed like a good ending point so you will have to wait to see what she chooses. If you are wondering that's why this chapter is a bit shorter. And because it's getting late and I'm tired but also wanting to post. You're reviews have been wonderful over the last couple of days and I look forward to hearing from you again. Thanks.


	17. Decisions

a/n this is an interesting chapter. It pretty much followed the last part of HBP but with my own additions. The brilliant sentences are sadly not mine, they belong to the amazing JK. the semi brilliant ones are mine. Some of the dialogue I've kept the same but some I've switched up to better fit it into how I wanted this to work out. Enjoy.

xxx.:.x.

Dusk had overtaken the grounds and a chill was lingering as the members of the DA sat through a late supper on the edge of their seats. They were prepared for the doors to be flung open and Death Eaters rushing in throwing curses every which way. Nobody ate much; they mostly picked at their food and pushed it around their plates. Hermione was the only one who wasn't. Her head was so far removed from the seemingly ordinary evening that she hadn't even bothered to pick up her fork. Her full plate was staring up into her unreceptive eyes as her brain tried to take in everything that was about to happen. By now she knew that it wasn't a matter of if she had to choose, but what her decision would be.

Ginny and Ron were sitting on either side of Hermione and every thirty-seconds or so either of them would do a quick scan of the Great Hall. At one point their eyes fell collectively on the empty seats at the Head Table. Dumbledore's central seat was vacant. To his one side the seat which was always occupied by Snape was left empty as well. The strangest part of it all-but one they had seen coming-was that the rest of the Professors in attendance didn't look at all worried. To them it was just one more evening spent confined in a castle with hundreds of young wizards and witches.

All of a sudden Hermione pushed back her seat and stood up, knocking her full goblet of pumpkin juice over in the process. Everyone around her scrambled for napkins to mop it up but it didn't faze Hermione at all.

"Are you guy's not bloody wizards," Ginny shouted as she pulled out her wand and cleaned up the mess with one effortless flick. The students that had gathered a pile of napkins looked stunned but also embarrassed for not realizing the obvious.

"Hermione," Ron said gently.

"I've got to go," she whispered and then bolted towards the door.

Ron and Ginny exchanged quick glances before they too were running towards the exit. They had decided before that nobody would be allowed to wander off by themselves. It was to dangerous.

They caught up to Hermione at the top of the first set of stairs.

"What was that all about?" Ron demanded.

Hermione was not about to explain anything and nor was Ginny. All Ginny could do was silently plead to Hermione that she would divulge what she had done once again.

"I need to do some stuff," Hermione whispered, "I'll be okay, just let me go."

"We have to..." Ron stammered but was cut off by Ginny.

"Go, if we need you we'll find you," then Ginny walked up and gave Hermione a tight hug and whispered in her ear so only they could hear, "I can't make the choice for you and nor am I going to try. Do what you feel you can live with," when she stepped back she gave a weak smile and then grabbed Ron's arm and pulled him back down the stairs.

Hermione sighed and then when everything was clear she pulled out the Marauder's Map from her pocket. It didn't take her long for her fears to be confirmed once again. Nowhere on the map could she see a dot that read 'Malfoy.' All of a sudden it hit her, there was one place that he could be but not be on the map and still be close by. If he really was in the middle of all this he wouldn't want to be far away. Turning quickly she raced back down the stairs she had recently walked up. Across the Entrance Hall and threw the front doors. The damp night air met her as she sprinted across the grounds in the direction of the forest. By now it was completely dark out and as she ran she stumbled over the looser parts of the path. At the edge of the forest she stopped suddenly. If she went into the trees she could walk within an arms reach of him and still not see him. Besides she wasn't even positive that he was in the forest. Settling down with her back against a large tree she prepared herself to wait. From this vantage point she could see the front doors of the castle, the school gates and most of the edge of the forest.

Nothing happened. No cloaked figure appeared, no strange light, nothing. She wanted to give up, to go back inside to the warmth the castle offered but something held her back. Something told her to wait it out, just a little bit longer. She didn't know what time it was and nor did she really want to know. Knowing meant that life was going on without her.

Struggling to keep her eyes open she adjusted her position. Getting to comfortable could be dangerous, she might miss something important. So far nothing irregular was happening. The castle was perched up high on the hill and looked as peaceful yet intimidating as ever. She wanted to pull out the Marauder's Map and see where all the member of the DA had situated themselves, but she knew that to do so she would need to use her wand light and that may attract some unwelcome attention. She would just have to wait it out. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst and expect nothing.

Her legs were curled up under her when she saw the shadow scamper out from the forest and across the grounds. Hermione jumped up because although it was only a faint outline she could see, she could tell at once who it was. Her feet tried to carry her in the direction of the figure but her right foot had fallen asleep, making the process and irritatingly slow and painful one. Her entire body froze as she witnessed the events unfold before her. She had just been about to call out to him when he pulled out his wand and shot a strange and unfamiliar light out from the end. A gasp escaped her lips when she what the spell was. Up in the sky, above the castle was the forbidding image of the Death Eater's skull and snake. The gasp was followed by a painful moan and her knees collapsed shortly after. She had expected it, she knew it was coming but to actually see it was another thing.

The wet ground soaked through her clothes but she didn't notice. To much was happening for her to worry about such petty things. The pain that was washing through her was overwhelming. It felt like she'd been trampled over by an angry herd of centaurs. It was a highly unpleasant feeling. Each breath came as a gasp until she lay hunched over into a ball trying to pull enough air into her lungs. By now the figure had made it's way up to the castle. She saw the light illuminate him from behind as he stepped across the threshold. Briefly he turned back outside and she could have sworn that his eyes lingered on the spot that she rested for a second longer than they did on other places during their sweep of the grounds. It wasn't possible though. There was no way he could see her sprawled across the grass in the dark, especially with the light behind him.

Closing her eyes she willed herself to stand but it didn't happen. Resolving that will wouldn't accomplish anything she forced her legs to support her body weight. They did but not so willingly. Her steps up to the castle were unsteady but she did make it. Once in the Entrance Hall she debated over her next move. Everything was screaming at her to follow him but she didn't know if she could stomach seeing him once again. It was such a tease to see him from a distance but also know what he was doing.

Her decision would have to wait because as she heard footsteps rushing back towards her and she had to duck quickly out of the way so she wasn't seen. It was Draco again. He walked back out the door and silently Hermione followed. Staying in the shadow as to not be seen she crouched down in the bushes besides the steps. Across the grounds at the foot of the Astronomy Tower Hermione could see one hunched over figure. Draco's pace quickened as he walked over to the lone figure. Hermione still in the shadows crept along behind.

"Expelliarmus," the spell shouted by Draco caused Dumbledore's wand to go pummeling through the air and over to Draco.

Dumbledore's old but still alert eyes fell upon Draco as soon as he appeared, "Good evening Draco."

Hermione had never seen Draco look like this. He looked like a scared puppy, preparing to at any second bolt in the opposite direction with his tail between his legs.

"Who else is here?" Draco asked. His voice was steady but that was the only part of him that was. His hands were trembling underneath his robes and it was almost impossible for him to grasp his wand. His mind had shut down through all of this. He knew his task and he wasn't going to screw up. He simply couldn't, not with how much was at stake.

"A question I might ask you. Or are you acting alone?"

"No," he replied almost to quickly, "I've got back-up. There are Death Eaters here, in your school tonight."

Hermione's blood began to boil but at the same time an icy chill ran through her. It had happened, he'd done it.

"Well, well," Dumbledore responded calmly to what should really have been alarming news, "Very good indeed. You found a way to let them in, did you?"

If it wasn't for fear of blowing her cover Hermione may have snorted out loud. Way to state the obvious. What scared Hermione most about this situation was not the fact of the inevitable battle that lay ahead. No it was the reason she was hiding. She didn't know what Draco's reaction would be to her. She believed but that could have been just hope that he wouldn't seriously harm her. Sure he'd do a few minor and completely reversible curses but that would be it. Or so she liked to think. A part of her, the tiny part that was forcing her to keep her cover was telling her unreceptive brain that she didn't know what he would do to her if she jumped out now, that she didn't really know the real him only the one he allowed her to see.

"Yeah," Malfoy replied drawing Hermione back to reality, "Right under your nose and you never realized!"

For a split second Hermione forgot that she was not supposed to be there and that she was most likely in love with the monster who was standing before her and she almost shouted out that he had not gotten away unnoticed, that indeed Harry had figured out that he was up to no good.

"Ingenious," Dumbledore said, "Yet...forgive me...where are they now? You seem unsupported."

There was no hint of the trademark Malfoy smirk at this time when Draco replied, "They et some of your guard. They're having a fight down below. They won't be long...I came on ahead. I-I've got a job to do."

Ginny! Ron! Were they okay? It hit Hermione like a pile of bricks falling from the tower above her. All the time she had been slinking around outside had her friends been fighting for her lives? What about Harry? Up until then she had completely forgotten about Harry. Had he snuck inside or was he still out with them? She was sure she wouldn't have missed him going inside that meant he was still out here somewhere. Or she hated to think it, something had already happened to him on his mission.

"Well, then, you must get on and do it, my dear boy," Dumbledore said softly, almost remorsefully. The silent seconds stretched between them until Dumbledore broke them by saying, "Draco, Draco, you are not a killer."

This time Hermione couldn't contain her anguish. A moan escaped her lips. Not a loud one, but loud enough to draw the attention of Draco. He spun around and Hermione cringed for two reasons. One in a stand off you never turn your back on your opponent and two she may have just blown her cover. It was to dark for Draco to make out anything and so he turned back to the task at hand.

"How do you know?" Malfoy asked but then quickly added defensively, "You don't know what I'm capable of. You don't know what I've done!"

You don't know what I've done either. Hermione thought. I almost sold out my friends to stand by your side tonight. I've lied to them. I've done so many things I said I would never do and all because of you. I gave you my heart, my trust and you snapped both of those and stamped on them until there was little left of them. Then you went and picked up ever little piece, promising to never do it again and the fool that I was I believed you.

"Oh, yes, I do. You almost killed Katie Bell and Ronald Weasley."

What? When? Why didn't she know about this? Her heart sunk yet again. He'd done it and then kept her busy to keep her away from it all in hopes that she would never find out. Knowing full well that her friends hadn't been talking with her much at all. It had all been a set up from the start. One so that he could get away with this stupid plan, whatever it was. If he kept her distracted, kept her from completing the circle with her friends and solving the puzzle he would have one less obstacle to face in the end. Well Harry had figured it out without her.

"You have been trying, will increasing desperation, to kill me all year. Forgive me, Draco but they have been feeble attempts...so feeble to be honest, that I wonder whether your heart has been really in it..."

No his heart was but his head wasn't. He was so preoccupied with his next manipulation of her that he had no time to consider anything else Hermione thought.

"It has been in it! I've been working on it all year and tonight-"

A scream broke the heated conversation and Draco froze. His ears were now trained on the noises from within the castle.

Stupid boy. Hermione thought once again. Dumbledore could have taken him out in a second if he so wished and all the small distractions would only make Draco's downfall quicker.

"So you have introduced Death Eaters into my school. Something I thought to have previously been impossible. How'd you do it?" Dumbledore asked politely as if they were two old friends discussing their life's accomplishments over cups of tea and a plate of biscuits, "Or if you don't want to discuss it maybe you should get a long with your job then. If you haven't realized there is members of the Order of the Phoenix here tonight and quite possibly right now your back-up is lying dead or captured. Seeing as I have no wand I don't see why you shouldn't be able to accomplish your task now. Alone!"

When Malfoy didn't respond, nor move Dumbledore continued with, "Oh I see. You're scared to act until they are here."

Malfoy not like being told what he was feeling shot back, "I am not afraid, it's you who should be afraid."

"Why Draco? I don't think you will kill me Draco, nor do I think you could. Killing is not as an easy thing as people believe it to be. No I don't think you will be able to."

Hermione shook her head. Please let it be so. Don't let him kill Dumbledore. Malfoy was wasting time. He had so many opportunities but he kept one waiting. Something Hermione hoped to mean he was going to chicken out.

"So tell me while we wait for your friends, how you smuggled them in? It seems to have taken you a lot of thought and energy to come up with the final plan," even at this time Dumbledore's eyes still twinkled invitingly, waiting for Malfoy to spill his story.

Something he was all to relieved to do if it bought him more time. The strangest part of the whole thing Hermione observed was the reversal of roles. Dumbledore was the one controlling the situation but he was the victim here. Draco on the other hand was being led around by his hand and begging for every chance to postpone what was about to happen.

Draco adjusted his wand, pointing it directly at Dumbledore's heart and then began, "The Vanishing Cabinet. I had to mend the Vanishing Cabinet that nobody's used for years. The one Montague got lost in last year."

"That was clever," Dumbledore half sighed, half moaned, "There is a pair, I take it?"

"Yeah, Borgin and Burkes is where the other is. They make a sort of passage between them. I figured out that there may be a way into the school if I fixed the broken cabinet because of what Montague described in his story."

"Very good."

"Montague said that he was caught in limbo between Hogwarts and the shop. He could hear things happening in both spots but couldn't get anybody to hear him."

It was brilliant Hermione had to admit. Not many people could figure such a thing out.

"There were times when you didn't believe everything was going to work out. You thought your plan was going to fall through and so you resorted to cruder but worthless attempts to get to me."

"Yeah, well you still didn't realize who was behind that stuff, did you?" Malfoy sneered.

"As a matter of fact, I did," Dumbledore replied.

"Why didn't you stop me then?" demanded Malfoy arrogantly.

"I tried, Professor Snape has been keeping watch over you on my orders-"

Hermione felt like she had just crawled out of a year long hibernation to realize the world had changed and left her behind. How could all of this have been going on and right under her noise? She shook her head, she was so naive.

"He hasn't been doing your orders, he promised my mother-"

It was the time for cutting each other's sentences off because Dumbledore did so by saying, "Of course that is what he would tell you Draco, but-"

"He's a double-agent, you stupid old man, he isn't working for you, you just think he is!"

The problem with double agents is they can tell both side's they are with them and both side's believe them. All the while skirting both side's order's because it would make the other side to suspicious. Who was to say that Snape hadn't been telling Draco that he was on his side and pretending to be setting Dumbledore up when all the while he was with Dumbledore from the very beginning. It made Hermione's head spin to just think about it.

"I have one question. You must have had an accomplice outside of the school. Ah yes Rosmerta," Dumbledore answered his own question, "The necklace from her bathroom, the poisoned mead. You had her under the Imperius Curse. But may I ask, how where you contacting her. We had or thought we had all of the communications methods in and out of the school covered?"

"Coins. Enchanted coins. She had one and I had the other in which I could send her messages."

Hermione squeezed her eyes shut. The little bastard. As much as she hated him for doing such a thing she hated herself more. He had gotten the idea from her. She had dropped her handful of coins one day and he had picked them up for her and noticed the one strange DA coin. After enquiring about it she had explained that it was a way for her to contact her friends in the school.

"Isn't that the secret method of communication the group that called themselves Dumbledore's Army used last year?" Dumbledore asked.

"Yeah I got the idea from them," Malfoy shot it off with a gentle wave of his hand. Sometime in the conversation he had regained his confidence because it was no longer evident that his hands were shaking, "I also got the idea of poisoning the mead from the Mudblood Granger. I overheard her talking about Filch not recognizing poisons..."

Ahhh! Hermione wanted to scream but she held it in. She didn't remember saying any of this stuff. When had this happened? She'd always tried to keep such a conversation like that at the minimal. Almost as if she knew that he couldn't be trusted.

"Please don't use that word," Dumbledore said gently.

"What mudblood? You really care about one word when I am going to kill you?"

"Yes I do. And as for killing me Draco you have had several long minutes now. We are very much alone. I am more defenseless than you could have ever dreamed of and still you have not acted."

The fighting was drawing nearer. The sounds were elevating in volume. It sounded like the fight was just inside the doors on the spiral staircase.

"There is little time, one way or another so let us discuss your options, Draco."

"My options," Malfoy screamed, "I'm standing here with a wand-I'm about to kill you-:

Hermione knew by now like Dumbledore obviously did that Draco was not going to follow through. He had delayed and delayed to much already. His heart wasn't in it. Hermione wanted to go and step out into the open, reveal herself and pull Draco over to her and away from this whole mess. They'd forget what had happened and quite possibly would even wake up lying in bed and find that it had all been one crazy dream. That was not going to happen and reality had to sink in. He wasn't a good person. Sure he hadn't killed but he was trying to. He was not innocent, that was for sure.

Just as Dumbledore was going to resume his bargaining the doors where thrust open and four figures rushed out.

"Dumbledore cornered!" the one said, "Dumbledore wandless, Dumbledore alone! Well done, Draco, well done!"

One figure made a comment and Dumbledore responded by saying, "Is that you Fenier? I'm a little shocked that Draco here invited you, of all people, into the school where his friends live. You are after all attacking people without even having the full moon. Developed a taste for human flesh that can't be satisfied once a month now have you?"

"I didn't invite him," Draco shuttered, "I didn't know he was going to come-"

"Get moving," the fourth Death Eater said, "We've got orders. Draco's got to do it. Now, Draco, and quickly."

Malfoy looked like a small child. His head was flipping back and forth as he watched the words pass through the air that had been exchanged by both parties. Malfoy looked terrified to put it nicely.

"Now Draco," barked one of the men.

The fight had almost broken to the outside.

"Now!"

Malfoy's hands had resumed shaking and now he could hardly grasp his wand let alone aim it.

"Draco do it, or stand aside so one of us-" screeched the one woman as Greyback charged forward put was halted by a blast from another's wand.

The doors burst open one more time and out flew Snape with his wand clutched dangerously at his side.

"Severus," the voice was small, childlike and pleading. Dumbledore was begging. Strong Dumbledore, powerful Dumbledore, the only person Voldemort had ever feared was pleading for his life.

Snape pushed his way through until he was standing facing Dumbledore with nobody, not even Draco left between them. He had pushed Draco out of the way.

"Severus...please...."

Snape raised his wand and pointed it directly at Dumbledore.

"Avada Kedavra!"

The jet of green light was blinding and Hermione didn't need to see it hit Dumbledore squarely in the chest for her to realize what had happened. Relief and sadness washed over her at the same time. Relief because it hadn't been Draco that had had to perform the final task but sadness at herself for being relieved. After all Dumbledore was still dead and Draco had orchestrated the whole thing.

"Out of here quickly," Snape snarled as he seized Malfoy by the scruff of the neck and pulled him along beside him. The other four Death Eater's followed closely behind.

Hermione was frozen in place when she saw out of nowhere launch Harry. The invisibility cloak. He had witnessed the whole thing as well. He stunned the last Death Eater and then too off after the rest he ran. Hermione wasn't that far behind.

It was from the top of the hill that she watched Draco being dragged through the Hogwarts gates by the murderous Snape. It was there that she caught the last glimpse of him before he apparated away to safety and it was there that she saw him turn around at the last second and look directly at her. Locking eyes just long enough for her to know that he had seen her before he disappeared from her life for a very long time. It was there that she collapsed to the ground sobbing. For Dumbledore, for Draco, for Harry who had lost another father and for herself.

xxx.:.x.

a/n whew it's late, i've got school tomorrow but I simply couldn't stop so I have to make this Hope you enjoyed. Reviews are very much appreciated thanks.


	18. Results

Hermione dragged herself back up to the school in a daze. She didn't remember walking up the steps and through the corridors. Apparently she blended in because nobody commented on the state she was in. By now word had begun to trickle through the school about Dumbledore's death and so her fellow students waved Hermione's tear streaked face for sorrow. It was sorrow just not what they believed it to be.

In the hospital wing Hermione was shocked to see the number of people crowded into the small room. On the bed lay a figure so mangled she couldn't decipher who it was. The red hair eventually gave it away and she gasped. It was a Weasley that much was evident. Hermione's head spun around the room as she searched for the one who wasn't standing. Relief over swept her when she saw Ron standing near the window. That feeling she quickly stamped out when she realized what it was. Ron was searching for her as well apparently because not much after he had appeared at her side.

"Greyback got him," he explained.

After seeing the puzzled expression on Hermione's red face he clarified by saying, "Yeah its Bill. Hard to tell isn't it? They say he probably will never fully heal."

"Where were you?" Hermione asked Ron, "as this was all going on."

"Oh well I could ask the same of you," Ron said mildly.

Thankfully Hermione didn't have to come up with a quick lie because the door opened and in walked Ginny escorting Harry. Harry who looked like a body with no soul. The poor guy. Hermione only partly knew how he felt. What she was feeling now, as bad as it was she knew didn't even come close to Harry's emotions right then.

Everyone's eyes fell on the boy who once again had a survivors story to tell. He told it but like always it was downplayed. There was nothing heroic about it.

Although Hermione had witness the exact same thing she listened intently to Harry's version. The worst part was when he said, "and Malfoy came through the door and disarmed him."

By saying those words Harry had sealed any bit of doubt Hermione had about what had happened tightly away. It was true, Malfoy, her Draco had intended to kill Dumbledore and whether he would have never actually followed through or if he was just interrupted to soon she would never know.

As the day's slowly dragged on as the remaining students waited for Dumbledore's funeral Harry, Ron, Ginny and Hermione spent most of their time together but talked little of what had happened that night under the tower. Hermione still hadn't divulged the information that she had too played witness to the final moments of Dumbledore's life. She doubted she ever would.

The student body was packed into the Great Hall awaiting the call to proceed down to the grounds when Harry nudged his friends and nodded in the direction of the Slytherin's Table. This wasn't the first time Hermione had looked over and been saddened but also a tiny bit shocked before she fully remembered that he was gone.

"This may sound strange and all," Harry began, "but it's strange not to see him over there."

In the direction he was indicating was Crabbe and Goyle. Both boys looked lost without their demanding leader telling them their every move.

"You know," Harry began quietly as if they were merely thoughts slipping into his speech, "He put his wand down. I haven't really thought much about since I've been more focused on Snape but I can't help but think that Malfoy put his wand down."

I can't help it either Hermione thought.

"And after all that he's done to us I feel kinda sorry for him."

Hermione squeezed her eyes closed and Ginny grasped her hand tightly, hidden under the table. Harry was talking as if he never knew about Hermione and Malfoy's relationship.

"You know what I mean? You really can't help but pity him for what he's like," then Harry shook his head again, "he put his wand down."

He did. It was a relief to Hermione to admit such a thing. It meant that she hadn't fully misjudged him. As she stood there overlooking the events unfold she had never stepped in to stop anything. Maybe she had been to scared but she didn't think that was it. She believed that she never thought he would actually go all the way. Even with him standing there with his wand raised she trusted him. In the end he never killed Dumbledore. Did that mean that one day if she saw him again she would be able to forgive him?

Hermione's thought's were interrupted by McGonagall abruptly standing up and explaining the directions to the many students waiting. Following their head's of houses the students began to slowly file out of the stuffy hall.

The funeral drew a massive crowd but nobody remembered much of the ceremony. The people that were only there because their title or job forced them to be sat throughout the whole thing with their minds else where. Those that were there to pay their final respects to a great man were so choked up that they couldn't focus on anything or anybody. When the noise level began to rise once again Hermione saw through her tears Harry lean over to talk to Ginny.

You asshole she wanted to scream. You're going to do it here? A few day's before Ginny had approached Hermione with her fears. She knew that Harry was going to break up with her and go off to save the world. The day's passed, one at a time and nothing happened. Hermione tried to reason that it was not going to happen but every time Ginny shot her down.

Ron sidled up to Hermione and pulled her into a hug and let her cry on his shoulder. The tears poured out of her. Tears for Dumbledore, tears for Ginny who'd finally found her prince only to have him run off again, herself for falling for the lion, Malfoy for not being able to choose his family, Harry who had lost to many times before and Ron who was obviously falling in love with herself. a feeling that was going unrequited.

Hermione didn't hear any of Harry's heart wrenching words, nor did she want to. From the looks of Ginny's face she wasn't shocked. Of course she was saddened but she had seen it coming. Nodding she side stepped around her now ex and walked in the opposite direction of the crowd. Harry slumped down into his chair and placed his head in his hands. When Hermione pulled away Ron looked at her quizzingly but she nodded her head in Harry's direction. Instantly Ron understood when his vision captured the image of Ginny walking away from everyone.

Taking off after Ginny, Hermione stumbled her way through the crowds. Managing to step on only a few people's feet. She caught up to Ginny as she started to round the lake.

"Gin I'm so sorry," Hermione said.

Ginny picked up a handful of rocks and threw them into the water. They pinged across the surface and then disappeared into the watery depth. Ginny didn't turn right away but when she did Hermione could see that she was not yet crying.

"You know what hurts the most?" Ginny seethed.

Knowing it was best to let her go at it Hermione prompted with a simple, "What?"

"He's leaving. Going off to save the world and he say's he's going to do it alone, no help,"

"Yeah," wanting to add your point being but deciding against it Hermione stopped.

"Obviously you and Ron are going to beg and beg until finally he gives in and let's you accompany him. Me I'll beg and beg but he will not budge."

"He's trying to protect you."

"I don't need protecting. I know damn well what I was getting into when I got together with him. I'd rather die at his side fighting than be stuck at home with my Mother," she screamed.

"Ginny, calm down."

"Don't you dare tell me to calm down. You don't know what this is like. Every time you get to go but not once has he willingly asked me to come and stand at his side. I can fight just as well as any of you and-"

"Damn it Ginny," Hermione interrupted, "he's doing it because he-"

"Don't tell me why he's doing it. Ten-seconds ago I heard the excuse come out of his lips. Its still fresh on my ears. I really don't care. I told him I understand his reasoning, really I do. It's just I don't agree with it," lowering her voice an octave she continued, "You don't know what its like to not be able to control what's going to happen. Not knowing what's happening and who if anybody are going to come back. You've always been there. You're one of them," she spat out the last words making Hermione cringe, "I love him. I believe in what WE'RE fighting for just as much as he does, as you or Ron do," with that she stormed back up towards the castle. That was the last time Ginny mentioned anything about her true feeling's towards Harry. In front of everyone she made it out that she was doing wonderfully but briefly she had let the veil slip, revealing the true scenery behind it.

xxx.:.x.

It would be a number of long painful month's before Hermione would ever lay eyes on Draco again. Each day that passed was not free of a least one wandering thought about him. Even during the darkest of day's during the Trio's Horcrux search Hermione still found herself dreaming about her perfect life month's before. How she wished now for one moment with him, she didn't care if it was hidden away in a room, away from everyone's knowledge. She just wanted to be near him. The worst part of the whole ordeal was that she didn't know if he was even alive. What if when the war ended she emerged back into society only to be hit with the horrible news? News that she would have to fake excitement over.

xxx.:.x.

He'd never been so terrified in his life. Ever since June he had lived in a constant state of fear. His Mother would never look at him for more than a fleeted glance and his Father tried to avoid being in the same room with him. It was nothing like they had promised him it would be.

Exhaustion was always present because he got barely any sleep and when he did finally get time to lie down his dreams were plagued with images of Hermione. Ever since the summer he had heard nothing about her whereabouts. Apparently her, Potter and Weasley had gone underground. Not knowing her whereabouts also meant he didn't know about her well being. The only thing that kept him semi sane was the fact that if she had been killed it would not be kept quite. At least she was alive.

News reached him not much later. It was both the best and worst news he'd heard in a very long time but also very troubling. "Harry Potter had been captured!"

Draco knew that Hermione would never leave Potter's side so that meant that she would be tagging along as well. "They've got a mudblood as well as a blood traitor!"

Hearing his name being called Draco followed the order and walked over to his mother, "Our son Draco has returned for his Easter Break. If it is Potter as you claim it to be he will now. He went to school with the boy."

Those words meant that they weren't sure. It could be anybody for all they knew. As much as he would have loved to come face to face with Hermione again this was not the right time or place. He would have much rather had her out hiding, but safe. Continuing the fight against the one he had pledged to serve because of his families inability to serve. It had sounded like a good idea at the time, a noble one. Those were petty school boy dreams of power and fortune. Look where that got his father. Now he held onto the shred of hope that the Order would come through as they had before.

"Take a look Draco, is it Potter?" Lucius Malfoy asked extremely excitedly.

Despite the swollen face Draco knew instantly that it was. What he did next was not for he benefit of Potter but for Hermione and for the end of the war. Standing off in the corner was a captured Hermione. His heart sank instantly when he made eye contact with her. When his father asked him again if it was Potter, Hermione gave a small shake of her head. One so small that he might have second guessed his eyesight if he didn't know her better.

"I can't tell," Draco said cautiously, "That may be a scar there, I don't really know."

"Well what about this one?"

The person holding Hermione thrust her towards him. She lost her footing and fell at his feet. Grabbing her roughly by the hair he yanked her back up to her feet and a slight scream penetrated her lips.

"Shut up mudblood. It's her right, the mudblood Granger?" Lucius snarled.

Excitedly Narcissa screeched, "Yes it is. I saw her in Madame Malkins. It's her, it's Granger right Draco?"

"I...well...yeah," it slipped out before he could stop it and he kicked himself afterwards. He may have just signed her Death Warrant. Trying to right his wrong he shot out, "I don't know," but it was no use, they'd already moved on. Sinking into the nearest chair he managed to get off his feet seconds before a feared black out. His head was spinning and his gut was rolling. Now that he was sitting he only feared that he would loose his supper all over the ornate rugs.

Out of the corner of his eye he caught Hermione's fleeted glances in his direction. She was asking for his help, he knew that much. He just didn't know what he could do. He would be the first to admit here that he was not the smart one. The trio had always been the one with the plan, he only ever followed orders. He wasn't smart or cunning, just stupid. A follower hungry for power.

It was at that point that Draco noticed Greyback hovering over Harry like the hungry monster that he was. Draco's Mother had not liked Greyback and so he could see the fear edging over her and it began to sweep over him. Both of them knew that Greyback although pledged to be on there side was really only looking for his next capture and if it was a Malfoy or a Weasley it didn't really matter to him.

Draco's dear Aunt Bellatrix was the next to arrive bringing with her another whirlwind of drama. Always wishing to be the one in charge and ever trying to secure her spot next to the Dark Lord Bellatrix never ceased to amaze him with what she would do, even turning against her own family. Demanding that things be done her way she told Draco to go and dispose of the trio's captures, "If you don't have the guts to do it I will," she barked.

Another order. One that he dreaded instantly.

Narcissa came quickly to her son's defence, "Don't you dare talk to Draco like that," she seethed.

Bellatrix rebounded with a worded punch directed at her sisters diaphragm. A shot that Narcissa would have gladly traded for a physical blow.

"Now this situation is graver than we had ever imagined," Bellatrix continued on as if nothing out of the ordinary had occurred, "Now take them all down to the cellar," she paused, "Ah except the mudblood."

"No take me instead," Ron bellowed.

How those simple words hurt Draco so much. He'd always known that Hermione had had feelings for the Weasle and yet unknown to him he felt the same way about her. It was blatantly obvious. Now with all the time spent alone Draco feared that something had finally bought them together. It wasn't just a friend who would exchange himself for another because Potter had not jumped up so quickly to volunteer himself.

"Oh how noble of you, but if she dies in questioning I'll take you next. After all blood-traitor is next in line to mudblood in my books."

Draco didn't want to hang around as Bellatrix pulled out her wand and focused it on Hermione's heart. What was he supposed to do? They'd kill him if he stopped them. He knew that his own family wouldn't hesitate to turn their wands on him. That was the kind of people they were.

Hermione's screamed pierced through his thoughts, pulling him back to the cold reality at hand. He was a coward, that much he knew. Did it make it any better if he admitted that?

"Ahhhh!" it hurt his ears. He'd heard her scream out before. The last time had been different. They had been making love. Her scream had been in pleasure, not pain.

"Tell me," Bellatrix screeched, "Where did you get the sword?"

"We found it, we found it...please," she begged. Regaining her footing she took a split second look over at Draco, begging him to stop the whole ordeal. The sadness in her eyes proved right away that as much as she could hope she knew that he would never stop the cruel acts.

"You lie. Where did you get it? CRUCIO."

"What else did you take? Answer me!"

The curses were coming fast and strong and the whole time Draco's brain was swimming and slowly shutting down. He couldn't take much more of this, then it abruptly stopped.

"Go get the goblin Draco," Bellatrix demanded.

Taking any excuse to escape Draco practically ran out of the room and down into the cellar where he roughly grabbed the little ugly runt and dragged him back up the stairs to be tortured. As long as it took Bellatrix's mind off of Hermione.

Bellatrix had only begun to torture the goblin when out of nowhere she threw a curse at an unsuspecting Hermione. Draco watched stunned as she held the curse. Hermione withered and screamed on the floor. Only when Draco was sure permanent damage had been done did Bellatrix finally lift her wand. Hermione's crumpled form laid unmoving at Bellatrix feet. Guilt washed over Draco and he was prepared to step directly into the fire of Bellatrix's next curse and wait it out until he too fell.

Draco's mind had wandered far away from the now resuming torture of the goblin he was focused to much on Hermione.

"Now I think, we can dispose of the mudblood," Bellatrix said cooly.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" Weasley came bursting into the Drawing Room at the exact moment and quickly disarmed Bellatrix. Potter caught the wand and quickly sent a stunner which connected with Draco's father. Good riddance Draco thought as his father crumpled into a heap on the hearth. The only thing that had stopped Draco's action of turning his wand on his aunt was the unexpected entrance of Weasley and Potter. With that Draco knew that Hermione would be brought to safety because in a fight he could aid them without blowing his cover.

Jumping in to join the fight Draco began firing curses left and right. They were meaningless spells. One's that resembled dark curses but in reality were only the replication of the shots of light. He'd discovered the spells during his fourth year and learned them. Figuring one day they may come in handy and they proved him right.

The rapid fire was broken by Bellatrix's cold voice shouting, "STOP OR SHE DIES."

Pressed up against Hermione's throat was a small dagger.

"Lower your wands or we'll see how filthy her blood really is," she demanded.

Ron and Harry obliged and placed their wands on the ground.

"Now Draco go pick them up," she ordered.

What was he going to do now? He debated over his options as he strolled leisurely over to retrieve the wands.

"Now let's tie them back up as we give Greyback Miss Mudblood here."

Now was his last chance to act. He had to do something. He couldn't let her die. He was about to shoot a curse across the room when from up above came a horrible grinding noise. Second's later he was knocked off of his feet by a heavy and sharp object flying into him. Feeling the blood pouring out of a large, deep gash on his cheek he realized that somebody had let the chandelier loose.

Draco saw him coming. Potter had acted quickly, taking the split second delay to jump onto Draco and wrestle the wands out of his grasp. Second's after he willingly released the wands he was hauled out of further arms way by his Mother. He tried to fight against her but he couldn't. It was a horrible feeling to be powerless. At least he'd managed to help the trio out somehow. He hoped that with the wands they'd be able to make their getaway and be able to fight for one more day.

"Dobby, you dropped the chandelier?"

The question stopped everyone dead in their tracks.

"Kill him now."

The chaos resumed once again but Draco didn't bear witness to any of it because at the same time he felt himself slip into unconsciousness.

xxx.:.x.

a/n Hmm one more chapter left. I can't believe I'm almost done another story. Sad really but I'm also kinda excited because I have another story all mapped out and I have a feeling I'm really going to enjoy writing it. So for the second to last time for this story what did you think? Please review.


	19. Sacrifice

As the chaos of Easter turned into only a painful memory, Draco returned for the last time to the isolated Hogwarts Castle where students were only told what it was believed they should know about the war. Nothing! Because of his status Draco was an exception to that rule. He and a select few other students had been privy to the news that had been censored for the other students and teachers.

As the Battle of Hogwarts loomed closer and closer the underage students were quickly evacuated from the once safe castle. Word was trickling through the fortress that Potter was in their midst and with Potter came Hermione. This time Draco resolved he would not stand by and watch her be tortured or worse. She probably never forgive him for what he had allowed to happen but he couldn't still help her out if need be. He wouldn't be a coward this time, he was better of dead because he knew what the guilt felt like and he didn't want to ever experience that again. This time he wouldn't stand back out of fear because he didn't care what his fate was as long as he protected her.

Draco knew that he should be in the dungeons where the students turned Death Eaters were being given their orders. He'd had enough though, he wasn't prepared to fight for them any longer. Searching throughout the castle he tried desperately to catch a glimpse of Hermione. While running up one staircase Draco ran smack into Crabbe and Goyle who had been downstairs receiving their orders which were to guard the Room of Hidden Things. It seemed like a pretty good bet that if guards had been placed on such a seemingly unimportant space it must hold some secret, one they didn't want Potter primarily to get access to. And so they sped off in the direction of the Room of Requirements. A place that played host to the events of Draco's best and worst days at school.

Skirting through the battle raging around them they made their way into the hidden room. It was eerily quite as they paced back and forth through the overcrowded pathways that wound through the stuffed room. At some points the paths disappeared because of an overflow of junk. Then they were forced to either turn around on their patrol or lumbar over the ancient piles of dusty material.

What was hidden amidst the centuries of rubbish Draco asked himself as trudged through the room? Why would they have placed Crabbe and Goyle there?

The answer would soon become clear as the far off behind them the door eased itself open. Assuming that nobody would ever actually enter such a place Draco had never placed anybody on guard at the door and so he didn't he the silent entry of the three former Gryffindors, nor did he hear them split up in search of the final item that would aid in the vanquish of the Dark Lord.

Only when the footsteps neared himself did he spin around and duck out of the way. Jet black hair instantly gave away who the intruder was as he walked just inches away from Draco.

Stepping out from his hiding spot Draco commanded, "Hold it right there Potter."

Harry spun around and drew his wand but Draco already had his out and between them the burly Crabbe and Goyle's wand's were extended and directed right at Harry's heart.

Disgust rippled through Draco as he identified the wand in Potter's hand. He recognized it well for it was his own, "That's my wand you have there Potter," the wand Draco had surrendered during the battle at the Manor had been replaced by his Mothers. It didn't work as well as he would have liked. Actually it barely co operated at all but Draco was glad to have the little comfort it possessed.

"Who's wand is that you've got?" Harry asked.

"My Mothers," Draco hated to admit it for he feared it made him sound weak, a Momma's Boy when he was exactly the opposite.

"What are you doing here?" Harry said as he edged his way backwards. Draco's gut was telling him that those words were not asked because he cared, he was buying time.

"Potter I practically lived in the Room of Hidden Things last year," Draco said. Silently he also added the Room of Requirement in general to his confession, after all whenever he had left Hermione with the excuse of going to his Common Room he had hid outside waiting for her to leave and then he'd re enter to work on his project. He hadn't slept much the previous year.

Draco's head was spinning. He didn't want to help Potter but he knew that if he did then that would benefit Hermione's survival. Goyle and Crabbe's backs were to him and they were both slow. He couldn't probably stun one and turn his wand on the other before they knew what was happening. Harry's instincts would be to use the commotion to grab what he was looking for and get out to safety or whatever loomed outside.

"Harry are you talking to someone?" a voice bellowed over the tall piles.

Draco's heart sunk when he saw Crabbe's large arm rise and aim at the high mountain of old furniture. His stomach dropped to the ground as he watch helplessly the pile begin to teeter and then tumble.

A spell was shot from Harry that steadied the new mass of debris and Draco screamed, "Stop you idiots," to Crabbe and Goyle who discovered they liked making piles of junk come crashing to the floor around them.

"We're not listening to your order's anymore. You and your Father are both finished."

In his heart Draco knew they were right. His Father had only survived this long because of Draco who had screwed up. It was a wonder they both hadn't been killed yet but their own Death Eaters. That's why Draco's decision came so easily to him. The real question was why should he support a cause where the people he called friends he could just as easily call his enemies. He might as well integrate himself in with his enemies. At least then there were no games. They were always his enemies. The rest of the night he would fight but not for the Dark Side. He was through with their ideas, but he wouldn't fight for the Light. After all he didn't like or believe in their ideas as well. Tonight he would fight for survival and that meant he would be neutral. At this point he didn't want either side to win-he'd be prosecuted either way-he just wanted it all to end.

A scream echoed through the room as it bounced off of walls and junk, jarring Draco's thoughts back to the reality that was before him. Hermione!

In the midst of the noise and movement Draco saw Harry lunge in the opposite direction of the now blocked exit. Reaching out for an ancient tiara, Harry's hands closed around the metal and removed it in one fluid motion from its perch. Crabbe's attention had been snagged by the sudden movement and he directed his wand at the words of the Cruciatious Curse formed on his lips.

"STOP!" Draco screamed and order once again. This time he hoped it wouldn't fall on deaf ears. Realizing what he had done he quickly added, "The Dark Lord wants him alive."

"It's not going to kill him. Even if it was who cares, the Dark Lord only wants him dead."

Nothing more was said because at that time Hermione pushed her way through to the action and sent a stunner in the direction of Crabbe. The scarlet light nearly hit Harry in the process but missed it's target who was pulled out of the way at the last second. Not liking being fired at Crabbe returned fire alongside Goyle.

"It's the mudblood," Crabbe yelled as he prepared to perform the Killing Curse.

Harry reacted quickly and sent a stunner at Crabbe who in turn dove out of the way and while doing so knocked Draco's borrowed wand out of his grasp and under and mound of boxes and broken furniture.

Unarmed Draco had no way to stop what was unfolding before him, "Don't kill him, DON'T KILL HIM!"

Crabbe and Goyle's split second hesitation opened a window of opportunity for Harry who expertly disarmed both of them. What happened next Draco had no clue. He knew that a mix of green and red light was exchanged but he couldn't decipher who send it or if any found their targets. The next thing he knew he heard screams and felt the searing pain of being to close to a large fire. Jumping to his feet he flew through the maze in search of the exit, with the hungry fire on his tale. Hermione had disappeared he realized when as he looked through the flames and smoke he could only see Goyle and Crabbe. Out of nowhere from the sky plunged Harry on a broomstick. They were surrounded by flames and Draco knew that this was where he was going to die. What a horrible way to die, but then again it would save him having to face the Death Eaters. His only thoughts were about Hermione as the flames raged closer and closer to his flesh. The heat searing his skin.

Unexpectedly the broomstick with Potter on it swooped down beside him. Without thinking his survival instincts clicked in and he clambered up onto the broom. He saw beside them was another floating broom with Weasley on it and thankfully behind him, Hermione. They were pulling Goyle up alongside them.

Up into the air they flew but Harry made an unscheduled detour as he made a hairpin turn and raised in the opposite direction of the door.

"What the hell are you doing, the doors that way?" Draco screamed out of terror.

Swooping back into the flames Potter stuck his arm out and reached for something that looked like it was to far away from him to catch. The reason they called him the Youngest Seeker in a Century became evident as miraculously his hand closed around the item. Seconds later they had turned back around and flew towards the door. Draco's eyes were stinging but still he kept them open as he searched for the other broomstick.

A wave of cool air hit them almost as hard as they hit the opposite wall. With a thud Draco fell off the broom and landed on the ground. His stomach turned over one final time and let loose his last meal all over the floor. The sight of the person sprawled next to him was enough to clear his head. Beside him, coughing and with burnt hair and blackened face was Hermione. Relief surged through him but it didn't last long as he watched helplessly as they struggled to their feet and raced off to fight once more. She was one tough girl to keep up with he had to admit.

Wrestling his way to his feet he noticed the absence of one person. Goyle was sprawled out across the corridor but Crabbe was nowhere to be seen. With no sadness Draco realized that his once friend had not made it out of the burning monster.

With a rough kick from Draco, Goyle lumbered to his feet and pounded off to help the Death Eaters. Draco hung back a second and then sunk into the shadows. He would follow her, watch her back for her.

xxx.:.x.

When Harry had sunk into a dive Hermione had screamed at him to not be stupid. Ron said that if they die because of Malfoy well... To tell Harry to turn around had been one of her most painful split second decisions. She kept telling herself that she didn't care. He didn't stop her from being tortured to within and inch of insanity so why should they save his sorry ass. As much as she kept chanting that to herself she couldn't brush away the relief she felt when she saw Malfoy jump onto Harry's broom. To her disgust the large oaf Goyle was hauled by Ron up behind her on their broom. For one long second she didn't think they'd be able to fly with all the extra weight. Amazingly enough they soared up into the air once again and made it out safely into the cool corridor. Panic overwhelmed her when she didn't see Harry's broom come zooming out closely behind them. Fateful seconds ticked by and they still didn't appear. Squeezing her eyes closed in hopes that when she would open them things would be different, she was delighted to find that they were. A broomstick with two exact opposites emerged.

Holding back a laugh as they careened into the opposite wall she was relieved to see that they were safe. What made it even better was when Harry cried out that the diadem had been broken and the horcrux thus destroyed. Their glee wasn't able to last for long because minutes later the reality of the battle they were fighting would finally hit them in the worst possible way. Harry and Ron now fully recovered gathered themselves up and raced over to assist in the fighting down the corridor from them. Hermione was a bit slower getting herself together. On her feet glanced back at Draco. It was not something she wanted to do, nor something she was proud of, she should have just walked away but she couldn't. His eyes met her eyes briefly and held for a split second before she broke the connection out of shame. She knew she should never have been friends with him let alone sleep with him, she knew what he was like, who he associated with.

Harry and Ron had made their way to the end of the corridor by this time and Hermione raced to catch up to them. One little detail that kept plaguing her was something that should have held no importance in such a grave situation but it did. She found it quite ironic that Harry and Draco were exact opposites and their hair colour matched that, but that Harry while on the light side had jet black hair, Malfoy had white hair and he was the dark one. Shaking her head she let out a small laugh, it was amazing what the brain could come up with.

xxx.:.x.

When Voldemort had announced to everyone that Potter was dead Draco had been shocked how things had resulted and shocked at his own sadness. A feeling he'd never expected to have nor would he ever reveal having. As much as they'd been enemies Draco had to admit that Potter had saved his life. Twice in fact that night alone. The more troubling truth came not much later. If Potter was dead it was almost guaranteed that the Dark Side had won. He would probably be okay but Hermione he knew would not be. Being a mudblood was bad enough in the eyes of the Dark Lord but fighting for the Order and helping Potter put her as most likely the first to meet her fate. A fate that would not be pleasant.

Then all of a sudden things spun in the opposite direction and the chaos resumed once again. Apparently the corpse of Potter had mysteriously vanished. Screams echoed out from The Great Hall and along with everyone else Draco rushed into the castle just in time to see his Aunt Bellatrix fall. His Mother would be devastated. She had both hated and loved her sister dearly. To Draco it wouldn't be the much of a loss. Sure she was his aunt but he knew that she was the only reason why his Mother hadn't walked away from the whole Malfoy deal.

In one corner of the hall Draco could see Hermione fighting off one of the Death Eaters and without thinking he raced over to help her. From a safe distance he shot a stunner and took down the cloaked man. Hermione spun around to see who had sent the scarlet curse and when her eyes met Draco's her lips formed into both a smile and a grimace. There was no time for much more because Hermione noticed one of her friends loosing their battle and so she raced over to help.

Draco planned to continue to watch over her but he was whisked away by his anguished Mother.

"Draco you're okay," she cried with tears of relief streaming down her face, "I thought you were dead...and...and," she couldn't get out much more through her blubbering. It was an unusual act by her. Draco didn't believe he had ever seen her cry or show any emotions for that matter.

Lucius' usually steady hand shook as he placed it on his son's shoulder and led him through the duelling crowds. Draco saw that Hermione was battling once again on her own and the Death Eater was right in their path. As they walked by Draco gave a quick flip of his wrist and the large man dropped like a pile of bricks to the ground. This time Hermione made more than just eye contact, she nodded. It was a step in the right direction Draco figured.

When Voldermort fell the cheers penetrated through the thick stone walls and seeped out into the night air. Throughout Britain celebrations were thrown together and glasses were raised as they had seventeen years before in toast of the Boy Who Lived.

Narcissa hadn't allowed Draco out of her sight at all since she had found her son in one piece and she had a hard time keeping her hands from hauling him into a permanent hug. A few times Draco tried to escape them but each time he was pulled back. With an excuse of having to use the bathroom Narcissa finally if not reluctantly let him go.

Not long before he'd saw her walk into the Great Hall but then quickly turn around and walk back out, he now hoped to find her. Wandering about the castle he checked all the obvious placed that she along with Weasley and Potter may have escaped to. Rounding a corner Draco told himself that he wouldn't go back until he found her. They needed to talk.

He found her and the Weasley walking down one of the destroyed corridors. They were pretty close together and Draco almost gagged when he saw the redhead reach his arm out and wrap it around Hermione's waist. He squeezed his eyes closed to calm his anger and then before he could decide on how to slip her away she turned around as if she could sense his presence and untangled herself from the Weasle's grasp. Quite words were exchanged and then he walked away unknowing of where she was going and who she was seeing. That much was evident because Draco knew that if Weasley knew he would never have left Hermione alone.

Cautiously Hermione strolled over to Draco. No words were exchanged between them, only glances. Neither of them could come up with the necessary words.

"Let's go somewhere other than here," Draco reached for her arm and led her down the staircases and outside. In the quite night air they walked side by side along the lake. It was peaceful enough for them to briefly forget the horrors that had just occurred at the castle and what had happened between them.

"You know," Hermione said breaking the silence, "I really should hate you..."

"You don't?" Draco responded. He was confused, what was wrong with her? He hated himself, why couldn't she?"

"No don't get me wrong, I hate, detest, loath, all those cruel words but at the same time I can't help but love you. That night at you place was one of the worst nights of my life. You betrayed me, I don't know what I was expecting you to do, no I do. I hoped with all my heart for you to stand between her and me but I knew you wouldn't, that's just the person that you are. With all that said I just have to say that it was the best year of my life being with you. Maybe if things had have been different we wouldn't be having this conversation. I don't really know. All I know is that I forgive you, I just want you to know that."

"Hermione I've wanted for so long to hear those words from you but know that you're actually saying them they don't feel right. I was a coward, I betrayed you and almost got you killed because of it. I was exactly the person you said I was all those years, a murderer and a coward. I'd hide behind my name and say that that justified what I did but it didn't, it never will. Please don't forgive me. Hate me, do something just don't say you forgive me because I know you don't."

There were no tears coming from her and that surprised Draco, he had always imagined this to be a conversation filled with anger, not remorse.

"Ron's not that bad of a guy you know," Hermione said, stunning Draco, "He and I could make a go of it."

"Hermione please no," Draco begged. He knew he deserved it, hell he deserved ten times that but it still didn't make it any easier hearing her say that, "Do you love him?"

"Well I did," she said quickly but then much quieter added, "At least I thought I did."

"Don't," he was now struggling to come up with the right words, his head wasn't working properly.

"I better go Draco," Hermione said sadly.

"Please no."

"Draco this is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I'll be honest with you I wish we could forget this ever happened, go on with our lives. I know we could make something good out of it. The thing is while I can forgive I simply can't forget what you did. I love you with all my heart but I can't be with you again so if that's why you came looking for me tonight I'm sorry," she raised her hand and rested it against his stone cold cheek. A tear trickled out of his eye and that was enough to push her over the edge. The tears streamed down her face but she made no attempt to wipe them away. Instead she wiped the single tear off of Draco's cheek.

"I love you. Maybe if things had have been different. We are...were perfect together," with that she pulled her hand away quickly as if she had been stung and ran back up to the safety of the castle leaving her final words to echo through Draco's brain.

Her reaction had been better than he had expected, she hadn't hit him or whatever else she could. He also never expected to get her back. His goal throughout the battle had been for them both to survive. He knew they'd never be together again but maybe she could still be happy. That much he could hope for.

And so he placed himself down on the grass as he watched her retreat back to a world that he'd never been allowed entry into. He had always been Malfoy and the result of the war would never change that.

xxx.:.x.

a/n So I know, I know you guys are all mad because it's not a happy ending and to be quite honest I am too and believe me I am not a fan of happy endings, I think they are so unrealistic, but in this case I'm struggling with this. So any ways what was your guy's thoughts on this chapter, this story in general? I also guess I should apologize for how long it took to get an update but if you guys would have seen my schedule you would understand. So reviews are greatly appreciated and thanks to all those that have. If I get a lot of feedback I might be able to give you a nice gift in the form of an epilogue but that's up for you to decide. Cheers and thanks for reading, I hoped you enjoyed this story because I have.


	20. Epiloque

It was a pleasantly warm day, not to hot but nice enough that a sweater was not necessary. There wasn't a cloud in sight and the weather was predicted to turn hot the following day. It was about time, it was after all the first week of August. They'd been blanketed by a late snow storm in April and then rain and wind had been present through much of July. Everyone had panicked that they would have to move the crowds indoors from the spacious garden but their luck had changed when they awoke to find the angry weather of the last months had finally passed. Looking out the window she looked down on the people mingling, waiting for the ceremony to begin.

She was alone for the moment and she was basking in the peacefulness. She hadn't had absolute quite in months, no make that years. Not since before they'd went off in search of the final horcrux's. After the war they had become instant celebrities. For a month afterwards they couldn't walk anywhere without a sea of media following them. They'd been interviewed for nearly a dozen different magazines and when her and Ron's relationship surfaced they'd been thrown into another whirlwind of media attention. It had almost been enough chaos for her to forget what she had walked away from beside the lake after the Battle of Hogwarts, almost!

It had been just over four years since the defeat of Voldermort and she had only laid eyes on him once since. It had been three years previous, the newly instated Ministry was finally stable once more and then they began the tedious journey of rounding up and prosecuting all those who had fought for or aided Voldermort. His trials had been one of the last ones because of the attention it arose. It had been the only thing that had captured the eagle eye of the media long enough to take the interest off of the Golden Trio as they had been dubbed.

Everyone had predicted a slam dunk case, opened and closed. That was not so. Hermione had followed the trial in the papers, and for the month that it lasted she barely slept. Her appetite had been non existent and everyone had feared she had some post traumatic stress or something like it. As the day of the verdict drew closer and closer and witnesses finished recounting their tales she finally made her decisions.

Sneaking out of the house was difficult, there were so many sets of eyes watching over her for her own safety but she managed okay. Once safety away she made her way to the Ministry of Magic. In the chamber's of the Wizengemot she was brought forward and told her story of how when she saw him in the battle he was taking down Death Eaters, not joining them. She left out the small detail of their intimate relationship but that didn't matter. The members of the Wizengemot had been shocked when she had requested to testify and had almost died when she turned and explained their defendants innocence.

Walking out of the chamber she was met by a wall of reporters which she refused to comment to. As the door closed behind her she caught her final glimpse of him, sitting helplessly in the prisoners chair. It was heartbreaking to see, he looked so defeated and scared, like a small terrified child. She never came back to hear the verdict.

The door opened suddenly, jarring her from her memories. Spinning around away from the window she let out a sigh of relief when she saw who it was.

"Ginny," she whispered sadly.

Ginny was fully dressed and made up with her hair done immaculately, "Why aren't you dressed?" she demanded, "Where is everyone?"

"I kicked them out."

"Why?"

"Because I needed some time to think."

"No what you need to do is get dressed. Hermione you're getting married in twenty minutes," she tried desperately to talk some sense into her friend.

Hermione didn't feel like arguing now with her best friend but she didn't know what else she could do. Beginning to talk she didn't get more than two words out before Ginny held up a silencing hand, grabbed her tightly by the wrist and dragged her over to her beautiful gown hanging from the door jam.

"Ginny please," Hermione begged as she pulled her hand away, "Give me a minute."

Ginny dropped Hermione's hand like it was a burning coal, "Talk to me," she whispered, "What's going on? This is supposed to be the happiest day of your life. A bit of nerves okay but you're a wreck."

Hermione flopped onto the bed and on cue the tears began to role. Ginny sat down beside her and pulled her friend close to her and rubbed her back comfortingly, "It's going to be okay, shhh," she murmured to Hermione who was letting out great hiccuping sobs, "Don't do it, don't do it out of duty."

"But Ginny he's so happy..."

"Don't you dare get going about that," Ginny fumed, "What about you? Are you happy because it sure as hell doesn't look like it. Nobody doing what they wanted would be such a wreck. You're in theory walking to your death. You're young still, twenty-two. There's a lot of guy's still out there, don't settle for the one that you don't love. Go and find the guy that will worship you but that you also can't live without."

"Ginny I've found him, I just can't be with him."

"And why not, is he dead?"

"No, of course not."

"Then why can't you be with him? What's stopping you from being together? Hermione please I'm begging you not to go with the one guy just because it's easy. You'll regret it later, you're already regretting it now."

"Ginny it'll never happen, not after what he did."

"I give up," Ginny stood up abruptly, knocking Hermione's bouquet of flowers to the ground, "Do what you think is best but I'm sorry don't come running to me when you realize you made the wrong choice. Now get dressed, you have ten minutes."

With that Ginny picked up her dress and hurdled out of the room, leaving a very confused and distraught Hermione in her wake.

A knock on the opened door caused Hermione to yell, "I don't want...just go away."

The footsteps didn't retreat, instead they got louder as the person walked towards her.

"I said leave me alone," she whimpered.

"Are you sure?" the person asked.

The voice she hadn't hear in so long but still she remembered it well. Her head flung upwards and she took in the features that had aged so much.

"What are you doing here? You can't be here. I'm getting married in ten minutes."

"No offence but you don't look like you want to be here and you sure don't look ready to walk down the aisle."

"When did you get so intelligent?" she whispered.

"Oh well I'd say probably during my year at Azkaban, You know it's a hell of a place."

"That's why I couldn't let you stay there, or worse, receive the...the..." she didn't have to finish for they both knew what his fate would have been if convicted.

"I never got to thank you," he whispered as he tenderly laid his palm on her cheek and turned her head in his direction. She didn't let her eyes meet his for the longest moment but then finally she relented.

"It's been five years since we were together, an awfully long time," she began.

"What are you saying?" he demanded.

"It's just, Ron loves me and..."

"For God's sakes Hermione cut the crap. Don't marry the guy. Please don't do it. Walk away from it all. I'd love for you to realize that maybe we could make a future together but to be quite honest I gave up on that dream along time ago," he said raising his voice an octave, "Don't marry him, go find somebody else. Somebody that you can love. If it's me that's wonderful but I just want you to be happy. Please give me that in life, I've lost you because of my stupidity."

He lowered himself down onto his knees so he was eye level with her, waiting for a response.

She didn't reply and the seconds ticked by. He didn't know what to do. He'd had his chance, made his pleas now it was up to her. Should he walk away and allow her to choose her path or wait around while she mulled over everything? Knowing he should walk away now he stood up and reached for her face which he gently pulled towards him and then he laid a tender kiss on her lips. Pulling away he looked at her one last time before walking out the door. He saw her pull herself to her feet and then he heard he murmur almost to quietly for him to make out the words, "I'm going to Germany. They offered me a job. I meant to turn it down but something made me wait."

He nodded, she had made one of the right decisions in his opinion, "Thank you."

"Now are you going to tell Ron or should I?" she chuckled on the brink of becoming hysterical.

"Couldn't you just leave without saying anything?"

"No, I at least owe him the truth."

"Well good luck, and I hope you find what you're looking for in Germany."

She looked up at him, "I hope you do too. You know if you want to maybe well come and visit you know..."

"Yeah."

"We can't just go back to the way things were."

"I never expected that."

"Yeah so, maybe if we just start again."

He was by her side instantly and had captured her lips with his in a passionate kiss. One that he hadn't felt the likes of since five years previous."

"What ever happened to taking it slow?"

"Where adults now, who gives a damn," he said as he picked her up off of the ground and spun her around causing the smile that had been wiped off her face years before to finally return, "You better go," she replied more solemnly, "I'll owl you when I get settled and maybe I'll see you around."

"You don't want any help unpacking or anything?" he suggested.

"Like I said, I think it best if we go at this like we've never been together before."

"Okay then, I'll be waiting for your letter. Have a safe trip."

He was about to walk out of the room when he turned around and said, "Do you want me to go with you to talk to him?"

"No."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, thanks though."

With an exchange of nods he was gone.

Hermione stumbled over to the window and her heart sunk when she saw Ron meandering through the grounds with Harry following closely on his tail. From out in the corridor the noise of somebody thundering up the stairs bounced around the room. Through the open doorway Hermione could see Ginny, closely followed by her Mom, Dad and Mrs. Weasley.

"What in Merlin's name are you doing?" Mrs. Weasley cried out, "You're not ready, the guests are waiting and you're supposed to be down there right now."

Ginny looked over for confirmation from Hermione who gave a slight shake of her head, allowing her curls to bob gently and brush her face.

"Hermione dear," her Mother said, "What's going on?"

"I need to talk to Ron," she want to give them any more than that.

"It's unlucky to see the bride..."

"Mom, I need to talk to him."

"I'll go get him," Ginny volunteered and then quickly scampered out of the room.

"Hermione talk to me, please," she begged.

"I'm sorry," she said to Mrs. Weasley and then pushed her way through the group of stunned adults.

"Hermione," her Mom called from the doorway.

"Let it go, please," she said as she walked down the staircase to break her best friends heart.

Through the open back door he walked, all dressed up in his new black dress robes.

"What's going on?" he asked, "Why aren't you dressed?" his face told her that he knew the answer for that question long before he even asked it.

Extending her arm she opened her palm to his. He grasped it and she pulled him into the empty room and closed the door.

"I'm sorry," she began believing it was best to put that out first, although nothing she knew would make this any easier on him. She knew what he was going to feel like, for she had felt the exact same emotions for almost half a decade.

"No," he shook his head. The usual colour had drained from his face and so she placed a hand on his shoulder and urged him to sit down. She really didn't want him to pass out.

He obliged and perched himself on the edge of the sofa. Sitting down beside him she picked up his hand and enclosed it within her own. They were like ice.

"I never wanted this to happen," she confessed, "I can't stand to see someone hurt like I have since sixth year, especially because of me."

"What are you talking about? What happened?" he demanded.

The truth would take to long to explain so she decided to only tell him what he needed to know.

"Whose the other guy? Have you been seeing him all this time?"

"I'm not seeing anyone. Just you. It's just, I can't love you. Maybe if things had have ended up differently, I don't know. I'm sorry to have led you on like I did."

"So you never intended to marry me. You..." he shook his head and his breathing became ragged.

"No I fully intended to, it's, well somebody told me to do what made me happy. I left him because I couldn't face what he'd done. Now after seeing how much I suffered I regret it. He wasn't a good person, but who is and I loved him."

"Who was he? I deserve to know," Ron roared, the colour in his face turning from pasty white to the same red as his hair.

"It was a long time ago," she tried to reason, "I just can't get over it. Okay?"

"No, it's bloody well not okay. If it's really been that long ago what difference does it make that you tell me his name. And for so long ago why can't you get over it?"

"Ron, I really didn't want to leave on these terms but I see that it may be necessary. I can't get over him because I loved him with all my heart. You can't just walk away from that type of love. Are you going to get over me leaving tomorrow? No, it'll take time and time only numbs the pain. It's never fully gone. I'm really sorry you had to step into my life at such a complicated time. I should be going now. I'm sorry," she'd finally said it and now she needed to get out of there.

"Where will you go?" Ron asked.

"I'll be around," she walked out the door with that. There was no stopping the tears that began to flow, the look on his face was enough to make her loose her last meal.

Up the stairs she ran, pushing past her parents and Mrs. Weasley. Throwing her trunk open she began throwing items of clothing and books into it. Ginny came in obviously sent by her mom to talk some sense into Hermione, but instead she helped her friend pack. Within minutes the trunk was full and the room bare. All except for one item which both Ginny and Hermione turned and stared at.

"Well," Ginny paused.

"It's mine after all, he didn't buy it. I guess I'll take it with me."

"Okay," she reached for the hanger and unhooked it before placing it on the top of the trunk.

"Not that I'll ever want to wear it again," she sighed.

"No, i don't blame you. To many memories."

"Exactly," she nodded her agreement, "Well I guess I should be going."

"What about your parents?"

"I guess I should tell them," with a wave of her wand she levitated her trunk and made it follow her out of the room to meet her parents.

"What's going on?" they demanded.

"I can't do it," she didn't want to divulge more but knew they wouldn't be satisfied with that, "I don't love him and yeah I know I shouldn't have waited this long."

"Why now, what made you do it?" they asked.

"I talked to somebody who I hadn't seen in years and wanted to make sure I was doing the right thing."

"Who?"

"I've got to go."

"Where?"

"They offered me a job last week in Germany and I'm going to go. I'll see you later," and with that she bolted down the stairs with her trunk behind her. From there she apparated to the Ministry to hand in her acceptance of the job posting and then it was time to leave the island for the continent and the new possibilities it brought.

xxx.:.x.

a/n I don't know if this was really necessary but I had somebody suggest a sequel and the idea appealed to me, so this could act as the epilogue of this story or the prologue of the sequel. Either way I hope you enjoyed the story and I hope that if one day I do a sequel you'll all be there again reading. (PS I'm planning to right another Dramione fic now that I'm finished this so I hope you guy's will check in on that.) Happy Holidays and thanks for your support.


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